I'm Not Taking It Again

Blissfulness

Although there was already Arshen in his family. Deri did not feel any real happiness, there was something lacking that he felt. He is like resting on one leg, while one leg has gone from his body. It was difficult for him to get used to it, but he had to guard the hearts of his children.

Every night, Deri always feels at home in the workspace. Only his assistants and confidants were allowed into the room. Children are also prohibited from entering if they do not have an urgent interest. The room was private to him.

Photos with his ex-wife are still neatly displayed there. Deri has not been able to forget Septi from his memory. He still loves Septi. However, she is willing to part with a woman who loves her very much because she wants to see her children happy. Especially Dirga, the child he raised. Dirga felt a huge mistake to Dirga because he had separated his Son from the woman Dirga loved until Dirga chose to leave the house. Deri does not want his relationship with Dirga who has just improved, now turned heated again. Dirga is the precious care of God for him.

Deri's hand touched the figura on the desk. It was a photo of Deri and Septi both on vacation together on the island of Belitong. The place used for filming the big screen movie Laskar Pelangi. Septi's face was still very pretty with the hair that he was Cepol up. His smile was so bright. His ex-wife was very young. Deri's lips were slightly raised when she saw the photo. It was only happiness that they both exuded.

"How are you doing now?" muttered.

From behind bars, the woman that Deri still always remembered could only sit leaning with the bagbih she was holding . The prayer beads were the ones that Deri gave them at their wedding, almost thirty years ago and still Septi kept well. The prayerful sentence he said after he had no activity in the rutan.

Getting into the bars of Septi was like getting into a modern pesantren. He can draw closer to God and ask forgiveness from the owner of the universe. There are so many mistakes he has made. He did a lot of things that were forbidden by God. He has no regrets about going to jail. He was thankful that God still loved him. Rebuke it this way. Septi learned to accept the destiny God had written for him.

Not only did Deri's heart feel empty, Septi felt the same way because of his separation from Deri. Moreover, his two children hated him. His heart is dead. She only has Bunga, the son of her dark relationship with Flower's biological father. A mistake made because of his greed. He had his adopted son marry Bunga on the grounds that Dirga was indebted to Bunga. Though Sepeti did not want the treasure that Dirga had been looking for as long as he escaped from the house did not fall into the hands of others. In fact, Deri did not leave a legacy to him because of his behavior that could not enter into the reason of sane humans.

"I'm sorry Mama, son," said Septi, with his head lowered.

If, recalling Dirga his tears would just drip out. Fortunately, his son had a very big heart. Dias often visited Septi as if there was no grudge he had for his biological mother. Dirga also told Septi that he had forgiven all his mistakes. Which mother's heart will not be touched when hearing the speech of the adopted child. That is what makes Septi more and more want to ask forgiveness for his mistakes to the almighty.

His son often visited him, but Septi was ashamed of Dirga's attitude. He asked Dirga not to see him anymore. Actually his heart ached when he said that. He always wanted to be with his son. However, she had also become a bad mother to Dirga and felt unworthy to receive kindness from her son.

Deri is still in the workspace. The clock is twelve o'clock at night. There is still a sense of loss in Deri's heart. The woman he loved so much betrayed him, and is now languishing behind bars because of reports of the son. Septi almost harmed DIrga's wife and also his future baby. Without Septi knowing, it turns out that Deri is always monitoring his condition through someone who is there.

To this day, the name Septi still fills Dirga's head and heart. He still loves Septi. A woman who can accept what she is. However, there was one thing that stuck in Deri's heart.

"I won't let the kids down again. Especially Dirga," he murmured.

That's what Deri feels. Dirga and Nindy are the most precious treasures that Deri has. She doesn't want to lose her two children for whatever reason. Moreover, when Deri finds out that Septi has a child from another man who is none other than his affair. Teri's heart really hurt. His heart to be hit by a very large stone, bombarded with hot bullets and pierced by a dagger that is very pointed and sharp, so that the blue pain is still attached to the heart of Deri. If there are two options for a wife or child, Deri will choose a child.

Actually, it was Sept's sincerity that made the love in Dirga's heart still exist. Even though he's been hurt. He knew man was the cornerstone of error. There is no perfect person in this world. Moreover, Septi is the first woman who willing to accept Dirga with the airy chest makes him very happy. Even though Dirga was not his son. However, Septi loved her like his own son.

"I already have a child" said the young Deri when meeting Septi. Even the little Dirga at that time always went wherever Deri went.

Just a smile that Septi gave at that time. His hand gently rubbed Dirga's head.

"I also like children," Septi replied with a smile full of sincerity.

Little Dirga who initially did not want to be carried by strangers, the edge when with little Septi Dirg to be carried instead did not want to be lowered.

"Mah-mah."

Her eyes widened perfectly when she heard the words coming out of Dirga's mouth. A very sincere speech that DIrga said. Deri hasn't told me who Dirga really is. He wanted to test Septi. Does he really love Dirga or just a lie.

One month.

Two months.

Three months.

Four months.

Five months.

Septi's getting sticky to Dirga. So too with Dirga. Deri did not find anything strange in Septi's attitude. Septi has a motherly nature that makes Dirga comfortable.

Little by little, Deri's hard heart began to melt. Moreover, Septi always showed his true love to Dirga. Little boy whose fate is very unfortunate because it has been discarded by savage parents.

Dirga always told him about Septi. Little Dirga's face always sparkles when telling stories. Dirga hadn't been this happy before.

"Will Papah have Mamah?" Little Dirga's head nodded quickly. His hands were round the neck of Deri.

"Like Mamah Tepti, yes."

That's why Deri made Septi his wife. When Dirga was comfortable, it must have been a very good woman. The comfort and blessing of his son is the first number.

***

During the Septi crouching in prison, Deri slalu monitors him through an insider. When he received a photo of Septi's face getting more and more thin, making his heart rotten. Septi is not as beautiful as he used to be when he was with her. The face that is usually treated, now has arisen wrinkles and black spots.

Tired of always being behind the scenes, Deri wants to meet Septi in person. He wanted to talk even if only for a moment. He misses really much. Moreover, hearing her extremely soft voice.

"Please" a police officer told Septi. Septi just nodded.

Septi's forehead shriveled when he saw who was visiting him. Both of his eyebrows also swooped sharply. From the back he knew very well that posture, but that was very unlikely to happen. It was the posture of her ex-husband.

"Mas Deri couldn't have looked at me" she said.

Septi continued his footsteps towards the man. Instantly the body turned around and his eyes stared longingly at Septi. Deri just peeked with tears that have been born. It's like a dream for Septi. They looked at each other for a long time without a single word coming out of their mouths.

"M-mas Deri," he said in a soft voice. Septi really did not believe what he saw.

"Is this a dream?" septi again.

While in prison he could only convey his longing to Deri in the prayer he always prayed. Today, God granted his prayers for his true longing. The father of his children is now in front of him. It was all like a dream to her.

Deri smiled happily and nodded slowly towards him. The longing for the smile of the ex-husband is now cured. Septi's eyes are watery. There is a warmth that Septi feels. I wanted to hug the body of the man she loved so much. But he knows who he is now.

"Did Ms. Deri come here to say that she was going to remarry?"

Bad thoughts have haunted her heart.Htinya Snagit fear because actually she still loves her ex-husband. Is Septi willing to allow her husband to remarry? He's definitely going crazy.

But he also needs to be self-aware. Now who is he? Does Deri still love her? Not necessarily. Men open their hearts to women more easily. Unlike the woman who if already disappointed will be difficult to open her heart.

Septi was still staring not far from where Deri was waiting. He began to move his legs towards where Deri was. She ventured to sit across from Deri. Their eyes seemed to speak. Although their mouths were both tightly shut.

One minute.

Two minutes.

Three minutes.

"How are you?" asked Deri in awkward language. It was just like that when he was wasting time.

"Good, Mas." Septi answered it briefly. He himself was confused as to what to answer. Her heart was too happy to see the man she still loved so much. The more days the man gets handsome. Even though he is no longer young.

After a pleasantry greeting, the two of them simply fell silent. No one starts the conversation. Deri was staring at Septi, and Septi was staring at Deri. They are both like humans who are giving up longing because they have not met for months.

There are many things that Septi wants to do, he said. But his mouth felt tightly locked. He could not open his voice at all.

"I want to hug you, Mas," her mind was soft. Deri's embrace gives comfort to Septi. Moreover, a soft swab of Deri's hand that is able to make Septi feel protected. Many Septi miss. Many Septi want to repeat. However, one thing that cannot be repeated is time.

Five minutes later, Deri cut his eyes on Septi. "Thank God you're okay" she replied.

Septi flinched with Deri's words. He thought that Deri would say the word miss. In fact it's not like that. Septi saw there was a glimmer of hatred from Deri's eyes.

When Deri was about to get up from his seat, Septi made a slight jump. Her ex-husband only spoke of that.

"I'm just here to find out about you. Excuse me," Deri said and left.

Septi's tears were shed without excuse. His heart was very sick and he assumed that Deri was still angry with him. Just this time Septi was dealing with a tremendous amount of pain.

"I'm sorry, Mom. I'm so sorry" she cried with tears.

In the car, Deri lowered her head on the steering wheel. He spilled all his sadness when he saw Septi's completely different face. Skin color that is slightly darkened, fine wrinkles are clearly visible and the body is thinner. The hair has also turned white. Different when she was Lady Deri.

"I can't linger. I can't bear to see you" he murmured again.

Deri's affection overcame her hatred. This is Deri, if you love someone, you will continue to love them. Although accidentally or accidentally Septi made a mistake.

Any anger is Deri, but he can't be angry for too long with Septi. His ex-wife has been very important in his life. Moreover, he was already willing to take care of Dirga from toddlers with very sincere affection. After Nindy was born, Septi continued to love Dirga.

His heart says that he wants to return to Septi. But the logic refused. Septi's a bad and inappropriate woman Deri defended. Deri's heart and mind are not in line.

The thing that makes it hard for Deri to return to Septi is his two children. They are the sun that continues to shine on Deri's life. He did not want to sacrifice his two children. He was wrong because he had made Dirga run away from home. He doesn't want that to happen again. He wants to enjoy his old age with his children, son-in-law and grandchildren.

"The Father has promised Papah himself that Papah will sacrifice Papah's happiness for your sake, Dirga. Papah doesn't want you to suffer like you're a baby. Papah raised you as a child because Papah wants to see you happy. Your happiness is everything to Papah. Papah will ignore this pain," he murmured in a very heavy voice.

She didn't want her two children to hate her. He doesn't want to be selfish. Let him give his best to Dirga and Nindy. Although his heart was pierced by a long dagger.