CURTAINS OF THE PAST

THE SAME PAIN

Although it ends in a different story, but still the same feeling. A few weeks from the month, even months ago. Reminds me of all times.

Yes, but that is memory. Unsolicited but giving, uninvited but coming.

God tests the patient heart, for God may protect. Verily, it is only those who are patient, that their reward is met without limit.

I always remember.. He said, “that the promise of God is true”…

Ma’alama, o owner of the soul that is missed…

The pain came back. Again and again Toni smacked her chest with her own fist. He hoped that the pain embedded within his chest would be slightly lessened by it. But alas, the pain was growing and piercing to the heart of his heart.

He still remembers once that the doctor stated it was too late to know the condition of Milka who suffered from Leukemia. During that time, she had indeed never seen her Milka complain of pain though. Not even Kamelia and Kemil could have expected it.

The leukemia that Milka suffered came and hurt her little daughter so suddenly. He himself could do nothing. Many times Iffah tried to calm him down, although Iffah himself was also hit with the decision of the hospital.

Milka had been in a coma for five days and even her disease had invaded her vital organs. And because it did not improve, some of his life support tools were revoked.

What was more painful then for Toni? Lost her Milka? Or see the suffering of his best friend who gave birth to his little daughter?

More precisely his guilt was more painful to him back then. Feeling guilty has become the biological father of his own best friend's son. Feeling guilty for making her Milka must feel pain due to genetic factors from her family. And feel guilty for all the misery of the mother of her little daughter.

*****

It has been almost ten hours Milka only use breathing apparatus and infusion of body fluids, so that one by one the function of her vital organs decreased. Kamelia was no longer able to withstand her fear of losing the little princess she loved so much. He cried in front of Milka who looked conscious, but drooped weakly on the hospital bed.

“I-buu... Ke-na-pa i-bu na-ngis?” Ask Milka weakly and stammered. “A-yes... Ke-na-pa i-bu na-ngis?” Milka asked Kemil who was trying hard in front of him because he never got an answer from Kamelia.

“No-why, Darling.” Sahut Kemil while kissing Milka's little fingers are increasingly taking care of. “Milka wants something, Son?” Tawar Kemil with his voice increasingly hoarse and painful in his throat.

“Mil Ghi-ndu de-dek Cak-khhaa..” Little Milka's voice is barely audible. Clear fluid flows from the edges of his eyes that are swollen.

“We phone Dedek Cakra use video call yes, dear.” Persuade Kemil again. Milka nodded softly agreeing to her father's offer.

Tut…

“Assalamu’alaikum Kemil.” Appears Rahmah's face from inside the screen of Kemil's phone.

“Wa’alaikumussalam, Ma. Mah, where's Cakra Ma? Milka misses him.” Kemil was trying to hold back his tears when all his family had cried in that room.

“Dedek Cakra.. Look dear, there's Milka's sister. He misses Cakra.” very much Rahma moved towards Cakra who was in her bed, and faced her phone screen to Cakra's tiny face.

“De-deek...” Excited Milka with such vigor and without regard for the pain she was enduring at the time. Baby Cakra who did not understand anything just laughed looking at his brother's face from behind the screen of his grandmother's phone.

Yeah, ever since Milka was hospitalized. Rahmah and Maya will take turns keeping Cakra at Toni's house. Even Kamelia very rarely breastfeeds her little son, so Cakra is forced to be given a tube milk for a while if Kamel is late to breastfeed his little son.

“Dedeek, de-dek ja-ngan na-kal yes. Ka-si-han i-bu and a-yah. Ka-kak want ti-dur du-lu.” Pamitnya.

After her video call ended, Milka slowly tried to raise her left hand and turned her head towards Toni. “Pa-paah.” Call him to be approached. His other hand tightly grasped Kemil's index finger. However, he loved Kemil as his father.

Toni tried to rub her tears violently, and then approached Milka with a smile that she managed to make.

“Iya darling.” Toni said with her hoarse voice. “Mil want bo-bok, Pa-pa and a-yah te-ma-ni Mil di-si-ni du-lu yes.” His love is so spoiled.

“Iya darling, yes. Papa will stay here for Milka.” Toni quickly nodded her head.

O Allah. If a miracle exists for my little Milka, then heal him O Allah. But if death is better for him, then take him without pain and leave no lingering pain for us he left behind.~ Please Toni in her heart. But who knows? In the heart of Kemil also has the same do’a.

Clear liquid back flowing from the edges of the beautiful eyes Milka narrowed. A second later, he closed his eyes so tightly without wanting to open them again. His hands that were still clutching his father's fingers and papa at that time drooped weakly helpless. He had been silent without a sigh though.

“Innalilahi wa inna ilaihi roji’un.” Desir Kemil slowly. Her tears, which had been held up since Milka was diagnosed by a doctor in front of her family, finally spilled instantly. She lost the beautiful daughter she

take care of it from inside his wife's womb. Although not born from his biology, but Milka was born from his heart. That was how he always told his wife, when she felt contempt in his presence.

All the cries of the Milka family broke, even Ghali who was there also let out her tears. Iffah immediately clasped Toni's shoulders to divide the little power he felt was still left in him.

“Darling, My little Milka..” Toni's whispers bitterly in the deck of Iffah. He was so beaten. Losing loved ones in a not too long time.

The beginning of your life is earthly, but the end of your life is death. Everyone even witnessed, how death did not choose age and place.

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Sorry buddy2

indeed RADETSA plans to make a story Milka, but RADETSA has not understood the science.

RADETSA is afraid of reaping the counterversion of the readers later. Plus RADETSA pity MILKA even though she is only a character in the novel. Once again sorry if I had to add a wound to our TONI

greetings one screen AT MT&NT