Between Me, You And Them

STARTING FROM TODAY

NANDA

"Not slept yet?"

Elsi woke me from my daydream. I looked at her who was lying on the bed.

"Not El. Brother's not sleepy."

"Tomorrow we leave in the morning loh bang..."

"Yes, I'll be sleeping soon."

He paused for a moment and pulled back his blanket.

I don't know, I don't feel sleepy at all, unlike Elsi. For a moment he was sleepy and asleep.

He said that if he was stressed, he would fall asleep more. As for me, if many problems tend not to be able to fall asleep and just dreamy pensive.

Yeah, like I did tonight. I'm done with all my business. All of my social media has been removed, I created a new Whatsapp account and all of it is new.

I did it so that no one would look for me, especially my family. That is if they are looking for me. Not angry with me.

What are they doing now?

Daddy's? And mother? Are they angry with me?

Are they disappointed in me?

I am a child who has committed sins. And embarrass the family.

How do they talk to the people closest to us about my departure? Did they tell the truth? Or lie to cover my disgrace?

I was crying again. I was not able to part with them. My heart still hurts a lot considering now I have no one but Elsi.

I'm gonna lose them for a while. Fighting themselves. For my life, and the life of the woman who is now in front of me.

I can no longer hug my mother if I feel fragile and broken. No more friends telling me my complaints.

If I go back, will he accept me as his son again? With what I've done?

I can feel his disappointment from here. I could feel her heartache when she read the contents of my letter. My confession of sins.

But I could not bear to witness their disappointment with me. I'm a very proud boy proud of them.

I turned off my HP and put it on the table. I leaned on the sofa I was sitting on.

There are still 4 hours before the flight. Before everything was right I stayed. Before I really opened a new chapter in my life.

******

I sat next to Elsi who was waiting in the waiting room. Our plane leaves in about 30 minutes.

"Drink first. Elsi want a prick?" I handed him a bottle of tea and offered him a bag of snacks.

This morning he did not want to eat. I forced her. Though what I read, usually pregnant women will often be hungry. Because she shares food with her fetus.

He took the bottle. And refused his snack.

"Eat first. At least a biscuit. Didn't want breakfast, now don't want it?"

He still shakes unwillingly.

"Eat first. It's an order, not a request." I told her again in a flat voice. He took the package by force.

Ever since he was kicked out of his house, he's been more obedient to me now. Maybe she thought, I'm the one person she's got right now. He also said that to me.

"Now?" He offered me a piece of biscuit in my mouth. I shakes unwillingly. I'm already full. Because I had breakfast when he didn't.

"It's an order." He replied to me with a flat face. He looks like he wants to prank me.

"Yes yes, okeeee." I opened my mouth and she fed me with the biscuits she ate.

"Elsi believes in you, right?" I asked in between my chews.

"Yes bang... Bang, but really, the brother's family that we will come here will not report to the house brother if we run there?"

I will indeed take him to the house of the son of the mother's cousin. Mother's "wasted" cousins".

Why wasted? Because he's the same as me. He did something unusual for those closest to us.

He was a same-sex person and all the family knew. Ever since he admitted to her candidly, even being evicted by his own parents, he was now just a kara and never again came into contact with our extended family. He shunned himself, pulled away from us.

But only with me is he still often contact contact contact. Even with social media.

Because to me it's her problem, her self problem with her parents. I have no right to judge him in the slightest. No one has the right to judge the way of life they choose other than their God.

I called her that night before I ran away from home. I asked if I could live there, one city with her.

Because I don't know where to run. There are many places in the world, but I still feel I need the support of people who can understand my situation.

He gladly invited me to come to his house. We even want to pay our travel expenses. What I clearly refuse, there is no way I can repot to that extent.

Once I get there, I'll stay home by myself. It's up to me to contract or spend, which obviously I won't depend and trouble her.

I still have my savings on living expenses for a while, I'll find a job there. Whatever it is I'll be willing to do.

He said I don't have to worry about everything, he'll help me to the fullest.

I was moved, he could still do good even though he had been thrown out by his family. Though he could have replied to me, no matter with me and my difficulties.

"God is not El. He's a good man and can be trusted."

Elsi extended her hand to me. I welcome his grasp.

"We can definitely face this bang. Sure. Elsi believes in herself. And strongly believe in my brother. Thank you so much for not running away from this. Not many men want to give up their whole lives to be responsible for what they have done. Elsi's lucky that guy's brother. Although the way we found like this, Elsi sincere. No one Elsi regrets. As for how we are with our family, we will face it together."

I smiled hearing her. My spirit was instantly filled back. Right said Elsi, we can definitely go through her. We are not alone. We filled the void with each other.

I promise in my own heart I'll give our lives back when everything is ready.