Red Threads

The Hidden Destruction

Mika should know, according to Anggita to visit Kai's house is not a good idea. It was evident, even when they were five hundred yards from the man's house.

Cold sweat soaked Mika's forehead, although the air conditioner in Anggita's car was very cold. His legs would not stop to move, along with the thump of uneasiness in his chest. He bites his lower lip, occasionally accompanied by a long sigh— which does not make his feelings better at all.

What if the guy doesn't want to accept his arrival? What if Kai laughs at him because he came to the guy first? What if Kai thinks he's unstable? What if Kai is really going to stay away from her? The series of questions swirled in Mika's head, until it felt like it was about to explode.

But, the angel chose silence. The girl does not act, despite knowing Mika who already looks like a hot worm. The girl simply laughed and threw a meaningful gaze, silently. No need to ask again. He knew why Mika was acting this way.

Anggita driver-driven car stops right in front of a simple house, with a spacious yard—though not as wide as Mika's house. The rage that enveloped Mika's heart grew even more intense. He refused to move. However, Anggita actually glared sharply when he said his reluctance. So inevitably, he had to follow the girl.

I hope no one is home.

Mika continued to mutter the sentence in her heart, ever since getting out of the car. He knew the chances of Kai not being home were very small. The guy's motorbike was even parked sweetly in the yard.

Fucking me! That speech ended the murmur in Mika's heart. The door in front of him opened. The face of a man peering through the door.

Mika frowned. The face of the man is foreign. He didn't even see the guy while staying at Kai's house that day.

“Who to look for?” ask the guy. His voice is cold. There was no friendly look on his face.

“What Kai is at home?” Anggita's voice sounded soft, a little hesitant.

“Whose are you?” Mika could not stand the look of the face that the guy put on. If it wasn't for the courtesy ethics of visiting, he would have already thrown his shoes.

“We... his friend Kai.” Anggita's floating answer, made the guy squeak suspiciously.

“Kai not home!” rest the guy, who managed to silence Anggita instantly.

Mika clucking. Both of his arms folded across his chest. The gesture he always made whenever he felt annoyed with someone. He who originally hoped that if Kai was not home, now just hope that the guy comes and drives away the annoying guy in front of him. “I know Kai is inside. Why did you say there was no?”

Anggita nudged Mika's waist. Warns Mika to be more polite. However, Mika could not take it anymore. Stupid time with courtesy.

“He's not home. Why don't you believe it?” the man replied with a sharp look fixed on Mika.

“How can I believe, if I see for myself the motor he is on the page.” Mika pointed at Kai's motor with a glance of her eyes. The answer made that annoying guy finally give up. The guy lets Mika and Anggita in, though still with a suspicious look.

“Whose name are you?” asked the man, after closing the door.

“I Anggita. This is Mika,” Anggita replied, overzealous. In fact, his voice sounded higher than before.

Mika twisting eyeballs. The guy was indeed quite handsome with thick eyebrows, firm jaws, and dimples on both cheeks every time he spoke. But, how can Angita be wrong with such a shitty guy?

“Mika,” murmured the guy. “So, you whose name is Mika?” The cold face of that fellow vanished completely. The guy's eyes flashed enthusiastically, like he had just received a lottery prize of tens of millions of rupiah.

Mika nodded. His eyes threw a look of wonder. He thought, Have they met before?

“Gue Reza, older cousin Kai.” The guy smiled thinly. Making Anggita must close his mouth tightly with one hand so as not to scream. The girl did not even distract from the pair of dimples on the guy's cheeks at all. Fortunately, Mika immediately squeezed the girl's fingers firmly. Aggita is indeed weak on the charms of handsome guys, but as long as Mika knows the girl, Anggita has never really switched from Nagra.

“Kai ever told you about lo to me. Come on, come with me,” said Reza, then. He walked first to the room where Mika had stayed. The guy's turning the door hinge. Then, open the door with a little push. From the small gap created, they could only see the darkness that enveloped the room.

“But sorry, only Mika can enter.” The man advised, while looking at Anggita with apologetic highlight.

Mika wants to ask her the reason, but is stopped because Anggita threw a sharp plot and pushed slowly so that Mika would enter immediately. Mika finally relented, and entered the dark room.

The dense aroma of cigarette smoke invaded Mika's sense of smell, as she set foot in the room. Luckily, he remembered the furniture there. So, it does not hit anything even in the dark. Mika fumbles on the wall to look for the light switch. The darkness made him confused and claustrophobic.

A few seconds later, the room lights glowed. Brightest. Mika can see everything in the room, including Kai sitting on the bed. The guy leaned against the wall, with a straight look. The guy's eyes are empty. In between Kai's index and middle fingers, there was a lit cigarette butt.

Mika spread her gaze to the floor. More than ten cigarette butts were scattered there. The anxiety that had originally enveloped him instantly disappeared, replaced by worry. I don't know, it's like seeing Nagra back. Kai's condition, almost resembles Nagra's that day. Messy, broken, and depressed. Then, he approached Kai with wide steps.

“Kai,” Mika says softly. Very downright. It sounds like a whisper.

Kai only caught a glimpse of it. Then, look back at the wall. Just like it was. The look remained empty. As if, there was no life behind those dark eyes.

Instantly, tightness squeezed Mika's chest. Kai is really pathetic. The man's face was pale, his hair was messy, and thick eye bags hung up. Scars and bruises are also clearly visible. Plus reddened eyeballs. Either due to lack of sleep, or too much exposure to cigarette smoke.

Just now, Mika was about to ask about what happened. Kai's heavy voice interrupted first. “Ngapain lo here?”

“K—kai, you why?” Mika was unaware of having used that call again. A call that breaks down the barriers between them.

"Go!” That was all Kai said in response to Mika's question. The voice sounded so cold, tired, and full of emphasis.

Mika ignored Kai's orders. He remained unmoved in place, without taking his eyes off the man. “Kai, what's—”

“GUE SAID GO! Lo budek, huh?” Kai yells at Mika. The girl even covered her mouth with her hands to hold back the screeches.

Kai clenched his jaws tightly. His eyes were closed, but his teeth were grinding. A few seconds later, with great emphasis, he screamed again. “Go, Mika! GO!”

Mika remained unmoved. He was reluctant to leave, even though he was beginning to be frightened. Look Kai's eyes really sharp. If that look of an eye could incarnate an arrow, he would have been killed.

“Gue don't need you to come here! Damnit!” Kai did not scold Mika. But more to yourself.

“Why do you have to come here? Why do you have to look at me like a gini?” Kai's voice trembled, filled with a desperate roar. The guy rubbed his face rough. Then, it started banging the back of its head against the wall. Time and time again. Mika has to take action.

"Stop, Kai. Stop.” Mika yells. His hand tries to hold Kai's head up, but the guy repeatedly brushes over and pushes him away.

Feeling Mika will stop at nothing to hold him back, Kai finally pushed Mika hard. To cause Mika's back to hit the bed divider. Mika grimaced in pain. However, it was soon eclipsed by Kai's clasping.

“Gue don't need you to come here! I don't want you to see me as a loser!" Kai ruffled his hair. Then, back banging his head against the wall.

“I beg you to stop. Don't hurt yourself anymore. You're not a loser, Kai." Mika yells. Tears have washed his cheeks. Although overwhelmed, Mika finally managed to pull Kai in her hand summary. Restraining every movement of the man so as not to hurt himself anymore.

Kai roared. Yells. Trying to escape. That guy's crying. Things that Mika had never seen all this time. In each of her stuffing, Mika could clearly capture the destruction that was never spoken of. 

“It's no use anymore I live. I'm just a source of trouble. I've ruined my parents' life, Nagra's life, and now I've ruined my life lp Everyone left me. There's no point in me living, Ka. I just want to die! I WANT TO DIE!” Kai pushes Mika, trying to release Mika's arm that shuts her body. However, her movements stopped as Mika cupped her two cheeks.

"Kai, listen to me. That's not the source of the problem. Lo it's Kai. The guy who made me feel happy. The guy who once saved my life on the roof of the school. Guys who've made me feel like there's still a lot of fun in my life."

Kai heard that. The calmness had made him quiet for a while. Suddenly, the pain was again felt. Kai rebelled again. “That's me! Why are you still here? LO BUDEK OR BEGO?”

Mika shook her head strongly. “Ngak. I will not leave Lo”

“Damn it!” Kai threw down Mika's check. Get the girl back on the hook. “Do you meet me again?”

Mika grimaces. His back was in pain as it hit the wall hard. “Gue to nemenin lo. I don't want to feel alone.” Mika was silent for a moment. He brushed his tears, swallowing his saliva. “Gue don't want to lose lo.”

Silent. Kai's pair of dark eyes emitted something unread. Mika sculpting. Waiting for what reaction the guy will give.

But a few seconds later, Kai cried. Just crying. No more screaming, no more self-harm.

What the hell is going on? Why did Kai become like this?

That question has bothered Mika's mind ever since setting foot in Kai's room. Questions that have not yet been answered. And, in fact, growing even more powerful.

Mika approached Kai, slowly. Beware, if only the guy went back to rampaging. He touched Kai's shaking arm. No rejection reaction. Finally, Mika ventured to pull the guy in her hand summary. Let Kai cry on his shoulder.

♥

“From yesterday, Kai has tried to commit suicide twice.” Reza opened the conversation, as she and Mika sat on the porch of the house. Anggita has gone home first because he got a call from his mother.

"Why?” Mika did not believe in something she had just heard. Wasn't it Kai that day that prevented him from committing suicide?

Reza was silent for a moment. His fingers tapped on the arm of the chair beside him. Her view glazed. There's a concern there. Does he have to tell the truth, or let Mika ask Kai herself?

And a few seconds later—after making sure that telling the truth will not cause any new problems—Reza finally opened his mouth. "He feels useless. Since childhood, she has been abandoned by her parents. They assume he's just a bully, a destroyer of happiness.” Reza paused his explanation. His view turned to Mika. “He started feeling better after meeting you. You know, Kai didn't kill Nagra. But he always felt guilty. Because a few days before Nagra died, they had a dispute. Kai even beat up Nagra. He didn't have time to apologize. That's what makes him really down when you say, that Nagra died because of him. And, because you don't want to meet him."

Instantly, Mika recalled the video of Kai beating Nagra that she got from Raga that day. Assuming true, Kai has his own reasons why the incident happened. But he doesn't know about the reason. “Actually, what is Kai hiding? What happened between Kai and Nagra?"

Reza. He closed his eyes for a few seconds. Worryingly. He knew Kai wouldn't like it if he told him what was hidden. However, he did not want Mika to continue to be trapped in the wrong assumption about Kai. After all, he would not be willing if his cousin was called a murderer.

Reza opened his eyes again. He took a long breath. Then, looked at Mika with great earnestness. “You can ask Kai yourself, if he's better. I don't want to violate her privacy. Tell Samuel, too, that he attacked the wrong man." Reza said goodbye to entering the house for a while, after saying so.

"Samuel?" mumbling Mika. He recalled his meeting with Samuel in the twelve-grade corridor that day. That day, Samuel was visibly riled up when he mentioned Kai by name. "Why Samuel?"

Not also finding answers and failing to get information from Kai, Mika finally decides to go home. After all, Raga had also arrived in front of Kai's house.

"What are you doing here? Whose house is this?" todong Raga sets foot on the terrace of Kai's house. The boy's eyes glanced down every corner of the courtyard.

"It's home—" Not yet had Mika answer that question, Reza was already standing in the doorway. He was about to say goodbye to go home, but seeing the surprised look on the two men made him stop.

Mika looked at Reza and Raga in turn. Reza's face was stiff with a sharp look. Meanwhile, Raga's face paled with her lips tightly pursed.

What happened to them?

The freeze lasted only a few seconds. Reza is quicker to take control of the situation. The guy commented a big smile, and walked over to Raga who was still standing tensely in her place.

“Hello, Raga! We haven't seen each other for a long time. How are you doing? How's Alana doing?” Reza pats Raga on the shoulder. They are old friends who have just met.

Hearing that, Mika rounded her eyes wide. In a high and shocked voice, he shouted. "ANA?"