Love In Pesantren's

Love In Pesantren's
Set-off



Nimas Pov's


I came home with a big heart, intentionally or unintentionally Hulliyah's words ignited a little bit of my anger as a woman.


The one I couldn't accept, when Hulliyah said A Zam was comfortable with other women.


Haisshh do I have to believe, do I care so much?


In fact, my heart is hard to lie to, I have to find out for myself how close A Zam is to Hannah. Yeah, I have to see it first. Before I see it for myself I have to be normal and mediocre.


-------------------------


At night when the children were asleep, I went out of the room looking for A Zam who did not enter the room.


Ah A Zam sleeping in front of the television again?


Without me knowing almost every day A Zam slept outside the room. I was too tired to take care of it, I always fell asleep first with the kids.


Oh is it true that A Zam is lonely?


I rarely hear his stories.


Is it true that A Zam has found a new story?


Keep this prejudice, Lord!


I looked at her face for a long time, a face that always teased me. A speck of guilt rained down on my chest. I completely forgot A Zam because of his son.


A drop of two tears slowly flowed down my cheeks.


"Miss...."


A Zam's raucous voice startled me, I immediately shed tears to show him a warm smile.


A Zam wriggled and woke up from his sleep when he realized I was sitting next to him.


"The kids are asleep?"


One nod from me made A Zam smile meaningfully.


"Hmm..neng kangen huh? Tumben deketine."


At the sight of that, his smile started to go wrong.


"Why is Aa sleeping here?" I said.


"Every day is also here, right inside the neng's cramped."


I was silent for a moment, right what A Zam said.


It wasn't him who was wrong but I was insensitive from the start.


"Can I get Aa here?" I said.


A Zam looked astonished and seemed to object.


"Wait for the kids to wake up?"


"Yes, it can't be."


I'm upset uh, I'd better go back to the room. Not yet had I moved, A Zam hugged my body tightly carrying me in his warm embrace.


"No, I was just nanya. I want to sleep with me again."


Huh huh?


It means A Zam is lonely.


My guilt grew on him. Now in his arms I have apologized many times in my heart.


Tonight I'm spending time with A Zam telling me whatever I want to tell you. The children are sound in the cradle of their dreams, maybe they are giving their father and mother a chance to talk to each other.


The night was getting late we were still cool to tell about the activity last day.


"The plan will be Friday I go to the home again" said A Zam.


I just dehem agreed, yes but I don't think I'd be willing if A Zam met Hannah continuously.


"Well, I can see Hannah all the time."


May I say a little sarcasm.


A Zam suddenly turned my back on my body.


Jamb.


Heartbroken at the instant of hearing A Zam praise another woman. Next thing I do is sleep, stop! I don't want to hear anything anymore. I close my eyes and close my ears, I still hear A Zam talk but I don't respond I just want to sleep.


---------------


On Friday, it was a coincidence that my mother came to visit. I asked my mother to take care of my children for a while. While I'm gonna be an impromptu detective trailing A Zam to Panti.


The sun that crawled up into the sky did not dampen my intention to find out the truth of A Zam. At least if I have to be disappointed I've prepared myself for it.


The Angkot I was traveling in stopped near this big mosque, the mosque that A Zam founded with his friends.


I walked a little overcast because the mosque area was very quiet. Where is A Zam?


When I ran into a boy who was about ten years old, I finally got the information that A Zam was in the pond behind the mosque.


Surely A Zam has very often visited here, the proof is that the child I asked immediately recognized the characteristics of A Zam.


Slowly I entered the area in the mosque, looking for a way to get to the place that the child was appointed.


Do I follow my husband like this?


The laughter sounded louder and louder as I approached the back of the mosque. My feet were shaking, behind the last wall my eyes were beginning to catch the crowd.


Everyone seemed happy in his laughter, all those people I didn't recognize. My eyes explored looking for the whereabouts of A Zam behind the crowd.


Like a flash of lightning striking that fast was also a beating heart when he saw A Zam talking in such a sweet way.


With who?


A woman I once thought was gone from our lives is still very close to my husband.


The instant this courage appeared, I was enraged!


I'm at home taking care of his son, while he's here partying.


I don't care about all the eyes that look at me.


As soon as I got in front of them, my eyes were so dark I unknowingly held this hand right against Hannah's cheek.


The sound of meeting my hands and her cheeks loudly sounded to grab attention.


"Miss!"


Banging A Zam dawned on me that we were being watched. Without a word A Zam pulled my hand leaving people shocked at my actions.


A Zam dragged me away from the crowd, A Zam blew away my weightless body. I don't even realize what I've done. Oh my God why I am this way.


"Why you?"


A moment after we were in a place that no one could reach, A Zam spoke very sharply.


I'm silent.


"You're shy!"


Very painful words I heard coming out of my husband's mouth.


I looked at him with high-level disappointment, my eyes blurry as the accumulated tears were ready to fall.


"Do you know who that is? They're donors from out of town, what would they say if they knew I had an immoral wife like you?"


As I grew older, I really didn't expect A Zam to say such hurtful words.


"I'm sorry now!"


Huh huh?


A Zam pulled my hand back to where Hannah was. A Zam's grip is very strong as if I am a prisoner who cannot escape.


The stares of those moneyed people seem to intimidate me, I'm really a villain here.


"Sorry everyone! This is my wife, sorry for the misunderstanding and inconvenience. Looks like I failed to educate my wife, once again I apologize."


After making an apology to everyone who hurt my heart so much, I'm now being dragged to meet Hannah.


Wanting me to run from this situation, I was consumed by incitement.


A Zam must have hated me after this incident.


***