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episode 59 Raisa can no longer stem her tears



Raisa calls Sam, she asks Sam to buy her some packs of cigarettes and also some low-grade alcoholic beverages, she needs to calm down. he told Sam to drop off his clothes for Raisa to go to college tomorrow.


he couldn't have gone out on his own pesantren let alone told Raihan.


Sam told his men to the pesantren, he could not drive himself because the work piled up.


he must complete the report he must send to Raisa to be checked again by Raisa.


Raihan went into the room with food and a bag.


he saw Raisa was already in the room leaning her body on the chair, her closed eyes made her face look beautiful according to Raihan


" eat first" while sitting next to Raisa.


Raisa opened her eyes she saw a handsome man in Koko's shirt and the sheath that was still attached looked calm.


Raihan sat himself in the chair next to Raisa he brought food and a bag.he placed a plate filled with rice on the table near them sitting.


" sam called" he also put the bag he was carrying on the floor.


Raisa who heard the roar calling Sam's name only glanced at Raihan


"he had his men deliver this" his hand thrust a bag at Raisa


Raisa only glimpsed "put it there" while moving her chin .


"why not tell my brother if we need something, we can go to the department store in front of the boarding house?" while her eyes were watching Raisa,


" from now on if you need something to say the same brother, let Brother do it" raihan's hand moved to get rid of the child's hair on Raisa's forehead,then the hand moved down gently and stroked Raisa's cheek.


Raisa who gets a soft touch from Raihan tries to dodge by moving her head away she feels her heart beating faster than usual.


Raihan smiled gently, knowing that Raisa was uncomfortable with her touch.


" we eat first?" Raihan took the plate he put on the table


" hold your brother take a drink" Raihan moved from his seat he went back out of the room to take a drink.


"eat for yourself what in a bribe?" tanya Raihan who arrived was already back nearby


" himself?"


" we eat a plate together" Raihan held out a spoon to Raisa


Raisa received the spoon that Raihan gave her, she was actually still full but what else she wanted to eat it anyway , she did not want to disappoint Raihan who had taken food for them.


"Without taking this, do you like it? if you don't let me take the others?"Raihan only brought rice with vegetables asem asem meat, that's all Raihan thought he knew Raisa did not like the cuisine that smells of chicken or fish


" no need" Raisa started scooping the food Raihan brought, they ended up eating a plate together,


" wear crackers willingly" Raihan offered it to Raisa


Raisa just shook her head


as they were enjoying the food Raisa occasionally glanced at Raihan, as their eyes accidentally met Raihan smiling


" what's the matter hmmm...?"


Raisa turned her face away.


"want to go again?" haggling Raihan to Raisa


Raisa shook her head


" this is a drink first" while giving a bottle of cold drink to Raisa, without answering Raisa immediately received a drink that was offered by Raihan


" yes you've put it down first" while tidying up the traces of food scattered on the floor


"on the rag first his mouth" as his hand moved to pick up the tissue on the table and wipe Raisa's mouth slowly


Raisa who doesn't know Raihan will do this can only stay still for a while


" dah...,"while throwing the tissue container into the dish.


"i put this down" Raihan picked up the plate on the table, he stood up from his seat and stepped towards the door .


when he opened the door he looked back, he saw Raisa open the bag and take a cigarette and a bottle of drink


Raihan is direct in the heart


" attagfirullah.ya Allah is this a test for the servant whom I must accept.give your ridhomu to pass well .


Raihan walked out of the room, not forgetting that he closed it back so that no one would see Raisa that way.


Raisa started smoking cigarettes inside, in her face rubbing violently, she looked up at the sky there were no stars there, she then opened the bottle with one bite , he began to enjoy his habit of smoking accompanied by his favorite drink and busy with his hape.


Raihan who saw Raisa from behind the door only took a breath and became excited


he chose to read the Qur'an to calm himself down .


Raisa who heard Raihan teaching smiled wryly, why did God choose a scenario like this for her


without Raisa realizing that her tears were dripping out, her feelings were jumbled, why it became this complicated, if there was no aunt, Mamang, Umi and Abi who were so hopeful about this marriage,if they knew he was tormented by this situation.


POV Raisa


when my tears unknowingly dripped out, I realized that there was a sad feeling that I could no longer bear.


hearing him read the Qur'an made me smile wryly, this is very sad


it is very funny, as well as disgusting, on the other hand my husband walks on the straight path while I am his wife walking on the path of heresy


it's so unfair to Raihan, he's so perfect for people people to have to get me who's just a piece of trash.


is this fair to Raihan who is so good, that thought is always lodged in my brain


if I hadn't seen Mamang's happy gaze and aunt's over my marriage I might have left Raihan by now


if I didn't feel how much sad I am that I even thought I was his own daughter maybe I could easily finish this marriage


but all just a heavy desire for me to do that guy's got me depressed between staying or leaving.


POV Raihan


I knew Raisa was so tormented by this situation, I had forced her, I thought it wouldn't be this complicated, but in fact there were so many who were against us.


I know they love me, they want the best for me.


why can't they appreciate my choice.


kasian Raisa he who is always blamed with this situation, even though here I am the one who forced him, may be said I was the one who set him up.


seeing him drink makes me digstifar many times, is this really my choice, why God gave my soul mate like this, is this really a test for my faith, or is it my selfishness for obeying ***** demon.


if this is just my selfishness why God moved my heart to him,


in each of my prayers I always ask for the best soul mate for me, if Raisa is my soul mate I ask Him to bring us closer,but if not I ask Him to keep my prayers away in the third of my night after I feel a different feeling for Raisa.


if I establish myself to marry her, it is because of the instructions of God, to choose her I have gone through a long night every day.


Raihan finished reading the Qur'an, he put the Qur'an on his study table.


he walked towards the balcony approaching Raisa at the sight of Raisa his wife looked sad, the vision slowly sitting beside Raisa,


" already" while picking up the bottle that Raisa was holding,


" it's night we sleep"with a nod of the head


Raisa saw Raihan her husband was so patient, making Raisa's eyes again glazed, she tried to hold him back from falling


"we sleep ....."Raihan repeated the word.


now that Raisa's tears can no longer be held, those tears fall back on her cheeks


with Raihan slowly rubbing the tears of Raisa, she was so sad to see her loved ones suffering from it, in the embrace of Raisa's body,


"sorry" said Raihan in a hoarse voice, he kissed Raisa's head,


Raisa who could not hold back any more chest tightness vaporized her in Raihan's arms, her crying voice made Raihan even more sad.


" i'm sorry" that word he was able to say while continuing to kiss Raisa's head.


when Raisa had stopped crying, Raihan slowly led Raisa to bed, he helped Raisa lie down, and then followed Raisa up on the bed.


back in Raisa's body he clasped into her arms.


" may you have a good dream" by slowly kissing Raisa's forehead.


Raisa feels comfortable in Raihan's arms, letting Raihan hug and kiss her.


Raihan wants Raisa to be comfortable with him , he wants to be with her Raisa feels protected, he also wants to be with her Raisa happy.


eventually they both go the same way to dreamland.