About Taste

Andra's Regret

Andra looked down sadly, when Ella's body was no longer visible. With a feeling that when it was chaotic, Andra stepped away from the place. He said goodbye to Ms. Halimah who was guarding the store, and with a shaky step he walked towards his car.

Andra stared at Ella's house while gripping the steering wheel of the car.

"Why am I this stupid, why am I never aware of Ella's feelings. And why am I only now aware of my feelings. Ella now belongs to Kairi. He used to take Papa, now he's taking Ella. Why do I always lose to him," Andra said as she ruffled her hair violently.

Then he started the engine and drove it very fast. He no longer cared about his safety, right now his mind was completely muddled.

It did not take long, andra finally arrived at his destination. Not the house, but the apartment. It takes time to calm down.

After parking her car, Andra made a quick step towards her apartment. He went straight into his room and sat down at the edge of the bed.

Andra tried hard to hold back the tears, her heart completely shattered after realizing reality.

"Why does it have to be like this, Ella, I'm sick of losing you. I need you, I need you so much" Andra said, looking down.

Then he got off the bed and sat on the floor holding his head.

"Why is it always Kairi who gets me hurt. He used to take Papa, and now he's taking Ella. Why doesn't she just die" Andra said as she ruffled her hair violently.

"Arghhh!! You should have just died, so I could be happy!" andra shouted with anger. He looked down, hiding his face on both knees.

Long enough Andra sank into her grief, recalling the old days when she was still best friends with Ella. Simple and innocent girl who always accompany her daily life. Her laugh, her genuine smile, and all the words and jokes Ella once gave her, are gone.

Now Andra can only regret stupidity, the girl he always guarded, apparently harbored wounds due to his actions. The girl who used to be there when she was down, now no longer cares. The pain is truly heartbreaking. Many times Andra closed his eyes, in order to hold the clear circle that had piled there. Sometimes he screamed and growled in annoyance to relieve his sick and claustrophobic heart.

After long enough lamenting the reality, Andra got up from her seat and walked towards the small table in the corner of the room.

Andra opened her drawer and picked up a pack of cigarettes and matches that she had stored there.

Actually Andra is not a smoker, he does it only when it is chaotic. He first smoked when his father left him and his mother. He repeated it when he was expelled from school. He felt that he was a useless child, because he had failed his mother.

Now, he's back touching that thing because of Ella. Ella's influence was huge in her life.

Andra started to light her cigarette and sucked it slowly. Enjoy the smell of nicotine that slowly enters the throat. Andra smokes her cigarette while sitting by the window of the room. Staring at the blazing sun that looked faintly from behind the curtains of his room.

A few minutes later, the cigarette that Andra smoked was gone. However, the burden on his heart was still not reduced, it was still as stifling as ever. Then Andra got up from her seat and stepped up to pick up the phone lying on the bed. Andra called someone, and before long the person she called came along carrying a few bottles of vodka. Andra accepted and invited the man to leave.

"It's been five years I've never touched this thing, Ella. But now, I'm back to touching it. You made me do this, Ella," Andra said as she looked at the bottle she was holding.

Then Andra opened the bottle and started gulping down its contents.

"Only this can help me forget you, El," Andra said, rubbing her face violently.

Then he gulped his drink back down to the toilet.

***

Kairi sat alone at the dining table while sipping a cup of black coffee she had just made.

He tries to relax his heart and mind, which was once chaotic after knowing that his best friend Ella is his own sister.

Kairi breathed out violently, a fate that was really funny, he thought at the time.

"It turns out the world isn't as wide as I thought. Gabriella, it turns out that part of your past is part of my past as well" Kairi said as she propped up her chin.

"You've loved Andra for a long time, I'm afraid it's Andra's turn to love you Gabriella. Ahh I hope it doesn't happen, but.Seeing Andra's gaze last night, I'm really scared of Gabriella" Kairi said alone.

Then he sipped his coffee back to the toilet, his head felt very itchy considering his relationship with Ella and Andra, a relationship that is quite complicated according to him.

"Hopefully fate will always be on my side" Kairi said, scratching her head.

Then he moved from his seat, when glancing at the clock in his hand already showed at 01.00 noon. He had to go to Juanda Airport to pick up his father who came from France.

Kairi snatches her car keys, and steps out of her apartment.

After almost an hour of travel, Kairi finally reached Juanda Airport. He waited for his father while standing near his car.

And shortly thereafter, Mr. Louis came to him.

"Papa." said Kairi while hugging his father.

"How are you doing, son?" asked Mr. Louis while patting Kairi on the back.

"I'm good Pa, Papa's good too right?" Kairi asked back while letting go of her embrace.

"I'm good too." replied Mr. Louis.

Then they both got into the car, and started driving away from the airport.

"Have you seen your mother?" ask Mr. Louis while looking at Kairi who is focusing on driving his car.

"Already." replied Kairi briefly, he recalled back about Ella's past.

"How's your mother doing?" ask Mr. Louis.

"Without me Mama is always good." replied Kairi.

"What do you mean Kai, is your mother still being rude to you?" ask Mr. Louis.

"No Pa. It's just that the answer is indeed like that, when I asked how he was." replied Kairi while looking at his father at a glance.

"Patience son, there will come a time when your mother will definitely change" said Mr. Louis, patting Kairi on the shoulder.

"I don't really expect Pa, because all this time I've had Papa who always loved me." replied Kairi with a smile.

"I'm sorry, Papa Kai, it was actually your mother who caused you to behave that way. Forgive Papa Kairi's mistake." Inner Mr. Louis while glancing at his ankana.

"Have you seen Gabriella's mother?" ask Mr. Louis to divert the conversation.

"Had it." replied Kairi briefly.

"How's it?" ask Mr. Louis.

"What?" Kairi asked back.

"It's true" said Mr. Louis.

"Yes." answered Kairi.

"You look lethargic, why? Everything's going well, isn't it Kai?" ask Mr. Louis while looking at Kairi. He felt something was wrong with his son.

"Current Pa, but not." replied Kairi while exhaling violently.

"Why Kairi? Your mother didn't give you your blessing? Your mother didn't accept Gabriella?" ask Louis seriously.

"Mama gave her blessing, and Mama also received Gabriella" Kairi replied.

"Then what's the problem?" ask Mr. Louis while frowning.

"Mama accepts Gabriella, because they already know each other. Gabriella also knows Andra Pa." said Kairi without turning her head, she focused on the road in front of her.

"A little know." replied Kairi. There was no way she could answer, Ella had loved Andra for seven years.

"If you just know, it's not a problem Kai" said Mr. Louis.

"Yes Pa, it's just that I didn't expect, if the woman I chose knew my family" Kairi said, trying to smile. He did not want his father to become suspicious, if he kept his lesion face.

Mr. Louis did not reply, smiling as he patted Kairi on the shoulder, encouraging and supporting his son.

"Tomorrow to come with Papa ya" said Mr. Louis after they were silent for a few seconds.

"Where?" ask Kairi.

"Walking to your mother." replied Mr. Louis.

"For what?" ask Kairi.

"There's something Papa wants to talk to him about. This is important enough, you and Andra should know too." replied Mr. louis firmly.

Kairi was a little surprised to hear his father's answer, what was the important thing?

Kairi wants to ask, but he breaks his intention, because his father picked up a phone from his business partner.

Shortly thereafter, Mr. Louis ended his phone call. He looked at Kairi with a sad look.

"You and Andra have grown up, it's time you knew the truth. Maybe this hurts you, but you should know anyway, so that you do not misunderstand again with our unjust attitude." Mr. Louis in his heart.

***

Dusk is far gone, the sun has returned to his contest with his royal rays. Now what is seen is the twinkling of stars, which are studded beautifully in the vast sky. Ms. Halimah was sitting alone in a chair, inside her shop. His eyes were on the street in front of his house. He was waiting for his son who went shopping for necessities tomorrow.

Ms. Halimah sat up while propping up her chin, her heart slightly agitated. Remembering this morning Andra visited his house with a happy face, but soon Andra pampit home with a lethargic, and sad face. Then after that, Ella locked herself in her room, all day she didn't come out at all. What happened, could they have fought?

"Mom!" call someone who suddenly stood near him, turns out Gilang. Apparently Ms. Halimah was too late in her daydream, not realizing that her son had returned.

"Mother why?" asked Gilang when he saw his mother gasped in shock when he called her.

"Mother is okay, just a little tired" replied Ms. Halimah.

"Then I take a break, let me take care of the shop" Gilang said.

"Alright, thank you son." said Ms. Halimah with a smile.

"Yes Ma'am." replied Gilang.

Then Ms. Halimah got up from her seat, and stepped towards her house. He did not go to his room, but went to Ella's room. Miss Halimah peeked at Ella from the crack of the door that happened to be slightly open. He saw his daughter sitting in a chair, near the window of his room.

"It seems like there really is a problem." said Ms. Halimah as she opened the door.

"El!" call Miss Halimah.

"Eh Mother." replied Ella a little surprised.

"May I come in?" asked Ms. Halimah who was still standing on the doorstep.

"Of course you can." replied Ella with a smile.

Then Ms. Halimah stepped in, and sat down at the bedside.

Ella was also sitting on the bed next to her mother.

"Why you?" asked Ms. Halimah while rubbing Ella's hair.

"I'm fine ma'am." replied Ella.

"Don't lie to Mom, I know you're in trouble. Come tell me the same Mother, do not be harbored alone" said Ms. Halimah while staring at her son.

Ella lowered her head, hesitating a little to tell about the problem she was facing. But he couldn't possibly hide this forever either.

"You quarreled with Andra, I saw she was very lethargic. What's up Ella?" Ms. Halimah asked again, because Ella was still silent without a word.

"Mother, it turns out.." said Ella.

"What's real?" ask Ms. Halimah, because Ella just hangs the sentence.

"It turns out Kairi is Andra's sister" Ella replied in a very quiet voice.

"Lho can? Isn't Kairi French?" asked Ms. Halimah while looking at Ella fixedly. He was shocked to hear Ella's reply.

"Iya Bu, because Kairi follows his French father, and Andra follows his Indonesian mother. Their parents divorced Mom, so they lived apart." Ella replied as she looked at her mother.

"Oh yeah, what are you thinking now? You already know Ms. Mirna, isn't it even good, so your relationship can get along quickly" said Ms. Halimah.

"It should be so Mom, but the truth is not that simple. Kairi and Andra's relationship is quite bad, as is Aunt Mirna's. And Kairi also knew, if I had ever been friends with Andra, and had loved her" Ella said, looking down.

"You've loved Andra, why didn't you realize it was Ella!" shouted Miss Halimah, she was very surprised to hear Ella's explanation.

"I'm sorry Mom son, all this time I've been busy with work, to not know what you're feeling. I should have been a place for you to complain, but the truth is that I never had time for you" Ms. Halimah said as she hugged Ella tightly.

"Mother is not wrong, it's only natural that I don't know, because I never told Mom. I'm ashamed to admit it, ma'am." said Ella, returning her mother's embrace.

"Ella, can't Kairi accept your past?" asked Ms. Halimah while releasing her embrace, she looked at Ella fixedly.

"Kairi can accept Mom, but.tadi Andra here, and said if all this time he loved me, only he was too late to realize his feelings. I'm afraid that if Kairi finds out, Mom, I'm afraid it's going to be bad for our relationship." Ella replied with a low head.

"Ella, why is it so complicated!" said Ms. Halimah while hugging Ella.

"I don't understand you either" Ella said softly.

"O Allah give the best way for my son" said Ms. Halimah in her heart.

***

The hour hand had shown at 09:00 p.m., but Andra had not yet returned, he was still in his apartment. He sat on the sofa holding his head which was painful and dizzy. I don't know how many bottles, vodka he spent. The empty bottle was seen lying on the floor.

Closing her eyes, Andra fumbled, trying to grab the vodka bottle on the table. After he managed to grab it, he again dipped it into the toilet, and threw the bottle just like that. Andra did not care whether the bottle would break or not.

Half-conscious and half-drunk, Andra faintly heard the voice of the woman who was calling her name. Her voice was exactly the same as Ella's, Andra sharpened her hearing, figuring out this was just an illusion or indeed real.

Shortly after, the door of his room opened. There was a beautiful woman wearing a light blue dress standing there staring at him.

Andra flinched in shock, it turned out that this was real not an illusion. With a stagger he got up from his seat, and tried to step closer to the woman.

"Andra, what are you doing?"

"Ella, it was really you" Andra said with a smile.

He moved closer and tried to touch her.

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