THE NO-MAN'S LOVE
9. WILLING TO BE UNLOVED
Maybe I should really get used to my husband's past that will continue to be revealed by the people around us. My heart must be strong, if it still wants to survive and fight to captivate its heart. Not in a bad way, but by doing something that will always make him remember and be attached to me. However, I also did not want to do all that just to get attention from him. I will do everything because I want to give my best as a form of respect and devotion of a wife to her husband.
***
“Oh, yes. They are very close friends. Friend one office.”
Egidia answered briefly and did not want to extend the discussion of the matter. He did not want his mood to turn cloudy this sunny morning. Instead, Tia felt bad for being presumptuous and offended her new neighbors.
“One more time I'm sorry yes, Egi. Really, I didn't mean anything by my question earlier.”
Tia had already changed their call with me and you, so that it sounded closer and familiar in the future.
“By the way, I'm glad Mas Gen got a beautiful and godly wife like you! You guys look very harmonious and equally eye-catching,” praise Tia later.
“May be happy always and last, yes!”
“Aamiin!” Egidia responded quickly and assured with sincerity and hope that the good prayer would be granted by the Most All.
The sound of the garage door being opened from Tia's house, made the two turn their heads in the same direction. There was a hijab-wearing woman like Egidia with a face similar to Tia, throwing a smile.
“Tia, I'm leaving!” Her voice was soft and soothing.
“Iya,” sahut Tia fast.
“Mbak, this is Mas Gen's wife. Beautiful, huh? Her name is Egi, Egidia.”
“Egi, he's my brother. Name's Mutia. We are orphans and only live together here.”
Before returning home, Tia still had time to introduce the two. The elder sister nodded and looked at Egidia kindly. Instead, Egidia replied courteously by clenching both hands in front of her chest, which was reciprocated with the same attitude by the woman whose profession could tell from the white coat she was wearing.
“Mbak Mutia is a doctor. Obstetrician. If I was, I would still continue my studies to earn a master's degree.”
Not meant to be arrogant, the woman as haired as a boat just want to tell her about her family what it is. Egidia simply nodded without wanting to reply.
“I have to go back first. Next time, we can talk and exchange stories for longer. Nice to meet you!”
Tia immediately crossed and opened the fence for the brother who had entered the car. Soon, the four-wheeled vehicle came out of the garage and drove slowly down the front road of their house, heading towards the residential gate.
For a while her mind was distracted by her busy life as a housewife. Because it has been used to be independent and do it since childhood, women who have removed the hijab enjoy their daily activities. Every now and then he hummed to drive away the quiet and comfort himself.
Two hours passed, Egidia finally finished everything and felt satisfied because the house already looked neat. The kitchen looks clean and dirty clothes have been washed and dried on the back.
He planned to prepare lunch even though it would only be enjoyed alone. However, feeling tired, the woman chose to go back to the room first and rest for a moment.
Time still shows ten o'clock. While resting, Egidia took the time to continue her writing. This time, according to her husband's message, she wrote on Genio's desk, waiting for his desk order to come tomorrow.
The woman closed her eyes and leaned comfortably on the existing swivel chair. It feels different, if you work with decent facilities. In the past, in his hometown he also had a simple table specifically for writing. However, her husband's desk is much nicer in terms of quality and functionality.
Thank you for letting me touch and use your stuff in this house, Mom. I know, you do it only for the responsibility, not for the feelings in your heart.
A bland smile seemed at a glance adorned the shady face of Egidia who always acted courteously and kindly to anyone. His initial intention to write a continuous story that had been anticipated by the reader was delayed because again he chose to write his daily notes.
If I can stay silent forever and give up, then I will continue to do so in order to be with you for the rest of my life. I am willing to be unloved, as long as my love for you is not forbidden to grow and develop as it is.
Some paragraphs are written as everyday expressions of the heart. Egidia was about to close her diary and turn to the job site, but suddenly her stomach felt very nauseous and wanted to vomit.
He walked quickly towards the bathroom with his right hand covering the mouth that already wanted to let out a bitter-tasting liquid. Arriving there, the woman finished everything until her face grew pale and breathing irregularly.
After gargling and washing her face, Egidia walked out in slow steps while fumbling against the wall. His body still felt weak, his head dizzy and his vision twitched.
The woman forced herself out and headed for the kitchen, to make a warm and sweet drink. He spent it little by little on the dining table, with his left hand supporting his head which was throbbing faster and felt heavy.
“What's wrong with me? Not usually like this,” murmured with his eyes closed tightly.
The warm drink made is quite potent and makes his stomach feel better, even though the pain does not go away at all. Egidia finished everything then washed the used glass, then walked slowly and returned to the room.
His main goal was the bed and he instantly laid down his weak body there. Because it was still not so comfortable, his position turned slanted and curled up. The left hand is folded to support the head, while the right hand still continues to rub the stomach that is problematic.
His pair of eyes closed tightly to neutralize the pain that was still felt. Because his body felt tired, he gradually fell asleep with a frown still holding back the pain.
In an instant, Egidia had a strange dream that suddenly appeared. He was approached by a glittering light that was getting closer to him, the more clearly the sound of a baby crying was very tight and did not stop.
Whose baby's voice is it and where is it? Why is there only a blinding light I see around me?
