Serra(Bloodless Wound)

SERRA

february 12 -13

My relationship with Rama is improving again, not knowing why we can do this. We fight and quarrel but we always try to get things done quickly.

Sometimes I selfishly want Him to be there for me but I also realize that I myself have a myriad of activities that I cannot stay or represent to other team members.

Rama is a perfectionist figure, in my eyes he is a firm personality. He always says what he likes and dislikes directly and clearly. Including me whose note is the closest person to him at this time.

Rama would scold me or even yell at me if I did something he thought was wrong. Sometimes many friends who accidentally see Rama angry will immediately ask why I just quietly treated so? where Serra who can always scold others can even finish all the affairs of the forum alone without the help of others to be silent and not a creature only on a Rama Pratama.

I have never denied if it was a mistake I did, but I will not be silent if it is all just slander. Not infrequently I choose silence just to wait for the anger and emotions of Rama stable, I understand very well the nature of Rama can not control his own emotions, if we deny it will increase the level of emotions increased. Not good for me and for Rama himself.

At first I lived this relationship with one purpose, I wanted to change a bit of Rama's hard person. I know personally he's actually good but I don't know why he could be. I often heard people outside gossiping about his attitude that seemed a little arrogant.

I want Rama to be a more sophisticated person again, I do not want to happen to my junior who became a different person because a problem happened to Rama. But there is something different about my heart.

The more I understand the nature of Rama, the more I become attached to him. I don't know what love is or what? all I know is that every time I want it. My mind is always full of it, every step of the way I'm always cautious I don't want to make him angry or disappointed. Because everyone knows our relationship.

I, who is famous for the affairs of the forum that is my responsibility, became an obstacle for me to freely step. Plus my relationship with Rama made me very careful to act. Before being with him I never thought of such a detail . But since the name of Rama always I take wherever I go the slightest possibility that makes him angry let alone embarrassed as much as I can avoid.

Honestly I never know how Rama feels about me, which I know unfortunately always adorn my days.

The message was in my memory, not only in my phone but always engraved in my heart and memory. Be enthusiastic in every task I do because He is always with me in my heart.

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february 14th

" Yank can tell a story but maybe this will hurt you Yank, but I can't lie to you. Sooner or later I have to say it."

" What? it seems serious."

" So serious, but I don't know where to start. Cause I know this is gonna hurt you, Yank."

" Tell me all Yank, tell me what you want to say."

" But this is gonna make you sick Yank."

" I'll hold it, I promise."

" Sure You are?."

" Relatedly I love, say."

" Huuf, Yank I'm sorry that I'm actually close to someone, it's time. But until now there has been no official status between us, rather I have not given him any status because I thought of you Yank."

I was silent, at first I thought Rama would tell me about the girls who had been close to him in this campus. Of course the girls who adorn the screenshot reports that come into me every day.

But it turns out this is more profound than I thought, I can't think normally. My world disappeared a second later. Energizing in my silence, hurt in my heart but what can I do?.

" I'm sorry, honey, how am I confused? honestly I love you same yank. But He came first among us and asked for certainty of his status. Tell yank how do I answer it?"

" All I leave to you, whatever decision you make, I'll accept Yank." (Serra)

" If I forbid it, it means I'm a bad man, 'cause it's hampering your future."

" So I assume you agree, Yank? I'm still there, I'm still missing but I'll probably rarely come."

" Let's ask for some time, honestly I'm not ready for any of this."

" Well, I still promise you a few more days to answer the girl."

°°°°°

There are not many words I can say, not many voices I can hear. I rebuked in my silence, I was crushed in my barrel. I don't know how to describe my current situation anymore.

Even the celebration event at my home was unable to be my solace, cooking which usually became my hobby even chaotic. Finally I chose to remain silent trying to make peace with my heart.

" I'm strong you said Yank, I have to do it for you, for your happiness. Just for you, my darling.

" Serr there is sponge material that you can buy, eh do not have to ask for money just let Ifa buy later."

" Where's the buy from yun?"

" I told Ifa Ser, you sleep there. That pale haven't eaten you yet?."

" No papa kok Mbak lack of sleep only time Ma'am, mahklum last night is rame children stay up late."

" Areally papa? yes already if the purchase in Mbak Sulas in the north there yes, if the south quality is not good."

" Yes Ma'am is ready, that's all or there's more to buy it."

" It's like, later if there is less Mbak telfone deh.

I left with a lunglai, I just wanted to find new air because the air in my house was already stuffy. First thirds I still remember the road, but a few moments later I don't know what happened, all I remember is slamming the steering wheel of the motor to the left and because in front of me there is a pick up car that is driving and unfortunately on the left parked a minibus like an angkot. After that I don't remember anything.

I woke up at exactly one o'clock in the afternoon, confused at the beginning of waking up like a dazed person. There was only my cousin brother sitting on a cell phone.

" Wes tangi (awake up)?" (The dwi)

" Nang endi I mas? want to buy a shop? (where am I mas? make it ketoko?)

" Gak duwe your crew, the car hit me. Sleepy turu wayae mala ngluyur!." (no your job, silent car hit. If you sleep while sleeping mala kluyuran!)

Already sick mala nagging, lucky because only my left hand is swollen. Pain but not felt.

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***TBC Genk's

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