Senior Beautiful Incaranku

Why is my fate like this?

Povs. Ayuna Maharani

BRAKKKK!!!!

I slammed the door strongly, when I saw her sitting quietly inside the house sucking on a skirt*k. It could be that he behaved normally like that, as if there was no sin or guilt at all. Looking at it like this, my emotions grew stronger.

"Ayuna, can't you go faster??"

Good looking at me, as if challenging my actions. Because I was at the peak of my emotions, I also served him. All right, I'm going to pour out all the grunts that are in this heart.

"Why are you coming home, huh??"

"Yuna, it wasn't you who told me to go home. You forgot??"

"Free, there's no point in you going home, Mom. It won't be able to change things and bring Dinda back!!!!"

I was really upset, so sorry I was back to shed tears. I would love to scratch and tear Mas Bagus face right now. Because I don't see the slightest regret from his face.

"Yuna, what do you mean??"

What kind of question is that? Did he pretend not to know that I had lost my son? He really is a great husband. I pared my initial intention to serve him, I chose to head into the room because my body was still tired and needed rest.

"Yuna, where's Dinda?" Mas Bagus pulled my hand, when I wanted to go into the room.

"In Semarang," I said accompanied by a cry of a mouthful.

"Why? Why did you take Dinda to Semarang?"

What kind of husband is this Mas Bagus, he is really insensitive or just being pretend? There are so many sins that I have accumulated due to too often cursing him. Oh, my God, I'm sorry.

"Go, Mom!!!"

I pushed Mas Bagus body firmly. I don't want to explain anything, because it all feels useless Mas Bagus will never understand.

"Yuna, I'm tired. Why don't you keep fighting, anyway?"

Mas Bagus let out a long sigh, scooping his face rough.

"I'm tired, I came all the way from Bandung, until your house even angry and struggling. Where is your conscience, Yuna??"

Why is Mas Bagus blaming me? Is this a trick to escape his mistakes? I also just came from far away, Mas, even further from Bandung.

"Mas, you realize? There is or is no you, just the same! I'm better off on my own."

"You digress, huh? Do you feel smart, because you can make money? You really are an ungodly wife!"

Mas Bagus' voice sounded bitter, could-can he call me 'durhaka wife'. Is he not aware, what kind of husband he is?

"Then what are you, Mom? Do you feel like a good husband, even though at the funeral of your own child you did not come??"

"W-what? A funeral??"

I hate to see Mas Bagus' face right now. In fact, my love has been covered by the magnitude of my hate. Again, God, I'm sorry.

"Ayuna, what happened to Dinda?"

"You nanya?? No use anymore, Mom. Dinda's gone, I'd better advise you doain Dinda, I hope she'll forgive you!!"

I can't take it anymore. I chose to go into the room instead of continuing to face Mas Bagus. It will only add to my sins again.

"LUCKYOOOO!!!!"

From the outside, Mas Bagus banged on the room door strongly. I still don't want to open it. I hope, if any of the neighbors hear of our dispute, they will understand it.

"Open the door, Yuna!!!"

It still sounds clear, Mas Bagus. But I prefer to stay still and cover my body with a blanket.

...****************...

In the morning, I came out of the room feeling very tired and needed to flush my body with water. Last night, I didn't take the time to shower and eat. I saw the wall clock showing at four in the morning, at least it was a good time for me to take a shower and get ready to work again.

"Yuna, why didn't you tell me about Dinda?"

That voice again, I thought this morning I could be free without a burden on my heart. But I was wrong, Mas Bagus still harassed me.

"YUNA, don't be so indifferent! I'm still your husband, aren't you afraid of sin? You stubborn!"

"You're a good husband, Mom. Thanks for letting me know."

"Yuna, I'm going to Semarang."

Let him go there, at least he looked at Dinda's red burial ground. Than not at all. Hopefully, Dinda understands the delay of this Papa.

Geck! Geck!

How many times do you hear knocking on the door. I abandoned my intention to go to the bathroom. Because there can't be a guest this early if it's not too important.

I gathered the courage to open the front door. I also prepared a shield so that I could remain patient with people outside. And sure enough when I opened that door, an uninvited guest had arrived.

"Good morning, we from the police received an order to arrest Mr. Bagus Prasetyo for drug use," while showing identification and a warrant, one of the men spoke firmly to me.

Like being struck by lightning in broad daylight, my heart broke into pieces. Is this the story of my life? What other temptation did God give me? I guess I really can't carry it anymore.

Mas Bagus dodged, but the three policemen immediately grabbed him, then handcuffed both hands.

I could only watch my husband's arrest. Can't do anything, because every mistake will get its reward.

"Yuna, is this what you want? Tega you!!"

Mas Bagus said as if to blame me again. Though I really did not know about the three policemen who came. Because I'm not the one who reported my husband to the police.

"Yuna, you will regret not releasing me,"

"Hurry way! If you want to give a statement, then come with us to the office!" The order of one of the police who arrested Mas Bagus in a loud voice.

My tongue feels numb, there are no more words I can say. Is this the beginning of my farewell with Mas Bagus?

Because I was asked to come to the police station, I asked Satria for permission to enter work a little afternoon. But I didn't tell you the truth, I didn't want to expose my family's disgrace. However, I had to close it tightly, even though I knew it sooner or later, one day everyone would know.

I was asked all sorts of questions by the police. The questions to be used to investigate the case of Mas Bagus. The police also brought me as a witness, lucky that I at least did not fall into the Mas Bagus case.

After I finished giving an honest statement, I turned to Mas Bagus. I was sitting right in front of Mas Bagus who now looks sluggish and lethargic.

"Yuna, do you hate me?"

"VERY!" I said sure, because right now I really hate him let alone his behavior.

"So, did you tell me to the police?" Good little whisper.

"No!"

"Don't lie, Yuna!!" Mas Bagus started to pull out his neck muscles, he spoke so loudly that some policemen turned their heads towards us.

"Can't you just keep blaming me, Mom? Why don't you accept this punishment as your own atonement?"

"Bad!" Mas Bagus was about to throw his hand at me, but I don't know what made him stop the action, even though I had put my face ready to take his second blow.

"Why didn't you hit me, Mom?"

"Ayuna, I'm trying to be patient, but you're getting more and more!"

"Heuh, you hurt me but you feel like you're hurting!"

I got up from my seat, saw the clock was getting late and I had to go to the office immediately. I decided to leave without saying goodbye with Mas Bagus. I think this is because I am still very upset with him.

"Yuna!!!"

That shout was not a hindrance, I still left Mas Bagus there.

Not happy for the arrest of Mas Bagus, but I am grateful that at least he will regret his actions and repent after getting this punishment.

Upon arrival at the office, I sat my body in a chair that I had not sat in for a few days. The situation in the room was so quiet, it turned out that it was time to rest. Maybe the whole lunch room.

I was really tired, not even my stomach was struggling at all even though since last night I did not consume anything but water.

Tired of my heart, mind and body this can no longer be expressed. Especially if I remember about Good. Everything about him hurts me so much. Everything about him makes me more fragile and broken. Why is my fate like this?

Again, I shed tears and cried silently in a room where there was no one but myself. Son, Dinda. If you remember him, this tightness keeps on crashing in my chest. Again, I feel like I have failed at being a good mother.

I lifted my head up, hoping the tears would not flow again. But it was in vain, so I decided to cover my face with both hands. My crying is getting worse. Anyone who has experienced, would know what it feels like to cry without a sound, it hurts more.

After feeling tired and quite, I opened both palms from my face. But my eyes festered at once to see someone who had been standing in front of me by offering me a bottle of drink.

"Drink,"