Senior Beautiful Incaranku

The lies that are exposed

Povs. Ayuna Maharani

I thought after my marriage with Mas Bagus would bring a happy household ark. It turns out I was wrong, for six years I had a long distance relationship while still dating, up to two years of our marriage, in fact, our situation has not changed despite having a daughter.

Mas Bagus, he prefers to keep working in his old office outside the city, precisely in the city of Bandung. Once a week he will only return to visit me and Dinda Putri Prasetya, our baby who is currently one year old.

Sometimes, when the old date Mas Bagus did not go home for reasons of money that was limited. Sad, but what else? I work in Jakarta while Mas Bagus in Bandung. That's a pretty time-consuming distance, isn't it?

For now, no one has relented between the two of us to give up our jobs, because we work together as long-time employees in their respective companies. In addition, there are many other things that we are considering.

"Yuna," called Mas Bagus when he had just finished his bath after a few minutes ago arriving from Bandung.

"Emmm..," I only answered faintly in a slightly whispering voice because Dinda was currently sleeping and I had closed my eyes.

"Yuna .." call Mas Bagus again by shaking my arm.

"Yes, Mom," I replied lazily. Honestly, at this time I was feeling very sleepy and did not like when Mas Bagus had to disturb my sleep.

"Yuna, ngadep here. I miss you!" Mas Bagus started to pull my body and hugged me from behind as my current position was on his back and facing towards Dinda.

"Mas, I'm sleepy!"

Obviously I know what Mas Bagus really wants from me. I am not lazy, nor do I want to serve my husband. I am currently coming by the moon. Because I have KB. It makes my menstrual cycle not smooth. Moreover, the pain that often comes arise, not because it feels.

"Hm ... " Mas Bagus breathed a long breath, it seems like Mas Bagus is starting to get annoyed at me.

"Do not apply if you menstruate again" said Mas Bagus.

I choose not to continue my words, not once twice, even repeatedly I have argued with Mas Bagus because of this problem and eventually we will fight.

Mas Bagus is patient, but for this one problem he is very sensitive. He never wanted to know any reason, which he even assumed if I didn't like him anymore. He also accused me of being bored of him, so as not to serve him.

At midnight, Dinda whined for milk. As a worker, I did not give ASI to my son. I prefer formula milk. It's not that I don't love children or fear that my body will change shape, but I think this is the right choice because since the age of Dinda two months, my ASI no longer come out.

Mas Bagus also woke up and made milk for Dinda, but Dinda was dissatisfied by the milk made by Mas Bagus. Whether because it was too hot, or lacking in size, I didn't know that Dinda would often throw her milk bottle and cry instead.

"Ndaaak .." whined Dinda while throwing her milk bottle.

Though I have repeatedly explained to Mas Bagus, if making milk for Dinda do not get too hot and the dose should be five spoons for one bottle of milk. Finally, I always made milk for Dinda.

"Mama," whined Dinda again with her sedu.

"Dear, it's Mama who made it."

I feel annoyed at Mas Bagus, because there is him or not fixed me who takes care of our son. Though if he comes home this is a chance for me to rest a little at night. I hope he will replace me while taking care of Dinda after five full days of me taking care of her.

Not that I feel burdened with taking care of Dinda, but I just want cooperation between the two of us to take care of her.

Sometimes mas Bagus even call me 'the same calculation of husband' because I always ask him to take turns taking care of Dinda if on holidays.

I was disappointed, angry, emotional, when Mas Bagus branded me as the wife of reckoning. Lah, he just constantly plays cell phones and spouts his cigarette smoke every day. Who is actually counting here? It seems obvious, doesn't it?

I'm not a patient woman, I'm a very emotional woman. It is not like in the movies that continue to obey the husband. Seeing her foot barges I felt jealous. Jealous of not being able to give his free time to me and my son.

Yes, he did work for me and Dinda. But, I also worked extra for Dinda and herself. After all, if I just relied on his salary maybe I wouldn't be able to pay for Dinda's house rent and nanny. Not arrogant or not good at being grateful for being able to earn by yourself, but all this for the sake of children and help husbands to meet our needs.

I work too, Mom? I also want to relax for a while after almost a full week of childcare and work. Not to mention having to clean the house and cook. Children also need attention from you, but instead of playing with children, you are busy yourself with the goddamn phone. Even the cell phone sleeps always in front of him.

Only my mind keeps nagging. Is it possible that this scolding of mine will one day explode? It's probable. If Mas Bagus does not change and continue to be comfortable with his attitude.

But what power, rather than my abandoned and inattentive son, I'd rather give in. When Mas Bagus is at home, I prefer to take my son to play outside or to the neighbor's house.

...****************...

Sunday afternoon, Mas Bagus will be getting ready to return to Bandung. He cleaned his bag and other equipment. That is how our lives are every day. Sunday night Mas Bagus came home, even Monday night he had to go back to Bandung.

"DRTAJT ......DRRRTT ....."

I heard that Mas Bagus's phone doesn't stop vibrating. Yes, to my knowledge as his wife for two years, Mas Bagus did not ever give a tone call for his phone. Just a vibration, for reasons I don't know. Because I never fiddled with his phone. And vice versa, we hold a firm belief in each other.

"Mas, Hapedya, tuh! There's a phone like," I'm a little high-sounding because Mas Bagus is in the bathroom.

"Don't, justin!" answer Mas Bagus.

But a nice mobile phone just keeps vibrating, so I can't wait and take it right out of the bag. I'm just worried if it's an important call or emergency.

When the call with the unknown number I answered, there was no one there.

"Hallo, halllo .. "I also chose to put back the phone Mas Bagus.

But when I wanted to put the phone down, I saw a little black bag that I thought was so foreign.

I ventured to pick up that little bag, even though it looked presumptuous. But this is to make my curiosity pay off.

I opened it too. And how surprised I was after knowing what it was.

Angry, disappointed, sad mixed into one. I never thought that I would find the things that used to be used to wear forbidden objects in my husband's bag.

"Yes, God ... "

I could no longer hold back the anger within me. Only the words of forgiveness that I keep mentioning endlessly. I wish God would forgive me, my husband too.

Tight and limp, when I assumed my husband was okay. It turns out that my guess is wrong, it deserves all our savings money ludes somewhere, the monthly money from him was getting reduced, even this two months Mas Bagus only gave me a quarter of his salary. Or if it is only about five hundred thousand rupiah a month. Where are the remaining five million??

"Yuna??" call Mas Nice to me.

"who's calling?"

"This is what, Mas?"

I didn't answer the question. I showed the forbidden object I found before him with anger and emotion.

"Mass? So you're actually using the drugs??" My guess.

"Yuna, this is nothing,"

Mas Bagus tried to reinsert the black bag that I had found, but I immediately grabbed it and threw it in any direction.

"Mrs ... "

Dinda also pointed to the thing I had thrown, he tried to reach her. But I took it right away, because I didn't want my son's eyes or body to be contaminated with the unclean stuff.

"Mas, aren't you afraid of sin?? Is it because of this thing our savings money abis? Is it because of this that you have reduced the monthly allowance for your child and wife?!!"

With reddened eyes and clear water, I poured my anger on Mas Bagus.

"Yuna, it's not that." Good man seemed to be unable to explain anything. And I know that if he's acting like that, it's a sign that he's guilty.

"I'm disappointed in you, Mom!!"

I held Dinda, and brought the thing for me to throw away. With a sobbing, Dinda continued to watch me without a word. This time she may know that her mother is not okay.

"Yuna!!!" Call Good out loud.

"What else, Mom? What else do you want to talk about?"

I can't stand Mas Bagus' attitude. He acted against me. What else after I found out if Mas Bagus is now using prohibited items. Anyone would know what severe punishment was received if using that item.

"Don't because you work, you're a wife who volunteers with your husband!" Mas Bagus still spoke in a high tone.

I really don't understand why Mas Bagus said this, does he just want to make a diversion at the core of our previous conversation?

"I don't mean to fight you, Mom. You made me act like a gini, you mean me to keep understanding you, look now, Mas?,"

Mas Bagus still put on his angry face. While I can no longer hold back the tears that have been blocked since. Not to mention the crying of Dinda that makes me more dizzy.

"Yuna, this isn't what you think it is. Shocked me first," pinta Mas Bagus with a soft tone.

"What am I supposed to do, Mom? You want to say if you really make that medicine, right?"

I've been annoyed, Mas Bagus may never know how my anger if it comes out.

"Yuna, I'm khilaf ..."

"So, you ..."

I couldn't stand it anymore, my body staggered and fell on the floor. Fortunately, Dinda who is still in my sling can hold.

"Ayuna, this is just a distraction. I will not make anymore" said Mas Bagus full of regrets.

It may sound regretful, but I don't know if my husband is dependent on the drug or not.

"You're nyesel?"

I looked into Mas Bagus' eyes sharply. I wonder how he reacted.

"YES" said Mas Bagus softly accompanied by a small nod.

"Keep, where's our savings?"

"Yuna, the money's gone. I don't know,"

"YOU LIED!!!" My serge.

I know, after this Mas Bagus will continue to lie and lie again to cover up some of his other lies. My confidence is not only here, I also question about him to move to work and find another job in the same city as me.

"Down your job, move and find another one in Jakarta!"

"Yuna, that's not the case. I've worked there for a long time, I don't feel good about a boss who has believed in me for years,"

True to my guess, Mas Bagus rejected my wish. The reason is still the same. Not good with his boss.

"You're not good with your boss, but you're acting like a wife!"

I deliberately challenged Mas Bagus, I wonder what he will defend. Her job is in Bandung, or she chose to come with me in Jakarta.

"Yuna, we can talk about this later. I know your mood is hot, can not be compromised," Mas Bagus hugged my body slowly. He took Dinda from my lap.

"Dinda, Papa left first," Mas Bagus kissed Dinda's cheeks and forehead slowly. Send the message as usual if he is going to work.

"I want us to finish our conversation, Mas!" I prevented the departure of Mas Bagus. I suspect this was just to avoid our topic of conversation.

"Goddessa! Just try it once you're following me!!!"

Mas Good put Dinda in my lap again. This time he started to get emotional again.

"I'm not a submissive woman, especially with a husband who keeps lying to me!"

PLAQUE!!!!!

The first time, this face got a hard slap from my own husband. The heat on this face is still inferior to the pain in my heart. It's okay, I'm trying to be stronger. I'm powerful. I'm not as weak as he thinks.

From there, I was determined and absolutely determined to fight it. Maybe I will be called a disobedient wife, but I don't care because I'm not the type of woman who can only cry when hurt and my pride continues to be trampled on.

The sound of Dinda's crying echoed throughout the room, I chose to wake up and calm her down first.

"Yuna," called Mas Bagus by pulling my hand.

I didn't care, I threw out his hand and went into the room and closed the door.

Since then, I don't want to talk to Mas Bagus anymore. Not because of his slap alone, it seemed like there were still many other unexpected things that Mas Bagus had hidden from me.