Muhasabah Love

Namira

"Why do Mom and Dad lie to me? Dad said Malik was alive, and my son was alive. But they don't exist, do they?" Namira said while unable to hold the clear water in her eyes to come out.

"Mira..." Her speech.

"Even Mom justifies what dad says.. She lied to me, too." Namira Protest.

"I'm sorry Namira's mother.. I'm doing this for your own good, son.." Reveal Mother.

"Killness? What kindness? No lying is good. Lying is sweet in front of you, but it will hurt if you know the truth.. Why the mom?" Sluggishly. Hanifah hugged her daughter. Hanifah's heart also felt pain when her son was sad like that.

"I'm sorry, Mother.." His words are also soft.

****************

Still in the same condition. Namira sat quietly on her bed looking at something empty. Namira looked to be smiling to herself. Before long, Hanifah came to deliver food to Namira's room. Because Namira is still happy to be in the room. Namira looked daydreaming and his vision also looked blank. Hanifah put the food in the room drawer.

"Namira. I've prepared food for you. You eat, son.." Say Mother.

"Mom soon.. Namira waited for Malik to come home." Namira said.

"Namira.. Malik doesn't exist.." Hanifah reminded.

"Who says Malik has no mom? Mas Malik was there. earlier he said cooperation I. mas Malik said, if Mas Malik today there are patients who must be treated.. I'll be home soon too.." Her speech. Hanifah just shook her head. Then Hanifah immediately left Namira's room.

Hanifah leaned her body against Namira's bedroom door. Hanifah could not hold back her tears. Which mother's heart does not hurt if she sees her beloved daughter slumped like that. Even the conditions are not possible. Namira seemed to have lost consciousness.

"Yes, God.why is my son like this now?" He said softly while staring at the ceiling of the house.

****************

Someone is opening the door to Namira's room. Namira turned to the door. Namira smiled to see who was coming. Yes, it is her husband. Malik smiled at Namira. So did Namira return her husband's smile.

"Mas Malik.." said Namira. Namira walked closer to Malik. And Namira hugged Malik.

"Mas... Where have you been? I was waiting for you. mas.. Why not answer? Mas.. don't leave me again. mas..." Namira Whine. Malik just smiled not answering Namira's words.

"Namira.this isn't Malik.but your father.." Hanifah's words suddenly awakened Namira's view. Namira was surprised by what was seen in front of him.

"I'm sorry, yeah.." Namira.

"Namira's.. Malik's gone, son, please let Malik go.." Said Father. Namira shook her head and denied her father's words.

"Dad say what dad? Malik is still alive, he has not come from the hospital.. Malik will be back.." Namira. Suddenly Namira's ears heard the sound of the doorbell of the house. And Namira says that it's her husband.

"That's got to be Malik.. I opened the door for him first.." Namira said as she ran to open the door. Hanifah and Abdullah followed Namira and called him.

"Namira wait! Don't you open the door, son.." Hanifah.

However, they were unable to chase him. Namira opened the door. It turns out that there is nobody outside. Namira looks disappointed.

"Well.Why aren't there people? I thought Malik was coming home.." Sad talk. Hanifah then approaches Namira and invites Namira to enter her room. Hanifah told Namira to just rest.

.

.

"Please ma'am. Let me think about the solution first.." Abdullah said calmly.

The more days, Namira's condition is getting no better. Namira's hallucinations are becoming more and more. Hanifah is increasingly worried about Namira's situation.

"Mas Malik... You have come home, mas, when will we go back to our house again? I don't live here anymore.. Dad always said that you weren't there.The proof is that you're still here." Reveal it. In Namira's eyes, Malik is alive and always present to Namira. From behind the door, Hanifah and Abdullah saw Namira's condition. Namira is seen talking to herself and playing by herself.

.

.

Every day Hanifah and Abdullah felt hurt by Namira's condition. In fact, it looks Namira is hugging a bolster that is her husband.

                     *****************

Umi Sharifah came again to Namira's house. I want to know how Namira is doing right now. After Hanifah told Namira's true condition, Umi Sharifah also cried.

"Why is Namira like that now? What exactly is going on?" Ask Umi Syarifah.

"Namira has lost a man who loved Umi very much.." Hanifah cannot continue the story

"I mean ustadzah?" Tanya Umi Syarifah curious.

"It happened about two months ago umi. an accident claimed the lives of husband and prospective children in Namira's womb. At first Namira did not know that her husband and son were gone. But after knowing everything, Namira became like this. She continued to hallucinate and thought that her husband was still alive." Hanifah Story. Umi Syarifah shook her head. I felt sorry to hear what Namira was going through.

"What are your plans then?" Tanya umi Sharifah's.

"The plan is we want to take Namira to a psychiatrist. And for a while we wanted to leave Namira there." Hanifa.

"What would you do to put Namira there?" Umi Syarifah.

"Honestly, Umi.. Which mother would have if her child was put in that place, but this forced Umi.. " Hanifah.

"If allowed, Namira better come with me to the boarding school again. I had agreed with Kiyai to take Namira there.. Namira's there to be treated soon." Umi Syarifah.

"Wouldn't it trouble Umi and kiyai?" Hanifah.

"God is not an ustadzah.. Namira we think of as our own son.. God willing, we will take care of Namira until she is healed.." Umi Syarifah.

"I had a meeting with my husband Umi.." Hanifah.

"Ustadzah Hanifah does not need to worry.kiyai has been deliberating with ustad Abdullah.. And hopefully ustad Abdullah will allow.." Umi Syarifah.

"What Umi Syarifah said is true, ma'am, kiyai asked permission to father. And you've agreed that Namira is taken to the boarding house. Now just wait for permission from Mom.." Abdullah.

"If you agree.. I agree too sir.. " Said Hanifah.