LIFEWEAR

I LOVE HIM BUT HE'S STILL IN HIS PAST

days pass very quickly in every second of life.just walk away from all the past and present the future.all has become a vision and destiny that has been outlined. that time will go on without being able to return and will not repeat itself.

******

after the wedding day cahyo, and they returned to east Java again.all went as usual.but different, it appears that pak rudi and bu desi remained in east java for a while. it seems that Desi ma'am is still at home there so rudi decided to stay.

"mother's job in Jogja isn't papa's in staying?" said the goddess that day.

"mother's work still goes even without mother. mother is still at home here. let alone accompanied you. lonely mother in jogja there are no friends who can be invited to tell stories like you." ms. Desi replied honestly expressing what she felt.

"goddess also seneng mother here. so there is a quiet temen. if the mother is not here.kan mbak nani is still on leave." said the goddess with a smile.

they continue to chat while feeding the fish, sometimes laughter intersperses their time.

"what did you do first?" ask missi

"i used to ramen on the beach ma'am." answered the plain goddess.

"do you sing nduk?" asked the desi mother again while looking at the goddess seriously

"yes can ma'am I used to work what bu other than ngamen." replied the goddess still innocently.

"do you have family?" ask mom desi again. now look serious and in reply to the head.

"no ma'am, the goddess lives alone. Mr. rifky who helped me and asked to come to work with him. that's why whatever his request I must follow. as a return for his kindness to me." the goddess with her sweet smile.

"that boy is somehow made of what his soul is." bu desi grumbled while staring far away at the fish-sorting rifky," even himself the owner of this company still wants to do the job."

"yes ma'am, she is indeed amazing." praised the goddess.

"do you like it?" mommy desi asked me something more serious.

"yes there is no way mom. I am who he is. yo mboten pas bu (yes not fit)" said the goddess blushed embarrassed.

"likes it don't look at nduk."

"yes but it can't be bu hehehe" said the goddess with a cry.

hearing that answer, it was as if the mother desi understood the heart of women because she was also a woman. the goddess who was in the arms of the desi bu felt as if she felt the warmth of a mother's embrace that she had never felt. For the first time the tears came out of the goddess who indeed missed a mother's embrace.

"why cry nduk?" ask mom desi wonder.

"the mother's embrace is warm. the goddess feels peace." she wrote.

"think me your mother nduk. nduk papa. I'm your mother although not the one who gave birth to you" said bu desi make the goddess more moved by the attitude of bu desi.

"immeasurably bu" said desi again drifting in a warm embrace bu desi.

"i will try to perfect your happiness nduk" said the mother desi in her heart.

the atmosphere seemed to be as breezy as the soothing wind as if it could not beat the soothing scenery.

*******

days passed, busyness, and all the smell of work had crept down every inch and curve of the body drenched in sweat.

a week has passed since that day.the wheel of life and all phases run as usual.it's just that the afternoon was seen in a beautiful landscape.bright scenery and the wind that blows like a dime.

"it is enough for me to see your smile, admire you without you knowing." said the goddess while smiling to enjoy the beautiful taste in her heart.

meanwhile, looking in front of the mes in a relaxing place bu desi and pak rudi look at it all. they smile to see what he saw. soon after it looks bu desi pensive and...

"kasian boy sir. only dare to save what he felt." said bu desi while looking at the goddess who was observing rifky.

"yes ma'am, if only rifky knew all this" said mr. Rudi also the same while watching rifky work.

"i know very well the feeling of the goddess sir. stepped he did not dare. he could only realize all the goodness of rifky. who thought it was just that." lamented bu desi who was greeted nodding pak rudi. later,

"later you talk to rifky. it's time he also has a family.it should also be he can move on. and I'm sure there is no woman who stopped in his heart. let me slow down you say." break up Mr. Rudi while sipping coffee.

******

when the heart is late in the afternoon, when all the creatures leave his busy life.when everyone starts to rest relieve his fatigue.when the sun starts to come down and wave his hands. looks rifky sitting on the beach under the tree pines where he used to unwind.

"just ky himself" reprimanded rudi sir who came to him.

"yes sir, enjoy an afternoon like this it feels peaceful." welcome rifky while shifting.before long appeared bu desi with the goddess carrying a tray of coffee and snacks.

"less complete ky if without this." said bu desi while showing coffee. meanwhile the goddess prepared a mat.

"wah this is a very compact mother child." serobot pak rudi while winking at the rifky.

"wah wah there is a wind what is this tumben" said rifky with a smile.

"yes let the more complete aja ky. mumpung atmosphere support. yes ndak sir?" said bu desi while glancing towards the goddess.

they were hypnotized by the story and the soothing atmosphere of twilight.joking, laughter and a little serious conversation filled the time.until when the day began to crumble, it seemed that the conversation was getting serious.

"ky, me and your best friend are happy.when will you catch up?"

"seeing you guys are happy I'm definitely very happy sir." rifky repeated the same answer.

"are you going to keep going like this? don't you torture your heart.Say there is a girl who can fill your heart right now?"

"no sir," replied the short rifky.

"i.e., there's a girl who wants to accompany you and be your companion, do you want ky?" mr. Rudi's question began to lead with the core.

"i don't know sir, maybe this body can accept my heart, I don't know. I'm afraid to disappoint. that's why I chose to remain alone until this moment." it was clearly rifky who strengthened that his heart was still left behind in his mass.

"is that hurt?" the goddess interrupted

"no, I don't feel pain.just I haven't been able to forget the seconds with him." explains rifky again.

the atmosphere returned silent without a word that was able to break the roar of the waves and the beach breeze that afternoon.the atmosphere was completely frozen and very very very frozen.all the questions have been one conclusion. that rifky is still left behind in its mass.

until the time when Azdan magrib reverberated, there was no meaningful conversation anymore and they moved to return to the mes where they rested.

on the way, the goddess steps slowly.the inner flying towards the voice of the heart.

"let this taste also accompany me mas, I am happy to see your smile.even though my heart is not able to touch your heart.I love you mas even though your heart is still left in your mass." inner goddess with tears that began to flow at the corner of her cheek.

seriate,