DOOR NO.7

Eps. 14 - Start to change

May has arrived. Enter in May jakarta continues to rain. People pass by wearing umbrellas and raincoats. I sat on a bench upstairs in the villa looking around the complex.

It turns out that the rain has just been rained this way Jakarta is already vulnerable to flooding. I saw people having trouble crossing every saddle of water.

Phytos usually like nelfons, but now they add up to the night.

Each phone is also not long, at most only half an hour.

I still wake her up every morning.

Only difference now there is no continuous news.

Honestly, tonight my longing is growing. I tried to call him. And it turns out it's on another call.

"Who's phone is she tonight?"

My mind is in my heart.

I don't want to bother about that. I flicked myself by folding clothes that were already dry.

Then fito phone.

"Hallo neng"

"Yes hello"

"So again mamah's phone"

"Oh yaudah gapapa"

"You're asleep, it's night"

"He's gonna sleep again"

"Yaudah, met malem yes dear"

"night"

I also smiled a little. There is a deep sense of disappointment. I was so excited when he called. I wanted to tell you about my work, about what happened at the villa, and how I was doing. But yasudah..

Day after day I went through with less and less news. I'm chatt's prestige first.

Every morning, I wake her up. After that there are no more words of encouragement such as do not forget to eat, his work spirit, and other things that make this relationship closer.

I used to stay away because of an unresolved relationship.

But what's with me moving away he should come away too?

A woman's heart is hard to guess, and can change quickly.

In my mind, I want this relationship to continue to be fought.

This is the beginning of a problem that does not know when it will be solved.

Because I couldn't resist the longing, I tried calling fito at 10 p.m.

At 10 o'clock, Fito was home from work. But again be on another call.

Jealousy, suspicion began to run from the heart.

Bad thoughts began to run through my mind.

I chatt him :

"Co in another call continues? who's nelfon again?"

".................."

"Do I not get answered? Who's nelfon again?"

"................."

"I've had it if I was bothering."

My heart whispered :

"Sleep,

Because when you fall asleep, you won't miss anyone, and you won't feel pain.

Do not forget to pray, hopefully everything that happens today, will be beautiful tomorrow"

...********...

The next day I woke up at 9 a.m. Because I'm on holiday today.

I busied myself cleanly in the villa and watered the plants.

There was one rose that started to wither, I tried to approach it and then water it.

Roses as beautiful as this can wither if no one takes care of them.

The rose is like being left by its owner.

Then, I compare the state of this rose with my heart. The fate is almost the same.

Not spirit and fragile because the owner has not taken care of him as usual.

Not feeling, my tears dripped and fell right at the root of the flower.

The rose withered the more I saw.

I'm trying to see HP, hoping there's a message coming in from the fito. But there's no..

Is this how quickly he throws away his love?

The more days the person I wait for just to hear his voice is not there at all. He really has changed. I check her contacts often. I saw online. But he didn't have to call me or say good night.

I feel like a stranger.

In the evening, I tried to play again the kangen kite song that he had sung for me.

Lyric by lyric I always listen to it with great interest.

There was one lyric that made my heart poisoned with an overwhelming sense of longing. That is :

"Which heart can withstand longing, when far away it is impossible to sleep soundly"

That's how kira is.

Without news from him, appetite began to feel bad and life was not good. I don't know what happened to this relationship.

Fito kept me quiet for a few days. Until finally I silenced him.

I don't know how to ask the news. Just like I hay it feels like this finger feels heavy typing it. I once tried typing a message to say "good night", but I deleted it again, I was afraid he did not reply to my message or my message was answered with a sentence that made my heart disappointed.

I'm re-enacting memories after memories 8 months ago. It feels like I jumped back into the past and protested with what is happening now.

Tonight I let my head go under my pillow, not to forget the doll that fito gave me on my birthday, I always hug. Doesn't feel a little wet because of the tears that keep dripping.

I miss the candle tonight

I miss his smile

I miss her eyes that always shine radiating a longing desire that can not be denied with anything.

I miss everything about him..

I realized that I had really fallen for him..

Oh my goodness, is this heart?

True said dilan, longing is heavy......!