Young Mother President Lian [Revised]

Chapter 30 - Dreaming

The man in the gray suit, staring in wonder at the mother's grave, was a bouquet of flowers that had just been placed there, from looking at the flower Han could already guess if it was the flower his sister used to love when she visited the Mother.

“it looks like your son visited you today” said Han who has now sat on the side of the mother's grave.

He looked at the Mother's grave with a sad look while putting down a stalk of the mother's favorite flower a blue tulip.

"lately I've been visiting your grave a lot, I know Kaira's tomb is not far from Mom's, suddenly I miss her a lot, it's been three years but the memories with her never leave me, today is her birthday and remains the day of Mother's death too, the day goes so fast that it was not felt already seven years ago Mother left me”

Han paused for a moment to wipe away his tears, then continued on.

“Mother, I really miss you a lot, although I am not your real child but you never distinguish me from Sean, you are a good Mom, because of you too I can be a doctor”

“Mom remember I told Mom about a girl who looked a lot like Kaira? The girl's name is Lisa, she's very similar in nature to Keira and at first glance her face is also similar to Kaira, you know? That girl loves me-”

“but I still hesitate to say if I love her too, I'm afraid if it's just a pseudo-feeling, I know for myself how I feel about Kaira, until this moment I still love Keira-”

“after pondering all this, I thought that if I only thought of Lisa as Kaira, I could not love Lisa with Keira Mother's shadow, I had also hurt the girl's feelings, too, I'm really not worthy of her Mother”

“is there any chance that I can love Lisa completely and live with her Mom?” said Han who smiled grimly, wanting to feel like he was laughing at himself, how could Han think like that!

“well, I have to go visit Kaira, it's nice to be able to talk about this with Mom, I'll visit you again later”

Han began to step into the tomb of Kaira which is not far from Mother, Keira's tomb is in Block C.

Soon Han was standing in a tomb that read the name “ Park Lee Kaira ”.

Han educated himself to remain beside Kaira's tombstone, Han smiled very sweetly as he stared at the lover's tomb, he also started to throw away the leaves that covered the tombstone, after that give a bouquet of red roses.

“what are you happy, baby? I miss your laugh so much, happy birthday dear, I wish I could make your departure, you know I'm still wearing our engagement ring, this ring is like not wanting to get out of my hand or maybe I who have not been able to forget it” speech that sees the ring with the words “your mine” and silver.

“how can I let go if when you leave you insist on bringing it buried with you-”

“Kaira, it's been three years since you left me but why can't I let go yet, you went to take heart but you left me a wound, Keira it's not fair to me! I also want to live happily even if not with you”

“my time is up, sorry can't be longer, I'll be back later baby, see you, I love you”

Han rose from his position and began to step away from the beloved's tomb.

Han chose to return to the hospital, something Han wanted to tell Doctor Park. To get to the hospital takes about two hours drive, considering the distance of the tomb and the hospital is very far.

Han arrives at the hospital very late at sunset, before heading to Park's doctor's room, Han takes the time to see Lisa's state. 'she looks good'

After seeing Lisa, Han immediately went to Park's doctor's office.

“Han?” said Park's doctor who was surprised to see Han on the doorstep.

“where have you gone? Three days you disappeared without news,”

“Master Park, is it true? If Lisa's next week is going to be operated on?”

“Yes, you will be involved for Lisa” surgery, said Dr. Park.

“but-But--Tuan Park,”

“Han, how long will you avoid the operating room? Are you still thinking about my daughter?”

“Tuan Park, I beg you not to scare me, enough Kaira---, ”

“Han, that incident was three years ago, did I not say if it was not your fault, it has become the destiny of God and I have mengikhlaskan Kaira”

Doctor Park walked over to Han who was sitting on the sofa, “you haven't been able to forget about Kaira? Han I told you to stop thinking about Kaira, didn't I? you also have a life and you deserve to be happy, if you're like this I'm sure Kaira is also unhappy there”

Park's doctor's words made Han aware of one thing, 'he deserves to be happy', Han immediately pondered all of that, 

'so all this time Kaira wasn't happy to see me like this?'

“Han, you are like my own son, from today take off the engagement ring, let go of Kaira and try to open my heart to others, it has been enough three years of your devotion to Keira and also this hospital”

“you can reflect on all that, come back later before Lisa's surgery is carried out, I'm sure you can Han, I have to go to Lisa's room to take her blood sample” said Doctor Park, who was involved in the surgery, before leaving she rubbed Han's hair.

"thank you Doctor Park”

Now there is only Han in the doctor's room Park, in the room there are many photos of Kaira on each wall and also the table Doctor Park, himself and Doctor Park are both alone in this mortal world.

If Doctor Park has lost his wife and daughter, then just doesn't have anyone in the world, Han isn't Sean's father's son, Han's just the orphanage they adopted as a child, if they don't nurture maybe Han's fate is the same as Doctor Park who lives a long time ago.

“I have to how Kaira” said Han, he leaned his body onto the sofa, his body felt so tired, it had been two days Han could not sleep well.

Before long, drowsiness approached Han, Han slowly began to close his eyes and began to fall asleep on the sofa.

In the dream Han .....

There was a white mist suddenly approaching Han, making his gaze blurry, but the gust of wind blowing the white mist turned into all the gardens filled with lavender flowers.

Han's gaze was fixed on a girl wearing a white dress that was behind her, making it hard to see her face.

“Han ..”

The girl called Han but did not want to look at her.

Han only fell silent after hearing that voice, that voice ... The voice that someone Han missed so much. Not waiting for long Han immediately ran up to the girl in white dress who was in the middle of a stretch of lavender flowers.

“Han...” said the girl who now looks back, the girl showed her face as Han was running towards her.

“I miss you so much, Kaira” said Han, the man immediately hugged Kaira very tightly, when Han was already in front of him.

“I miss you too, Han”

“Kaira, if this is a dream I hope I never wake up again”

Kaira who heard that tried to loosen her embrace on Han's body, and looked at the man with a sad look.

“your life must suffer greatly, Han stop loving me, you deserve to be happy with the person you will love, I am just your past Han, love we can not be eternal with”

“how can I be happy if your shadow is still around me, how can I love the Kaira people?”

“Han! You can go through all this, you just need to learn to forget about me and let me go, Han heard me-” Keira said, she held Han's cheek with both hands.

"if you're like this constantly-How can I remember-how happy there Han, if you keep holding me back with all the regret you've felt for three years”

“if you can't then do it for me, you want me to be happy, right? Then forget me Han .... Relieve myself go”

Kaira stepped back, accompanied by the return of the white mist that instantly closed Han's path to chase after Keira who had disappeared.

“Kaira!!!!”

“Han!”

“Han! Wakeup!”

“Han, be aware that Keira is no” said Doctor Park who is now staring sadly at Han who is still confused.

“Sorry Mr. Park” replied Han who was downcast sadly, Han continued to lament his miserable fate.

“want till when will you escape from all this reality Han? Don't you like that patient named Lisa?”

“ak-I-I-Didn't like”

“I'm sure you like it but you're hesitant to admit it Han, you deny all your feelings towards it, as if you thought it was only the limit of a doctor and a patient, and that is, try to be open to her and understand about your own feelings .... ”

“Han, remember one thing if you love chasing but if you don't love her never try to give her false hope, the day I allow to sleep in my room, I go first" doctor Park said, today he decided to go home early.

And Han who was in his room only fell silent, Doctor Park's words were like a sharp knife ready to hurt him.

'Lisa must have been so hurt with all my words, towards all the things Han had done, did that make Lisa wish for me? Or maybe I'm not sure of my feelings?'

The question kept spinning around in Han's head, making him even more confused by all this, why is love so complicated? Don't even know if she loves Lisa or just thinks of Lisa as Kaira?

Unwilling to get dissolved in his complicated thoughts, Han chose to seek fresh air to clear his mind and his messy mood, han's favorite place in this hospital is the park behind this hospital.

But Han's steps came to a halt, when he accidentally collided with someone.

“Sorry---Sean?”

“kakak? How can brother be here? Waitaminute! Brother is already a doctor?”

Sangking happy Sean immediately hugged the brother, he looked very happy to meet with the brother, it means his mission is to bring the brother back home.

“what if we talk at the park”

******

Han and Sean, now both are sitting in the back of the hospital, but it is already night and the wind there is quite strong, too, the air there is also quite cold considering that this has entered winter or winter.

“why can you be in japan? How about your college?” ask Han who started the conversation first.

“I'm here because my friend is sick sister, for college I took a leave of absence for 3 weeks, my friend will have surgery, my, he needs the spirit of the people around him but his family is very difficult to divide the time for my friend, that is the reason I am here” said Sean, he gave a warm coffee to his brother who had bought before going to the park.

“a girl? If true, maybe the reason will be different, do you like it?” han asked while drinking the warm coffe.

“I don't know like it or not, but that's not the important thing big brother”

“then what's important that makes you get to Japan? You even took a leave of absence when your graduation was in sight?”

“Sister Han, the important thing is you brother, I'm here to take you home, brother knows father's condition is very bad lately, he even keeps asking yourself to me brother”

“what sister has found sister's lover?”

“I lost him Sean, he's gone”

“go with another man?”

“stupid! He's dead”

Sean : “........”.

“the reason I left home is not chasing my girlfriend, because there are things that make me unfit to stay with you”

“what because of dad?”

“no, not Sean's father or mother's fault, but because I'm not his biological son”

“it ... Brother must be lying! Impossible!”

 “the reason I left because dad wanted to tell you to replace him but he was afraid to offend me”

“just right dad keeps forcing me to approach the daughter of a dad friend, I'm not ready to hold Dad's company, sister”

“Sean you are father's biological child, you have the right to it”

“but brother? Why do you keep asking me about brother?”

“i don't know either, as we should

back, night wind is not good for health”

“at least meet him once brother”

Sean's words were not ignored by the fellow Han at all, the man in white continued to step up, leaving Sean alone on the park bench.

'brother, you never change! It's always difficult to understand Sean said.

After Han had started to disappear from Sean's reach, he had just stepped off the park bench and returned to Lisa's room.

Inside Lisa's room, the girl was looking at the bracelet Han gave her during their visit to the doraemon museum, Lisa missed the man who gave her this bracelet, she said, it's been three days not seeing him make his life empty.

With great difficulty Lisa tries not to hope that the man will return, but her feelings are inversely proportional to her expectations, the heart always wishes that the man would quickly return and meet her.

“Lisa? You haven't slept?” asked Sean, who was now walking over to him while carrying warm milk.

“I'm just going to sleep, are you going to accompany me tonight?”

“this drink, like I can't Lisa, I have a very important affair tonight”

“what's major?” lisa asked while drinking the milk Sean gave her.

“I can't tell you, I'll leave after you fall asleep”

“you can go, I'm fine alone here, I'm used to”

“well, take care of yourself, I make sure before you open your eyes I'm already beside you” said Sean, before leaving he took the time to stroke Lisa's hair.

After Sean left, Lisa immediately pulled the blanket to sleep and turned off the lights that were beside her. Lisa slowly began to close her eyes, and began to fall asleep in her sleep.

Thirty minutes passed .....

Quietly Han comes to Lisa's room, the man steps carefully toward Lisa who is already asleep.

“you still look beautiful even though you are sleeping Lisa, sorry if I just showed myself again” said Han who is now standing next to Lisa who is sound asleep.

“Lisa, I can't promise you this, but I will try to believe my heart, will you wait for me?”

Han asked Lisa who couldn't possibly be answered, Lisa couldn't even hear what Han said now, Han slightly lowered his head, Han gently kissed Lisa's forehead.

“i miss your sweet smile Lisa”

After being satisfied in Lisa's room, Han immediately left the room, she did not want Lisa to see it now. Han still needed a few days to search for the answer to every question that was in his mind and heart, Han wanted to appear in front of Lisa very already convinced by all of this, sure if she loves Lisa or not.