THE WOMAN ON MY WEDDING DAY

PART 21 APOLOGIZES

"I just want to ask you, Laras.Why did you choose the Ivory mas and me as the one who has to bear all this? I'm sure you have a reason why you did it." Asha's eyes glared sharply at Laras who suddenly did not budge in place.

"I'm going to get out of this house, ma'am. I will remember every kindness Asha gave me. But I don't have to have a reason to do everything. I'm just evil and just think of Ivory sir and Mbak Asha as random victims of my actions that are in turmoil because the real men haunt me irresponsibly. That's why I don't have to make excuses." Laras lifted his face.

"If I were to report you to the police, would you say it?" Asha's eyes tapered.

"I won't say anything, even though Asha put me in jail." Sahut Short soluble.

"When you're in prison, have you ever thought about your son's fate?" Asha asked sharply.

"The fate of no one can predict it, not even my own. If Zyan has to experience it, then I can't change anything." Laras lowered his face, covering his teary eyes.

Asha let out her heavy breath.

"Well, if you remain adamant about hiding who Zyan's father really is, and the reason behind your coming into my household life. I will try to be fair, everyone has a second chance at life. And I give you that, when you get out of this house, I'll pretend to forget what happened between us. But..." Asha leaned her face.

"Never come again in my life or in the life of Ivory. Fix all your mistakes, no one's too late to be a good person." Asha spoke in a softened voice.

The barrel was riveted, his tears just popped out, dripping over the back of his hand, but he did not want to raise his face.

"Never repeat the same mistake. If someone else isn't me you made this way, maybe it's never the same thing. So, beistiqfarlah, hajjudlah...God always provides a way out even in a narrow passageway, when you feel there is no more exit. Make Zyan your encouragement to be good." Asha stood up from her seat, slowly walking towards where Laras was sitting while looking down, her hands trembling to fold the baby clothes on her lap to put in the suitcase.

"Wheel..." Asha leaned over and placed an envelope she had taken from her pocket onto Laras' lap.

"Use this, some of my savings I can give you to make. Hopefully it can help meet your and Zyan's needs while you get to work again. I believe you can take good care of and raise Zyan. The child is the care of Allah, take care of him, your fortune will never be lacking."

Baras raised his red and puffy face. Leaving to Asha who stood looking at him without the slightest hint of anger in her eyes.

"I don't want this...!" Laras said trying to sound loud but there was a sound like a heartbreaking choking sound.

"I don't want to be pitied! I don't want Asha to act like this to me! It is better that Asha hates me than that Asha be kind to me!! Don't do this to me..." The crying of Laras broke out, sounding so painful and heartbreaking.

"Laras.i don't love you.I'm not being nice to you. I am only a human being who cares for my neighbor, I only care about Zyan as a child who was born without sin but had to suffer from the first time he saw the world. I don't want Zyan to feel the same pain as me and you, who live in a foster home without parents. Don't ever judge my attitude because I'm good to you." Asha says, flat.

"Why? Why is Asha being so good to me? Why can't Asha be mean to me, at least I'm not burdened with this kind of guilt!" Baras bit his tear-soaked lips, the envelope crumpled with fingers that seemed to be stiff.

"Every crime should not be avenged by doing evil, because if I repay you, it makes us the same person. I'm giving you an apology as a punishment you should remember for the rest of your life." Asha turned around, without a word, a smile was seen on her lips, she had won the heartache that was trying to surface, a feeling that brought up her wrath. He did not become filled with anger that seemed to want to overflow, because Asha had convinced his heart to make peace with the reality in nature.

"Why? why are you punishing me this way, why are you making me not only hate your luck even now I hate myself because of you. Why do you make me become not only envious but become filled with malice. The more you do good to me, the more I hate you...! Wh why? Whyaaa?"

...***...

Laras puts Zyan on the bed, the baby looks exhausted after they both get off the taxi this morning and immediately find a place to stay for a while until Laras finds a new rented house.

Fortunately, his friend Voni, who worked previously at the bar, wanted to lend him his boarding room, because he was out of town.

Laras promises to move in one or two days until he finds a contract or an empty boarding house.

The money Asha gave him was enough to live a few months, 20 million, at least until he found a new job.

Just now he straightened his waist while marginalizing his suitcase and some of his bags, the boarding door was knocked on.

The barrel frowned, perhaps a friend of Voni or his neighbor who was looking for Voni for one interest.

Baras opened the door, he had not had time to lift his face, the door was pushed violently, making Laras lined up almost to fall.

"I never told you to get out of there!" Heavy sound that is very well known Laras.

Laras's eyes bought with fear, staring at the figure standing with an almost eerie cold look, dampening the slack hidden behind the sunglasses perched on top of his nose.

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