The Soulmate Must Meet

Episode 6 - The Way of Love

“Why are you wearing a hijab?”

Perhaps, the question was not just from Rifa, other people would ask in his mind, including mother.

I could never think of an answer to Rifa again. For in myself there are still many unanswered questions. In the past, my mother also asked me that question when I first wore a hijab.

“You want to be ustadzah?”

I just smiled—while trying to wear the hijab in front of the glass. Mother's eyes were red, she had just woken up after getting drunk last night. Eyes that still hold love for me, even though I know that love has been divided, or has died buried by wounds.

“This is where I help you wear!”

Mom stood behind me, then tidied up her hijab and put it on me. The touch of her hands is very smooth touching the skin of my face, and occasionally rubbing the hair so as not to mess when putting on the hijab. In just a few minutes, the veil was already attached to my head.

“It turns out, you're getting prettier if you wear a hijab.”

Mom's tears are dripping.

“Mother crying?” I turned my body. Then, mom sat on the edge of the bed.

“Not crying, only shed tears.”

“That's the sign of crying, Bu.”

“Different Anggun. Crying is just a charade, but shedding tears is an honesty of heart.”

“Mother is sad?”

Mom shook her head. There's a secret hidden by him, something I might not want to know, or vice versa? My mother had many secrets. At this late age of mine, I still can't guess the contents of my heart and the real life of my mother.

“Mother?”

He got up from his seat.

“What Mom will always keep to herself? I've grown up Mom...”.

Mom's eyes are getting puffy, then she sits back on the edge of the bed. The excitement peaked, as if his life had never had a light, only darkness always enveloped every step.

“Mother only remembers the past.”

“Last time? Mmm... Did you wear a hijab?”

He took a deep breath, then wiped his tears. There was an aura of freedom when he said the past, as if the secret door would open.

“Before Mom moves to Jakarta city, mom wears hijab. Mother came from a distant village, an island across the ocean.”

I was stunned—put both ears to listen to his story. However, she stopped her words, as if waiting for a question from me.

“Mother stuck in this city, Anggun.”

Mom was crying. Tears that had originally only dripped, now flowed profusely, like rainwater falling from the roof drains of a house. I couldn't say anything, because I didn't understand my mother's words either, which I understood that she used to wear a headscarf.

“Mother do not cry, there is Graceful here.”

We hugged, I felt that mom was very lonely. She needs someone to share her feelings, she needs me. In my heart I promise, I will make my mother happy, I will not leave her alone.

“Anggun, promise mom, that you will never take off your hijab, no matter what.”

I looked at mother, looking her eyes sharp, as if commanding me without any reason to refute.

“What's Why Mom?”

“For if you take off your hijab, then you will feel pain like Mom.”

I realize now, that mom was hurt. Deeply wounded, until his life was spent treating the wound in his own way, he did not want anyone else to treat, he felt that the wound medicine was in his grudge, he said, it was in her hatred that she chose the path that I had always considered wrong.

“But..”.

“Do not argue!”

I was silent for a moment our eyes clashed, the vibration of mother's love felt clear into the heart. I'm down.

“Good Ma'am..”

It's just that, inwardly saying that I also want mom to wear the hijab back so that mom can't feel the pain, so that mom can heal from the wound. I let go of my mother's embrace when I finished saying that in my heart.

“Mother, why not wear the hijab again?”

Mom tried to smile.

“This has become a life choice.”

“Life selection?”

“Iya, Mother chooses injured for forever.”

“Why is that so, Mom?”

“Entah, maybe the wound can also be as medicine.”

I can't take that answer yet, but I can't do anything about it. Mother has more right to determine the path, and I am also currently still led by her to the path I want.

Mother got up from her seat, then stepped out of the room. I stared at her back through the door, I was happy to have a mother like her. Perhaps, to others the mother was a drunk, who often went out at night, who often received male guests at home, without being clear who the male guests were.

But to me, mother is everything. He also became a father, an older brother, a friend and a teacher. He and I rarely talk at home.

“Mother!”

He stopped his steps. I chased after him, then hit his body, there was a very sinful feeling in my heart. It was as if I had made a new wound for mother, when I always thought that mother was a comforting woman. I'm so sinful, I'm sure, mom's not a whore.

This hijab I wear, when my heart is convinced that mother is not a prostitute, mother is a good person, she just wants to see me happy, she thinks about my future. This veil becomes a belief that God is never blind, God always knows every servant who believes. Mom rubbed my head.

“Hei, even dumbfounded!” rafa Tegur.

“Eh? What were you doing?” i'm appalled.

“Why are you wearing a hijab?” ask Rifa.

“Ooh... Mmm.. because I don't want to be hurt in the world and in the afterlife.”

“You mean?” Rifa scrunched her forehead.

Suddenly the bell rang, the break time was over. I got up from my seat, and stepped out of Rifa to enter the classroom.

“Anggun, wait! You haven't answered my question!”

I kept going, past the female and male students who were looking at me suspiciously, probably because I was different from them, because I was wearing a hijab. But I never distinguished them. I've always wanted to be friends with anyone, I wanted to hold the world by the rope of friendship.

“Injured why?” ask Rifa.

Apparently, he ran after.

“You want to wear a hijab?” askaku.

“Pengen anyway.. when you see it on TV, many artists wear hijab. I think it's good that way, it can look more beautiful.”

“Ya... Then, just use it!”

“But...my family is not veiled.”.

“Indeed it's a hereditary factor?”

Rifa laughed at the words that came out of my mouth. Meanwhile, I was also surprised why that word came out of this mouth.

“It usually is. Bu Haji's son, must be veiled.”

“Terus?”

“It's weird that I'm veiled, while my parents aren't veiled.”

“Mmm.. It's your life choice. I do not feel forced and certainly do not want to maxain you too, because everyone has the right to determine his own path.”

“Duh, your talk has been weird lately!”

I just smiled— and immediately entered the classroom, because the teachers had already left the office to enter the class that they would teach. This heart, finds a way of love that is getting brighter, in this life.