The Soulmate Must Meet

Episode 21 - Chained with Anger's Lust

“Maybe these lips could have been mute,

but sorry, my heart and mind are my freedom,

as an individual who has a life of his own.

Let this be the melody of my life,

don't you fuck around like you want,

really it won't be possible.”

I just want to shout those words to Fatimah. A woman who is a leader. It was as if he was ruling me. Although organizationally, I am a member, but that is not the attitude of a leader. A leader must be able to lead his members to the good and right path, instead of spreading anger, which results in hate and resentment.

Three meetings, I was just a messenger, clearing the place of the initial and final discussion, I was still patient. But today I really lost my temper, I don't want to have to take those piles of books to the library alone, many members are unemployed. Why should it always be me?

Looks like Fatimah did hold a grudge against me, but what? I don't know, I don't understand his way of thinking. If it wasn't for Masriyah's mother asking me to join here, I wouldn't have been willing.

“Loh why are you still quiet? Let's clean!” fatimah.

This is very contrary to her beautiful face, a beautiful person should have a good personality, as a Muslim, of course that is coveted by many people, but Fatimah is not like that. He had intelligence, but that intelligence was only empty if he saw it like that.

“Sorry... i..”.

“Do not argue! Remember, I am the chairman of this assembly!”

His voice was getting higher, this really made my hatred grow and grow, even bigger.

“Fatimah, I've been too cape!”

I finally let out a high voice, in order to preserve my honor as a mature woman. Maybe a child will do the same if treated like this continuously.

“How dare you call my name! Call me Brother!”

The natureak! He is increasingly haughty, it is not in this modern era of education about seniority and juniority, all the same. What distinguishes only vision and mission, and of course the charity of worship in the concept of Islam.

“But your preview of me does not reflect a leader.”

“Oh so, so what do you want to be treated for? Special? Remember, I wouldn't accept you here if it wasn't for Ms. Masriyah's request.”

“I also don't want to join here, if He doesn't ask me.”

“Well then, I will say that you are not worthy to be in this interpreter assembly, your abilities are zero, you can only seek attention, spread charm to all male students.”

Spread charm? Whatdoes thatmean? I never spread the charm in this assembly, I just can not argue when the discussion takes place, I was always set aside by Fatimah, when I have a lot of arguments, and it is worth it, I think, for I also refer to the exegetes of the books I read.

Our eyes looked at each other, full of hatred I caught the meaning of that view, Fatimah did not like me.

“You slandered me!”

I'm angry, I don't want to be accused like that, because in fact I've never done any of that, I even keep my distance from the male students, despite the fact that they would rather chat with me when the discussion was over.

“Not a slander, but a fact!”

“What proof?”

“Oh... So you want proof? Well, wait, surely you will be surprised, and will certainly be expelled from this boarding school!”

“Loh? What right have you got me expelled from this place, isn't this a public place, where everyone studies.”

“But not a place for the child of a prostitute!”

My heart is pounding, what an unfit greeting to a Muslimah, why is Fatimah like that? Wh why? I felt no tears dripping, my heartache with his words, I am also a person who has feelings. I hurt easily, I was really hit hard.

“Why storm?” suddenly a voice surprised us.

Subhan stood in the doorway, his eyes reflecting the question to us, Fatimah changed, his face reddish, as shy as possible, he just smiled towards Subhan, while I was erratic, he said, this feeling is already very uncertain.

“Nothing Kak, just being discussed, it turns out Anggun really smart, no wonder if Bu Masriyah recommends to this assembly.”

Whahuh? Why did Fatimah suddenly turn one hundred and eighty degrees? A violent face turned radiant, this must be nothing. Could this be all about Subhan? Did he harbor feelings for Subhan?

“Of course.. how his preaching got everyone amazed, I am sure he will win that race,” Subhan said.

Fatimah's face growled at that, but she held him back. It is certain that there is a liver disease stored in his chest, he must have hated me because Subhan had been paying attention to me all this time.

“Nothing great in hypocrisy,” I said.

Subhan surprised.

“Subhan's brother need what to come here?” ask Fatimah.

I'm sure he wants to switch the conversation, he doesn't want this commotion to be known by Subhan. But, I can't accept the treatment of this beautiful demon-behaving girl, she's like a thorn in the flesh, if not removed immediately, will continue to hurt.

“I just heard the noise from outside.” said Subhan.

“We are indeed in a fuss!” my answer.

Fatimah began to show an anxious reaction.

“Ribut? What are you guys fussing about?”

“No... no.. Isn't it common in discussions there is a commotion?” ask Fatimah.

“We're fussing about prostitutes!” my voice is no less loud.

“Pelacur?”

“Iya. There was a prostitute who saved a dog from death when she came home exhausted after serving three striped men, but she went to heaven. Can that be said prostitute?” my attack.

Subhan was silent for a moment, he looked towards me, and also looked at Fatimah. As if to convince whether this discussion is about prostitutes.

“For the business of entering heaven, man can never determine, it is all the secrets of God,” Subhan replied.

“That is what I mean, why man always makes a punishment against someone with his bad opinion, is not man can never have the power to declare bad and good, in the absence of proper science.” Ungkap.

Fatimah's face flushed red, she had completely lost. I had no power to hold back my anger, my whole body was boiling, as if to add Fatimah's red face with a very hard slap on her cheek.

“I agree with that.”

“And if I were the Dog that the prostitute helped, I would be very grateful, and would never say that she was a prostitute, to me she was a rescue angel. Perhaps, Fatimah had never used her knowledge in understanding things, she was filled with hatred!”

All was silent, Fatimah held back the anger. She kept her emotions in front of Subhan, it seemed like she did not want to look ugly in Subhan's eyes, she wanted to be known as a patient woman, really hypocritical.

“Actually, I have not understood the direction of this conversation,” Subhan said. Of course he didn't understand, because not from the beginning was he here, he was just a bully to Fatimah who would intentionally skin me.

“Better, you ask Fatimah, maybe she can give understanding. I still have business with friends, thank you very much for the time.”

I stepped out of the room, but before I got to the exit, I turned my back.

“Oh yes, Fatimah I asked for help to clear the books to the library. And... Now there will definitely be someone helping isn't it?” my eyes glanced at Subhan. Then I left them.

I'm sure they're watching me leave this place. But I don't care, I'm really angry about Fatimah's attitude, why a beautiful, intelligent Muslim woman would do that to me. Is not intelligence used for maturity, is not beauty used for humility, is not a Muslim should be able to appreciate each other, let alone he is a human being. Fatimah is a hypocritical woman, but a mask! Astarghfirullah…