The Soulmate Must Meet

Episode 25 - Munajat Cinta

“Lord, You have bestowed beauties upon me, as well as sorrows. And you sprinkle this life with the luster of Your majesty, while I still disbelieve Thee. I still commit sins, not grateful for every pleasure of beauty and test of sorrow.”

My eyes shed tears, this self felt filthy by the sins I might have committed, consciously or unconsciously. This self is small, very small in comparison to the power of God. I am a traveler in this strange city, a city far from where I came from.

I just want to study here, I don't think looking for a soul mate, for me the secret of a soul mate is the secret of God. No one ever knew whether or not a soul mate would come in the near future, with whom we were dating, no one ever knew. For me, science is more useful than finding a soul mate for now, so why are so many female students looking for a soul mate here?

Tonight, I was alone in the mosque. Nobody's here, two in the morning. I just want to get closer to God. There is hope if you are always near God. As if the most difficult problem had been solved. I am very grateful, the slander is not spread anywhere, only only known by Khodijah and Aisyah, although this heart is anxious, it will certainly expand soon.

If that happens, then I fight it alone. Not willing for my mom to be said to be a whore, she was everything to me. And I can only pray for him to always be saved, to be made easy in the afterlife, there is no obstacle to heaven.

I often seem like a weak person helpless to maintain self-esteem so that I am unable to resist every word and deed of someone. However, this heart screamed to rebel and fight with all its might, because I alone had to defend myself.

Lately I have been feeling a sense of inner satisfaction here, a sense of progress, a sense of my strength recovering, but that doesn't mean I have to fight the injustice that comes to me, I have to weigh in, will it have a bad impact on everything.

Tears are getting worse over the cheeks. My love will only be given to God, I want to be a devotee, my days are spent worshiping me, O Lord. I should worship you, You are a leader, but give you a sense of security, justice and peace. But Fatimah, your servant who has everything, cannot control himself. I can no longer afford to hold on.

Should I hit him, even fight to satisfy this pain. You created strength and weakness, O Lord. Is it to destroy the weak? I still do not understand about all the events that happened to me, which makes this heart must be willing to be sliced.

I honor You, Lord, asking for guidance for each of my steps, I still consider each of these pains to be an infinite gift from You. Lead me to Your light so that my heart may be ever warm, let me not be overcome by the lust of anger, the lust that can destroy everything.

“Don't grieve Anggun.We are there for you,” Khodijah's voice surprises me.

I turned around, Khodijah and Aisyah sat behind me. A sweet smile was etched from both of their lips.

“I'm sorry that I hurt you.” said Aisyah.

Is what they say true? Or they're just pretending, to trick me into telling me the real story of my life.

“We are sincere, we should not believe Fatimah's words,” Khodijah continued.

“That bill, even if your mother is a..” Khodijah stops his speech.

“We will continue to accept you as our best friend, and we will always take care of you in joy and sorrow,” continued Khodijah.

“Every human being has his own destiny. It is not proper for us to punish you with our own bad thoughts.”

They were still looking at me, while I was trying to translate all the words issued by them. I've been with them for months, and I've also felt that I have a new family with them. Nor should I hate them, nor should they even defend me when Fatimah says it all.

“Do not!” my spoken.

“But he deserves a lesson,” continued Khodijah.

“That's not the work of a Muslim. Do we not often hear ustadz and ustadzah saying that evil is never fought with evil, but with good. I have been sincere with what Fatimah said, although I have never heard it directly,” I said.

“Subhanallah.. very noble of your heart,” Aisyah hugged me.

Khodijah just smiled looking at the tears that were still melted on the cheeks, then he wiped them with fingers. I felt there was a return, an empty heart alone, now filled with two beautiful friends of mine. It turns out that God always answers what I pray, so very good God is, only humans are always disbelieving, always feeling weak.

“This evening is star-studded, you don't want to see it?” ask Khodijah.

Aisyah let go of her embrace.

“Iya... yuk, out!” pull Aisyah.

I held them for a while, then let go of the face. Then the three of us immediately stepped out of the mosque. The atmosphere was bright tonight, as if the lights were not working to shine in its darkness, because the stars were luminous above the sky, the number might be more than thousands.

The sky became bright, I saw it like thousands of fireflies playing in the sky. Indeed, God's creation is unmatched, nothing can match His power. Even if man has the greatest sophistication, my eyes do not blink at him.

“We'd better see in a higher place!” exclaim Aisyah girang.

I immediately pulled Aisyah. Khodijah also followed us, I entered the mosque tower arena, then climbed the stairs. We ran small, really very cheerful, we wanted to get there soon. The sound of our footsteps resounded within here, but there was no one for us to worry about, all had fallen asleep vanished in each other's rooms. A few minutes later we were already on top of the tower, at the edge of the tower looking at the very luminous sky. Our eyes were amazed to see it all, it was amazing.

“Let's pray!” bring Khodijah.

“Apply to the stars? That's a shirk,” prevent Aisyah.

“Not to the stars but to God, we are allowed to pray on events that we think are impressive,” replied Khodijah.

“Let's pray in our hearts!” myrag.

Everyone closed their eyes.

“Yes Allah..in the course of this life there are many temptations and obstacles, I just want to be awake from the torment of hellfire, and gathered with those who firmly believe in You. All temptations and obstacles are Your tests as a science for me to mature more in stepping in this mortal world.”.