Still waiting for you

the bitter past scene

I blinked, circulating my gaze, feeling alienated by the space I was in right now. Then where is this?, what am I doing today until I end up lying limp in this room.

"Ah, "I massaged my twitching forehead as I switched positions to sit.

"Darling, are you awake?" I saw Nature walking in with a tray of warm ginger and a medicine box.

"Yeah, I just remembered where this is. Have you gone home yet?" I asked slowly as she helped me arrange the pillow on my back so that my sitting position was more comfortable.

"I went right back to the news you fainted earlier." He looked at me worriedly.

"I'm sorry, baby" she said softly with a guilty look.

"People's mas." I was weak and helpless as emotions began to approach.

"I'm just saying you Am, I don't want you to be late in knowing this reality."

"Do you have to do this, how?"

My tears shot, I can no longer contain, this situation is very confusing. I wanted to deny it, but the fragments of memory ten years ago seemed to race to come to the surface to strengthen reality.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know that you'd be this shocked "Nature's down on regretting what it did.

My tears broke, I bent my knees and folded my hands and drowned my face there. This cry I could not control, my tears kept falling, my memory returned to the bitter scene five years ago.

At that time, with his spirit I met the Amar bang who came from far away to meet me. I picked a cafe near the store where I worked for our brief meeting. I put in a messy hair tidying before I met Bang Amar. I saw him sitting on a cell phone on the sofa in the corner of the cafe. I quickened my steps towards him, positioning myself in front of him with a radiant face.

"Bang Amar has it been a long time ?" I asked still in cheerful mode, how not?, Four years we did not meet. My shady fluttered wings ready to embrace him. I chattered ria told me a lot of things I went through without her. I who only have novy as my only friend after he left have an abundant stock of stories to share.He just kept looking at me, so happy I could not read his reverberation at that time. I thought, he was silent because he enjoyed the series of stories I shared. But my joy was faded by the arrival of the fashionable dressed woman who arrived and was greeted warmly pleh bang Amar, briefly shaking hands and hugging in front of me.

I was dumbfoundedly responding to the hand of the woman outstretched before me.

My view doesn't shift from the Amar bang for a second. The woman understood his position and chose to sit next to the Amar bang. What the hell is this?, I am aware of High School close to the Amar bang never once involved in a skinship even though it is just a shaman. And this woman?, have I misinterpreted my closeness to her all this time?. Then, the message to keep waiting when he said that time how?.

I still did not take my eyes off her, she silently stared expressionlessly, and the woman beside her several times fixed her position sitting, visibly riled up by the silence created between us. In silence I tried to build strength, preparing the worst thing that would be said by a faithful man silent in his silence.

"Hmmm so gini, I'm this..."

"Sorry meena, I'm sorry" she lowered her head, squeezing her hands firmly on the table. Very good, he finally made a sound after his woman tried to explain this awkward situation. As much as he protects, no matter me who is troubled to build a pillar in the heart so as not to collapse after being hurt.

I inhaled a deep breath and exhaled it slowly, smiling. Looking at them in turn, I won't let them know my heart is breaking. Their happiness has no right to tear apart my sanity.

"Good bang, I'm so happy."

I stood up, greeted the woman and moved closer to embrace her. Don't forget to say congratulations on their relationship.

I stepped away leaving two lovebirds who might be relieved of their relationship who no longer had a rock.

🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁

This bitter memory seemed to be pulled from its hiding place. I tried hard to throw him out so as not to come back in the dream. Nature forced him back. No, Nature just wants me to finish everything. The one I let hang didn't find the end. Wasn't that time I couldn't hear his explanation. This time I have to make peace with him, because bang Amar I will often meet later, he is the brother of Nature, that means he is my brother-in-law, he said, my business with him in the past I must take care of it completely so as not to block my future trip with Nature.

"Honey, don't cry dong. I don't know what to do if you cry gini,"

Nature persuaded me several times. And I still faithfully hugged my knees to dampen the sound of crying and turbulent emotions in my heart.

"Mother, Halalin, now yes, so I can hug Ami if it's crying gini."

Nature peered spoiled at mother when I heard some steps of people entering the room I occupied.

"There are still mothers who can remember Ami yes lam, do not be so smart that you."

Father chimed in the spoiled attitude of Nature.

"Can't be well, mom won't be able to. Ami would want it in the embrace of Nature, not mother, the smell is different."

I couldn't bear to peek at Nature's ever-changing expression as a chameleon. He could have acted spoiled and rancid at about the same time.

"Musakut you stink, huh,?" Mother asked cynically to Nature.

"No bund, we have a distinctive aroma. If the aroma I bring makes it comfortable fit hug, but if the aroma of mother tuh bring it makes the laper just fit hug" Nature ended her observation session with a whimper.

" This is a child..... " Mother did not continue her scolding because she heard my laughter explode. I shook my head and tried to stop the laughter when I saw Nature showing a stale expression.

"Why?, my crying has subsided. How exactly that."

"Today I'm just laughing at you Am."

"Loh, why?"

"If only you could stand the laughter for two more hours. This afternoon must have been clean for us."

"Mas Alam for what you can think of this random thing?"

My laughter broke with the laughter of mother and father. So did Nature, she joined in echoing laughter in the room that had originally only befriended my sobs.

Until the appearance of someone on the doorstep obliterated my laughter, the atmosphere returned to silence, the mother's father and Nature exchanged views.

"I want to talk to Amar together can Mas?."