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All Answers Belva

"I'll answer all your questions. Did I just love you? Not Sara. Without realizing it, I'm actually starting to fall in love with you. I used to just say that I care about you. Don't you know that caring is a form of loving? When exactly do I love you? I don't know either. God can make people fall in love so quickly. The saying goes that it only takes 90 seconds for a human to fall in love. I fell in love with you, in a time and time that I don't really know."

Belva began to answer Sara's questions. The man opened one door at a time in his heart and tried to share it with Sara.

"Why didn't I say it long ago? I'm the stupid Sara. However, know in this world there are some people who can not say the feelings of love. I realized my mistake. Maybe for you, I'm the bad guy and the jerk who touched you and rubbed you heartlessly. However, do you know when you touch you when you sow my seed in your field, my chest is tight and bounces at the same time. Forgive my mistake, Sara." Belva spoke again and apologized to Sara.

Slowly, Sara's eyes glazed over. That was how she felt that Belva touched her without feeling. It also makes Sara sad every time after giving rights to Belva as her husband. She felt like a worthless woman.

"Don't cry Sara .. I'm really sorry" Belva said as she looked at a clear circle that had almost fallen and dripped from the corner of Sara's eye.

"That's how I feel, sir .. I feel like it's just a field for you. It is like a piece of land that is silent and receives without resistance as the farmer cultivates his field, plows it, sows the seeds in it, sows it. A land that could not rebel and defend itself" Sara replied sobbing.

Ah, hearing Sara's words now Belva's chest feels tight. The man immediately wiped away the tear on Sara's face. Hearing how Sara felt first, making Belva also regretted and cursed herself.

If only he had the courage to express his love for Sara. Sara would not be in such pain. Anyway, Belva remembers that Sara is still a girl. Yes, Belva still remembers that the first time he rubbed Sara made the girl faint from shock must have been due to the burden of thoughts and trauma in the past. It feels like Belva went back four years and fixed everything together with Sara.

“I'm sorry, Sara ... no matter how much I apologize, it seems that it can't heal the pain in your heart for what I did four years ago well?” ask Belva with a witty look.

Sara then wiped her tears, slightly turned towards Belva, “Does Pak Belva want me to accompany Mr Belva because Anin's sister is gone?” ask Sara now.

This time, he asked me that. Is it true that all Belva's feelings and requests arise because everything has changed? Is it true that Belva asked him to come with her because Anin is gone? If so, could Sara just be a shadow to Anin who is gone.

Quickly Belva shook her head, “Of course not Sara. Not because Anin is gone. Even when he was around, I was in a time where I admitted that I love you,”, Belva replied.

***

Nearly two years ago …

Belva does not think that Anin apparently in silence knows that she almost comes out of her room every night and chooses to sleep in Sara's room. Belva thought, Anin has really fallen asleep. Turns out wrong, Anin actually caught Belva several times and went out and entered the room. Switching bed at dawn. Belva cheated on him in front of his wife, but he just moved to bed.

As if to get an answer to Belva's attitude, finally one night Anin ventured to ask Belva.

“Is every night actually just me sleeping here alone?” ask the woman to Belva at that time.

“You mean?” ask Belva briefly.

“Honest me .. I won't be angry. Is it true that every night, you come out of this room and choose to sleep in Sara's room?” ask Anin calmly. Even though his heart was raging, but Anin chose to calm down and wanted to get an explanation from Belva.

Belva who was originally silent finally spoke, “Iya .. I slept there every night. I'm sorry, Anin .. but, I can't. I tried to lie here in this room, but in fact I kept remembering Sara. Excuse me. If in the past, you said not to involve feelings in this relationship, now there is precisely me who involves my feelings,” Belva story honestly to Anin at that time.

“Didn't I say .. I received Sara. I don't care if you remarry, but that woman must be Sara. Why should Sara? She is not only a good woman, but she also tries not to take what is not her right. I'm willing to share it with him. Besides, Sara appreciates me and doesn't look down on me.” Anin replied calmly. This is the second time he has spoken to Belva that he would be pitted against her if she were Sara.

“I've been looking for him everywhere, but I can't find him. I'm sorry, I actually love him. He came into my life with his own charm. Makes me keep thinking about it, but I actually made a mistake with him,” I'm Belva honestly.

“Pursue Sara .. pursue love. Remember, I don't mind at all,” replied Anin and at the same time he gave an affirmation that he did not mind.

***

Now …

Belva finally told Sara the story two years ago. Not because Anin is gone, but her feelings have been there for a long time. Belva simply did not have the courage to reveal it.

“For four years it's not like I didn't look for you, Sara. However, after Anin's departure, I also had to put Evan first. He was a kid at the time. I don't want him to get lost in grief. I'm trying to be a Papa and Mama for Evan,” explained Belva.

Yeah, after Anin died. Belva has to really focus on Evan. Not wanting to make his son lose and dissolve in grief. Even though Belva himself lost, but he himself tried to rise. He had to handle Evan, giving his son full affection. In the last two years, Belva lived only for her son Evan.

Ah, the more Sara sobs. All the stories told by Belva actually make his heart feel more tight and pain. Sara did not think that the great man before her had experienced such a hard time alone with Evan. I don't think that in the last two years, the fate line seems to be flipping Belva's life so tragically.

Belva sighed with all her chest now, her thumb moving back and wiping away the tears on Sara's face.

“Don't cry Sara .. everything has become the past,” says Belva.

“Sorry,” says Sara with her quivering lips. There were no words he could say other than apologies right now.

Belva smiled, “No need to apologize .. Everything has happened. So, will you accompany me once more?” asked Belva who seemed to need an answer from Sara.

“Give me time to think,” pinta Sara in the end.

Belva then nodded her head, “Alright .. only please don't accept me just because Evan. I don't want you to accept me just out of pity for Evan. Don't be Evan as a consideration for you, it's just that I want you to make a decision based on your heart,” Belva said.

“Good Sir,” Reply Sara.

Belva then circulated her gaze in Sara's room, “As for you know, this room has officially become mine, Sara .. after you leave, I occupy this place. But now, because the owner has come .. sleep here. I'll sleep somewhere else. Rest is already night, do not forget to lock your door,” message Belva this time.

Hearing the message from Belva, Sara also broke up. Didn't think that the man could have told her that. Presumably Sara had to completely lock the door if she did not want to be visited by the middle of the night by the man who had just opened all the answers for her this time.