MY LECTURER DUREN (COLD WIDOWER )

Chapter 8's

🍀POV 3 NATHAN🍀

Two days later the dream came again. The nightmares of betrayal and tragedy made my life dark.

The pain came back I felt.

Why didn't God take my life at that time?

I was angry, feeling very sick.

I vented it by throwing all my stuff.

When I woke up, I faintly saw Faizal.

My best friend and psychiatrist who I nicknamed knows that.

There, too, was Anindira talking to Faizal.

Anindira realized that when I woke up, our eyes met. I immediately threw away my face, not wanting to linger - long looking into his eyes.

He must have known everything from Faizal.

Faizal.

"It's medicine. I told you to come. Your therapy schedule tomorrow. You should come. For Arsy."

I didn't answer. But Faizal must know I'm coming because he already mentioned Arsy's name.

Faizal finally left me and Anindira.

The girl inched closer to me, looking at me with an expression I could not understand.

Wh why?

Look.I'm not that perfect to fight for.

He will stop, he is young, his future is long.

Why is he still hanging on with a sick man like me, who is 8 years old with him?

The girl sat beside me. Forcing me to look at him.

Unexpectedly, she was crying.

Anindira crying. The jolly silly girl who had always behaved as she wished was now crying as she pleased.

"It must hurt sir. must be very painful because the father has been holding it alone."

His words in between - between his tears.

I can't believe this.

My chest is back.

And the tears that I had been holding, finally burst, along with her embrace.

****************************************

🍀POV ANINDIRA🍀

~ Only with simple things can you make me smile. Is love really that simple?

__NATHAN_

***

His name is Faizal, he introduced himself as soon as he finished checking the situation of Mr. Nathan, as a friend of Mr. Nathan as well as his personal psychiatrist. And it turned out that Mr. Nathan had fainted instead of falling asleep, it seems true said Arsy I was stupid, distinguishing sleep and fainting alone I could not, fortunately Faizal quickly came at that time.

"So.. What's Mr Nathan sick, brother?"

I call him Faiz's brother. Because he said he was single. And don't want to be called father.

Brother Faiz sighed before answering my question.

"PTSD. You know that?"

I can see hearing it. A foreign term I just heard. All I know is PSTD (pengak silat basic energy ). It is clearly far different...

Faiz smiled, seemingly aware that I did not know what PTSD was.

"Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or post-traumatic stress disorder. Psychiatric disorders triggered by tragic events that have been experienced or witnessed. In Nathan's case, the symptoms are severe. He should be on SSRI therapy and medication.

I was speechless listening to Faiz's explanation. Didn't expect Mr. Nathan to have the disease. Is that why Mr. Nathan shut himself down.

"Anindira, Nathan told me a few times about you in therapy. He starts to open his heart to you. I'll tell you everything Nathan's been through. Because I don't want Nathan to experience the same thing a second time. So after this the choice is in your hands."

I looked at Brother Faiz. Squeezing both my hands. "Alright brother. I'm ready." Say steady. This is what I'm waiting for. I want to know all about Mr. Nathan.

Brother Faiz finally told me everything from the beginning.

"Nathan was quiet for a long time, but not as bad as he is now. He is smart and has been an assistant professor. Jihan's boyfriend 1 college with her. Not long after they were married. Because of their young age, fights often occur. Especially Jihan the slightly naughty woman. Nathan used to come to my house for advice on his family matters.

But their relationship eventually improved a little after Arsy's birth."

Brother Faiz then took a breath, it seemed heavy to continue the story.

"Are you sure you want to hear this?" Faiz asked again.

I nodded my head again.

Brother Faiz looked at me for a long time, then went back to talking.

"The peak 5 years ago. When Arsy was 1 year old, Nathan suffered a tragic accident.

Both of his parents were in an accident and were taken to hospital. Plus Jihan his wife, turned out to have been having an affair, even bringing her affair to their home, when Nathan was busy taking care of his parents.

That day I received a call from Nathan, he said to come to his house immediately.

I came and all I saw was Nathan staring blankly at Jihan's blood-stained body."

I was shocked to hear it. "So.. Mr. Nathan the......"

It's impossible for Mr. Nathan to cause Jihan like that.

"No, it's not like you think, Nin. Nathan didn't cause it..." Brother Faiz hung up the words - he said.

"But Jihan killed herself. In addition to cheating on Jihan also turned out to be a drug addict. Nathan's angry. Then he divorced Jihan right then and there, and wanted to report it so that she could be rehabbed, but Jihan instead chose to end her own life slicing her hands with glass. And not long after that Nathan also got word from the hospital that his parents died." Slowly follow.

My body immediately sat down to hear it. How could it be so stragic. In 1 time Mr. Nathan lost everything. Only Arsy is left. He loved Arsy very much.

"That's why Nathan shut himself down now. He doesn't trust anyone. And he couldn't sleep without drugs all this time. Because always in the ghost of a nightmare. But lately his condition has improved. Someone has to support it. Anindira. If you are not serious, it is better to stop now. That's my message."

I didn't answer. I don't know why my heart hurts to hear it. I looked back at Mr. Nathan. He woke up and was looking at me. Our views met earlier.

Not long did Brother Faiz say goodbye, after talking briefly with Mr. Nathan.

We both stayed in the room. And I decided to approach Mr. Nathan.

Although I still doubt, fear Mr. Nathan is angry or raging again.

I just wanted to hug her this time. Want Mr. Nathan to share, want to reduce the burden he felt so far.

************

Tomorrow at the college

I told Sarah everything. At least I need some advice from my best friend.

Sarah looked at me in amazement after hearing me tell her a story.

"Crazy, Nin. You've been kayaking in soap operas. But I also don't understand. I know pain tuh colds, coughs, jovial, do not know pain - severe pain like ptsd it. Hiii don't take it.." Sarah shuddered in horror.

"So gymnast dong, Sar.." I'm really confused right now.

"That's mah gimna lo aja. You're not the same as Mr. Nathan. If you are serious you have to support him, support him. You have to read a lot about the disease. Let's not be stupid - stupid very."

I shake his head in anxiety. How could he say I was stupid. Even though his level of intelligence is also equivalent to mine. 11 12....

"Nyesel I told you the same story." Sewot.

Sarah just laughed.

"Yes the decision is in your own hands, Sar. You will walk. I can only help with prayer..."

I'm back to thinking. Everyone says the decision is in my hands. I was confused and confused myself. Hearing the story of Brother Faiz, I also felt pain and did not have the heart with Mr. Nathan.

So how am I supposed to?

Do I have to go ahead or stop now?

****