Lutfi Gilang's

6. Heart Dilemma

i

I just finished finishing the food served by the Great old man. Actually, I had to. Forced because it has been hastily served, forced because they forced me to eat it, forced to come to Agung's house, and forced to help him on the side of the road because his motorbike broke down.

But it was this compulsion, however, that made me get my energy-energy replacement intake that had been drained out after a day of circling Purwokerto in search of news about Lutfi, which in fact had no fruit.

"What happened to the police station? Abis arrested? Now what criminal are you?"

"That's what is nudu?"

"Ha ha ha...." Great laugh. "Well, what's the matter?"

"So I watched TV,"

"Well, kere very, watching TV at the police station all. In my house, it's big." he said while pointing to the 21-inch TV.

I chuckle. "Not watching obscure events" I said at last. "Watch the CCTV."

"CCTV mosque?" He's nanya. "Why? Any more burps?"

I'm shaking. "Ga tau,"

"Well, how, anyway? The real!"

I exhale. "So, this morning, there's a girl who nyamperin I—"

Agung pretended to cough cut my sentence. "About Lutfi again say, now so deket-deket girls?" ledek.

"Ga, be faithful to me!" shanka.

"Yes, believe it." she said. "Why do girls? Ask for your hp number, huh? Uh pretty, huh? Ha ha ha...."

"Just one, I'm confused as to which one to answer."

Great still laughing. "What did he ask?"

"Signs to the terminal." I answered.

"Surely you ask someone else?" the Great guess.

I'm nodding. "I told him to take him to the driver."

"Ha ha ha, gokil! Why aren't you getting delivered?" Agung asked, but to me he was just repeating the ledge.

I grunt.

"Ha ha ha. believe me, tuh, Gilang the anti-girl."

"That's Lutfi!" my Sautku quickly made Agung back to widen his lips.

"Ha ha ha, what does the girl have to do with the CCTV mosque?" Grand asked back on the previous topic.

"He told me, he said his wallet was stolen—"

"With the hooded thief?" saut Agung cut my sentence.

I'm nagging. "I reported to the police, kept being told to look at the CCTV of the mosque."

"Oooh.... Keep meeting?"

I'm shaking. "The girl who came before him was just a normal college kid. Again in a hurry, late at most."

"Or kepengin berak. Ha ha ha...."

I laughed a little at hearing it.

"Keep, go on, what kind of girl's purse?"

I raised my shoulders. "Lost in the house what are the sprains in the bag."

"It could be," he said agreeing to my guess. "girls are a lot, but the bags are small."

I gulped down my glass ignoring the words of Agung. "I think I want to go on."

"Near Lutfi?"

I'm nagging.

"Mending, now you rest first" he said throwing attention. "Tomorrow to go again."

"Ga can," I replied.

"Don't be forced, it's night."

"I know. But tomorrow I can't go around here anymore."

"Oooh.... Why?" tanyakanya.

I exhale. "Tomorrow at night there will be a meeting in Jakarta" I replied.

"Nova novel?" Grand guess.

I'm nagging.

"Again the importance of gini keep working?" He's nanya, his tone is slightly insinuating.

"It has to be professional, right?" I said try to stay strong. "After all, if I mess up my job, I have to compensate."

His face was surprised. "Residence? How many?"

"Fifty million,"

"Did?!" Agung exclaimed, forcing his family to gather while throwing the question: "Why Gung?"

But he answered: "That's all, just a shock." Great back facing me after the conditions back conducive. "Areally that many?"

I'm nagging.

"Why was it taken?"

"You know, right, there used to be Lutfi. We used to make books once a month."

"But, the fine is mostly that." the weight is fast.

I agreed with the signal.

"What if it's clear to you?"

Great Eyes widened, his face changed to resemble a puffer fish. Resisting surprise. Then gulp. "I can't believe it's a writer's salary that much."

"If you take a rough contract," I replied.

"Rude contract?" He's nanya.

"Yes, you have to make a book according to the company's wishes within the specified period" I explained.

"Ooh. That's a big pay, huh?" he seemed interested in my work. "But, come to think of it, it's a hassle. Having to make a book that suits the company's wishes not to mention there is a time limit, it must be very difficult, right?"

"The name is also a rough contract,"

Great breathing heavy. "That the book is ready?"

I'm shaking.

He showed a worried face. "Not done with the point? It hasn't been made at all."

I'm nagging.

"Ah, don't joke, dong!" her door.

"I still can't get out" I said

"Well, how are you?" He was on a high note. His face turned worried. "That's tomorrow, you know!"

I chuckled while shaking my head.

"Did you go home first? Who knows if there will be material for nulis."

I'm nagging.

"On Lutfi, don't think too much, I will also help you to meet" he said trying to calm me down.

"Thank you Gung" I said.

"Together" he answered.

Great led me to the front door, and waited for me to leave in my vehicle.

I drove the motor home with all the flavors mixed in. About Lutfi and about work. Both should take precedence. I can't put one of the two first.

Ah, my heart and brain, both are completely messed up.

"Lutfi, I really need your help. Please, come back."

🌹🌹🌹

ii

When I got home, I found my father in the living room, who was busy reading the newspaper.

I regretted. "Honest holiday?" ask me, then sit in front of him.

"Collapse" he answered.

"Why?"

He folded the newspaper in front of his face. "Tomorrow to go on the train, I've bought tickets for you" he said, handing over a piece of paper.

I'm appalled. "Good story, what?"

Father shakes. "That father, always know your activities. Usually, I ask your Mom to give you what you need, but Mom is lazy to meet you, he said."

"Huh? Why?"

"You think to yourself" he rose to the kitchen.

"But, Sir...."

"Udah, rest there. Tomorrow must leave at six o'clock from Purwokerto Station" he said without looking at me.

I approached. He was busy making coffee. "Why did Mamah males meet me?" I repeat the previous question.

I mean, I've had enough trouble with the disappearance of Lutfi, I don't want my family to disappear later on without a trace.

Dad patted my head. "Later you will know the answer yourself, if you have found Lutfi." Then back to the action. "Mandi, keep changing clothes there. You smell like a goat."

I nodded according to his orders with my brain constantly thinking about the reason why Mamah was lazy to meet me. What was the disappearance of Lutfi? What because I haven't found Lutfi yet? Or because of something else? But, what?

🌹🌹🌹

iii

I was lying in bed after I finished cleaning myself. Despite having a shower and shampooing, I still did not feel refreshed. Even a fan that rotates at high speed does not help at all.

Obviously, my brain is too busy working on weighing where Lutfi is, what I should be telling you at tomorrow's meeting, and why Mamah is lazy to see me.

If only the brain was like a man-made machine, you would definitely see the smoke puff due to overuse in work.

I closed my mouth, trying to rest myself even though the brain was still flying thinking about things. Five minutes, ten minutes, half an hour, up to an hour. I still didn't get the peace to reach dreamland.

I exhaled, feeling that everything would be more chaotic than now.

Lutfi, where are you? Where the hell did you go? Why did you leave me alone? What wrong? What did I do to make you leave? Whahuh? Whahuh? What's?! Please tell me. Please explain it to me. Please don't torture me more than this. Justjust please. Justjust please. Help u! I'm begging....

I groaned with tears that slowly flashed across my cheeks. I got up, and grabbed the smart phone on the desk. Pressing the button until it forms a series of numbers commonly used by Lutfi, then contacting him.

Soon I heard a woman's voice. "The number you are going to cannot be reached, try a few more moments...."

I repeated the call. Once, twice, three times, twenty-four times. Thought it would change if it fit his date of birth. But, it makes no difference.

"What's one more moment?! You can't be contacted!" I grumbled. Put my smart phone down to make a noise.

He bowed his head, squeezing it with both hands.

Why like this? Why is it like this? What the hell is going on? What wrong?

I was pensively with tears that I could not stop. Feeling that I was a useless man by making my lover disappear without a trace, the man who sucked in still did not discover the whereabouts of my lover who disappeared without a trace, she said, a loser by making my beautiful life instantly become gloomy and chaotic.

How's now? What am I supposed to do? Should I give up on looking for him? Should I give up and look for a replacement? Should I give up on him in my job? Should I give up on him in my life? Should I give up on my life? Should....

Please, please. help me Lutfi. I beg. Help me .. please, come back.