Lutfi Gilang's

Part Two

My apartment, Turkey, 2019.

This afternoon, I was packing to get ready to move to another place, again. After getting the latest news that Lutfi was flying to Japan, I immediately took care of the resignation letter from the company.

There's not much I brought. Just a few change of clothes, and my books first. One of them is the Lutfi diary, of which one-third of you have finished reading the first book, Novel Gilangku.

I, thank all of you who have read it and have been in such a hurry to help me find the whereabouts of my beloved heart. Although indeed, you did not help me in finding information about him. But, still, it motivated me to get back together with the woman I love, Lutfi Nurtika.

Being with him, holding his hands, talking to him, joking with him, eating with him, exploring the earth with him, and loving each other as always, having a family together.

Yes, that's my hope, too great hope indeed when viewed in terms of Lutfi just keep going away from me for no definite reason. However, I'm sure, there's still love in his heart. Because in my heart, there is still love for her.

I just finished putting my clothes in my suitcase, suddenly there was a greeting and the sound of the door being knocked. "The door is unlocked" I said, letting the man in and back to my activities. I did so because I understood the owner of the voice.

"You sure you want to go?" ask the middle-aged man in Turkish after the door opens. He's Kahraman, an old man who became my neighbor in this apartment. Five years ago, his wife went to the place where God was after an accident, while his grandchildren went out of nowhere. But by chance I found his youngest daughter who turned out to be the owner of the restaurant where Lutfi worked. Sometimes the world is not as big as it should be.

For five years living alone Grandpa Kahraman only rely on his retirement rations, and indeed at the age of almost 70 years he is not as productive as men in their 30s. You can certainly imagine, how difficult it is to live by relying only on pensioners, not only— sometimes the money is difficult to liquid, but also the amount is not how much. Fortunately, Grandpa Kahraman does not have a mortgage mortgage and or other goods installments. So, all he needed other than his family was to eat.

Therefore, the first time I got information about Grandpa Kahraman's life from the owner of this apartment, I often leave a banana fruit in the morning, I often leave a mornings, and in the evening before night I left sarma—food made from seasoned rice covered in young grape leaves or certain other leaves, cooked by steaming or boiling with a little water; or ekmek—roti.

And after a week of doing the routine, Grandpa Kahraman left a letter under the door of my room to take me to dinner, which eventually made me so often stop by his place just to eat or chat. So, there's no harm if I consider him like a brother to myself, like my own grandfather.

I got up and stared at Grandpa Kahraman. "That's how,"

"Huh... This building will be boring, and you will make an old man like me lonely, again." he said in a disappointed tone.

I threw a smile, approached her, and invited her to sit down. "Where's your son?"

"I told him to go home" replied Grandpa Kahraman.

"So, you still can't accept him?" my many.

"It's hard to accept those who've left me alone for five years. It was not a short time! ... Anyway.." she said eventually. "I don't want to trouble them."

I grinned at his confession, amazed that he had no grudge against his children who disappeared for five years, allowing himself to live alone after the death of his wife. Maybe that's how parents should be. No matter what the child's fault, parents still have to act wisely and there is a great desire not to trouble their children.

I'm getting impatient to feel how to be a parent. I wish I was better than Grandpa Kahraman or any other parent in general. But before that, I must find Lutfi as soon as possible, before my hair turns gray, or I will have no offspring.

"So, you don't want to leave this apartment?" my many.

He's nodding. "In addition to the wedding ring, it was the only thing my late wife wanted. Too many memories, too heavy for me to take them off. I really love him."

"Me too," I said to her surprise. "it's hard to let go of Lutfi. I'm so in love with him."

Grandpa Kahraman caught his breath. "How long has your fiancee been gone?"

"Four months, more than three days." I answered.

"You still want to look for him?" He's nanya.

I'm nodding.

"Are you sure of your decision?"

I answered with a head movement like before.

"Hmmm.." murmured Grandpa Kahraman. "it's possible that your fiance has decided to part with you."

I throw a smile. To me, I have heard that phrase so often. "When your wife left and didn't come back until now, was it a breakup with her?"

His face turned surprised.

"You know, for me, there's no separation before he asks me to separate directly."

Grandpa Kahraman breathed. "You are indeed very similar to me when young .. very stubborn."

"Is that a compliment?" I got up to the kitchen. Make drinking.

"Of course, in a positive context. In addition to being kind to others, you also really love your lover. Very stubborn! Until it makes your partner difficult. It's possible that your fiancee is like Rahsheda my wife." Grandpa Kahraman explained.

"He ever left, too?" I asked as I poured the tea into the cup.

Grandpa Kahraman nodded. "It's a lot like what you're going through."

I came back and served him. "Please,"

"Wah. You do understand an old man like me." he said, then sipped the cup.

He chuckles. "Looking at you, it's really like seeing my reflection when I was young." He muttered and continued his sentence. "Like your Lutf, back then, forty-five years ago, my wife Rahsheda also disappeared after I proposed to her,"

I was shocked to hear Grandpa Kahraman's confession. "I just heard the news,"

He smiled and said back. "I even need to visit four countries to be able to find it."

I bowed, hoping and praying that I would not be that long in finding Lutfi.

"So, you know, one year for each country...."

"Ah," Consider me. "it's an uphill battle. So, why do you want to do it?"

"Like you," he said and returned to tea. "for me there was no farewell before he asked me to separate directly. And.. even if he had asked for a separation directly, I still would not consider parting before he married someone else. More than that, even if she's married, I'll either wait for her to divorce her husband, or wait for her husband to die."

"He," I chuckled in salute. The fight is incredible. I respect her even more, "you're so stubborn."

"That's love. Not only blind but really make people lose all their senses." responded Kakeh Kahraman.

I nodded in agreement. "So...what did he say when you found him?"

"Do you mean to ask me to spread what you have to get first?" He asked back.

I flinched, then breathed out softly. "yes too. I have to hear it myself."

"Listen, despite my looks like this, I have worked as a lecturer for twenty-five years, and have already run into the problems that are afflicting you right now ... so I hope you remember my advice on this one" he said in a serious tone.

I answered him with a nod.

"'Trust with love Lutfimu.' ....It's a simple thing, but when you doubt your love you'll get worse and get off the right track, where you'll find it." Grandpa Kahraman explained.

I'm silent. Still trying to work out an explanation from him.

Suddenly he laughed, making me surprised and looking back at him. "It turns out I was wrong, ..you don't look at all like me,"

"What do you mean?" my many.

"You have sharp eyes. I'm sure your desire to meet the woman you love is beyond my feelings" Grandpa Kahraman said, touching my heart, giving me goosebumps.

"May your feelings be right,"

"You're gonna prove it, aren't you?" his asking seemed to give me a burden if I should be able to find Lutfi faster than him. At least, half of the time Grandpa Kahraman found his wife, Granny Rahsheda.

I'm snapped. "So, why are you here?" tanyaku later.

"Aah!" He exclaimed as if he had just remembered his main purpose. "I came because of a message. I have to give you this" he said, putting an envelope on the table. "Read after you find your Lutf."

"Ah... Hopefully this message does not need to wait too long" I said.

"Do your best" said Grandpa Kahraman.

I nodded, grabbed it, then kept the letter on my suitcase, and again sat in front of Grandpa Kahraman. But suddenly he got up. "I'm going to go now" he said.

"Why?" my many.

"You need to clean up your luggage, don't you?" Grandpa Kahraman asked back.

I agree with the signal.

"Then, see you. Take the time to visit this dying old man, and make sure you'll come with Lutfi, Gilang. Bana sono ver!" her door.

"Some veriyorum!" my response.

I closed the door and resumed my activities. Actually there are still a lot of irregularities in my mind to fly to Japan, I mean, I don't know yet whether Lutfi is really there or not, and also I am quite worried about the condition of Grandpa Kahraman who began to get many diseases because of his age is no longer young. But I'm not his family, I don't have to take responsibility for his life. More than that, he had met all of his grandchildren, although at the first meeting he yelled at them to get home quickly. But I'm sure, it's only a matter of time before he can get together again with his family.

And, that's what I have to do now, even though my hopes of meeting Lutfi in Japan are less than ten percent, I will still travel there. Because that's the only lead I have.

As I was picking out the book I was going to bring, and the one I was going to send home in Banyumas, Indonesia, my eyes fell upon an old brown book with a marker that read "The Missing Lovers".

It was my old book, the journey before I could arrive in Turkey. And maybe, if I read it, I would remember such an incredible effort that it required me not to give up until I could find Lutfi, and hear the reason for it just keep going away from me.

Perhaps, too, I can send my past story to the publisher before I fly to Japan for another week. And maybe, by reading it I will know everything I've forgotten all along.

I got up and sat down at my desk. I opened the old chocolate-covered book with a passionate feeling, about the ultimate longing.

I started reading.