I REPLY TO MY HUSBAND'S AFFAIR

THE WORLD IS NOT OVER

The morning was quite busy, I desperately prepared everything for the presentation at Mas Bayu company later in the afternoon. All the possibilities that can be asked to drop my proposal in the presentation later I have thought carefully. I'm determined to pass the tender, must!.

Sarah just came after being called by Mr. Kevin, in a hurry to get into our workspace and sat down while looking at me and the teammates he saw were very serious about discussing. Like he brought important news after meeting with our leader earlier.

"Rest first, Ma'am. Later even fatigue can fall when approaching that important day.There is the latest news, the time of presentation in the retreat is three days away. Take a rest, take it easy." Luluk reminded me that there was no stopping to reply to the contents of my proposal with the team.

"Can't I can't calm down until all the details are ready for debate. A little more hopefully, why in time?" answer me stubbornly.

"The directors have a sudden business today. Here, move sit near me here. ALL team can rest first. Want to snack, coffee, what ngeteh free, refresh our mind and energy first, yes." Luluk smilingly looked at my teammates one by one, asking to leave our room for a break.

I obeyed Luluk's request, turned off the laptop and switched to sitting in front of his desk.

"I think you are depressed, I see there is a big fear in you if you fail to win the tender later, so you burden yourself with such a desperate presentation. You didn't forget to pay attention to your son, did you?" luluk said at length.

"Look me depressed. This is the only opportunity for me to be admired by my husband again and show my toughness as a seductive woman husband of that person" I replied while looking away.

"Yes, I get it. But you also have to prepare the side of the heart to be disappointed if the kit fails the tender later, yes. There are many roads to Rome, okay?

"Okay, that's why I'm struggling so I can't be disappointed" I replied stubbornly.

Instead of nodding in agreement, Luluk looked at me with a look of pity.

"Yes, but I see you've been overboard until you forget to rest, it's not good like that. Eeemm, how about we go see a marriage counselor"

"Lulok? I can still deal with my husband's problems myself, I don't need any counseling yet." I replied stubbornly.

Luluk looked at me again, still with a look of pity.

"uh right? You're so easily offended, huh? I mean, look at me! Make my mistake as a bad example" Luluk held both of my shoulders, implied a sense of care in the look on his face..

"So how should I? Stay at home in the corner of the kitchen lamenting the husband who was embat pelakor? Don't be busy proving yourself, do you?" I said grin.

"That's not what I mean, Hani"

"So, how else?"

"Emm, I mean if you meet a marriage counseling expert, at least you are more focused on taking steps and decisions. Don't like me, I used to rush to feel my choice to keep a career was the most correct, I finally lost my husband" Luluk lowered his tone, rubbing my shoulders slowly.

I can't answer just by sticking my fingers together with my restless heart, changing my sitting position, then sipping a glass of drink that Luluk took from my desk.

"How long do you think I can try to hold on?" Finally I shared my unrest with Luluk, asking for his opinion to take a stand.

"Don't ask me, my head is really happy, I'll give you the wrong advice." Luluk replied while grinning indistinctly.

I who was filled with anxiety, finally laughed at the ridiculous answer my sabahat.

"Yes really, really, too. But once it's okay I follow ngak actually like you let me take a decision maybe?" I said no less silly with Luluk.

Luluk was open to my answer, but soon he returned to a serious look.

"What plan? I mean when trying to survive first on the side of Bayu want how? ask Luluk.

Luluk grabbed my shoulder, then comforted me with many words to make me not carried away with heartache. He didn't want me to be fragile because he felt like I was going to be thrown from the throne of my husband's heart.

According to Luluk, it makes no sense Bayu is willing to let go of me who has given him a baby that is very in unfortunately. Suppose I wanted to stay divorced, Luluk was sure Bayu would be ready to seize custody with me.

True, divorce is permissible but also the most hated thing by God because after divorce there will be children who can no longer be whole to get the love of both parents.

"I used to get divorced because I thought I could make a beautiful divorce"

"Where is that, a beautiful divorce?" I smile and feel funny.

"Yes. A divorce I can at least remember beautifully, I mean without leaving any regrets. But.ah already. Regret is meaningless, after all my ex-husband is happy with his new wife, so why do I keep the pain that makes me lose myself, right?"

I nodded with a serious face. Luluk's complaints did not stop making my nyaliku to rush apart so slightly shriveled. I went back to thinking, what would it be like if my son took care of himself later. Also, how long can I rise from the wounds of the divorce, because being a widow is usually looked at one eye by the wider community, can I?

"Diem's cigarette? Are you hesitant to separate from Bayu? Yes already, you can try to survive first, pamper your husband more. Bikin Bayu always want to be close to you so as not to mempan digaet Early"

"Well, that's what I can't be sure about"

"You mean, you don't feel worth competing with Early? yaelah.you're still beautiful, Hani! Bayu was once again kasmaran met his past love. But I'm sure, he'll regret it later if it's really early marriage, just can remember all your kindness when he was his wife."

"You just want to make my heart happy, don't you? Later if you have seen the beauty Dini, then you understand. The woman is beautiful, beautiful, clean skin glowing, smart and also good career.then I mah what oruh?"

"You? You are the mother of his son Bayu, a submissive daughter-in-law, a wife who willingly so Upik ash at home without much demand. I can't wait to ngomelin Bayu, he don't think what later Dini can be a wife as good as you?"

Honestly, Luluk's praise does not necessarily make me feel like a great woman, instead I feel more and more lacking, not being able to make my husband loyal only to me. I think my choice to try to leave the house is right, I want Mas Bayu to realize the meaning of my presence on his side.

"I've been intent on separating in fact, already carrying a suitcase in the trunk. Later in the afternoon the plan will immediately move to the contract to pick up Fahmi, and I did not pay attention first. You think it's wrong?"

"Wrongly so. But for your husband's lesson it's okay too. But where do you want to contract? And how do you love children's understanding?" Luluk looked at me worried.

"I've been looking for a contract, later if you pass the tender you can probably buy a simple house. Now you must understand why I desperately want our project goals. My problem now is just giving Fahmi a reason to stay away from her father."

Luluk heard me, scrunched his forehead as if he was thinking to feel my difficulties.

"We as women must be given the same sensitivity of God, to feel that our husband can sincerely not accept ourselves as we are. The marriage will want to be equally happy.life must go on. would choose to survive, alone or with others if God gives a soul mate again. The world is not over.. Is that it?" Sarah said, pretty smart this time.

"But the weight of the choice, Luluk!"

"Take your time. You can leave the house, you have time to consider divorce or survive. Okay?"

I was just about to answer Luluk's words when suddenly our manager came in and called us to his room. Mr. Kevin looks impatient to talk about something important.

"Bu Hani, with a heavy heart, I'd like to reconsider including mom in the presentation later." Mr. Kevin looked at me with a very serious look.

Surprisingly, the presentation that I had imagined would be a foothold to start my career and win the tender suddenly had to drift out of my reach.

"what's wrong, huh, sir? Please guide him if there is a shortage." I quickly chimed in Luluk's words, trying to figure out Mr. Kevin's reason.

Mr. Kevin's room is comfortable and cool, feels so gripping for me at this time. Will my path to be able to separate from Mas Bayu be hampered because my career will be stopped at the beginning of this step?