I REPLY TO MY HUSBAND'S AFFAIR

WON'T HOPE ANYMORE

After drinking a few sips from a bottle of mineral water that was helped by her son, mother looked at me meaningfully again as if to make sure I was not angry with him earlier. I tried to review the smile even though my heart was sore, did not have the heart to be unkind to the middle-aged woman. Not long after, the nurse called the mother's name to see the doctor.

I refused to go inside, so they knew I was starting to show a self-limiting attitude and was no longer the closest person to them.

"Mommy's tally to the car first, I want to redeem the medicine to the pharmacy," pinta Mas Bayu was a little annoyed to see me just sitting waiting until he finished seeing the doctor.

I just nodded in agreement, like the person who helped me seikhlasnya. Let me not be able to be a good hearted person for now. Was wrong! They hadn't thought about my kindness all along. I'm not counting the good deeds, am I! But I also need to strengthen myself at this time when there is no more leaning.

"What did the doctor say, Mom?" when my mother was sitting in the car.

"Eeem, the mother's tension is high, the stomach acid also rises." he replied lethargic.

"Hopefully get better soon, yes, ma'am," I hope sincerely as I sit next to my mother.

"What do you mean? You don't want to take care of me for long when I'm sick?" mumbling mother fiercely, then turned her face to the side.

"Loh, that's not it, ma'am. Hani prays mom gets well soon. Don't you want to be healthy again?" my answer went awry, not expecting my attention to offend my mother-in-law.

Mom just kept quiet, made me feel bad. Wait a minute, did mom behave so just as a tactic so that I feel guilty and not so go from home carrying her favorite granddaughter.I began to face prejudice again about this mother-in-law of mine.

****

I don't have a place to live that I can go to. My parents' inheritance house, now occupied by my brother who has married, could not feel if I had to trouble it by taking shelter there.

Although I was confused, it did not hinder my determination to keep away from the house carrying Fahmi. I am sure and surrender to God, there will be a way for me who has been in the husband's dzolimi.

Fog still covers the earth in the early hours, I accidentally wake up early, I was immediately busy packing some Fahmi clothes and put them in the car while everyone was still asleep. Later I will surf in an online market place to find a contract for me and Fahmi stay. Gradually I will prepare for my departure from this house, after picking up Fahmi after school.

Madam Min who has started busy struggling in the kitchen, saw me back and forth moving the suitcase into the garage with a look of wonder. I knew he wanted to ask tai did not dare. I approached him after finishing the prayer and woke Fahmi.

"Mbak Min, I'll leave mom, take care and take good care. Fahmi and I will be gone for a long time, this is for Ma'am Min's family shopping. For this month's salary, the father will pay at the end of the month. If there's anything on my phone, yes." I said at length without giving Ms. Min a chance to interrupt me.

In a hurry I left Mbak Min who seemed to want to ask, I had to quickly prepare for the office and make sure to prepare for my presentation. Not long after, Mas Bayu woke up when I just finished changing clothes.

"You want to go to work? I'm sick again!" ask Mas Bayu.

"I have an important presentation. If Maas wants, can mint Dini who does not need to work, ask to take care of the mother. I'm in time, this is going to have breakfast with Fahmi. Mother was still sleeping" I replied without looking at Mas Bayu, then hurried to leave the room.

"Hey, I'm not finished talking!" hardik Mas Bayu's.

I don't mind the man who only thinks about his own desires. I walked into Fahmi's room. Savings while I was working was still safe to survive to meet my needs and Fahmi. There is also a store of ornamentation, staying to work hard may Allah enable me to separate from Mas Bayu as soon as possible.

"Dani! Hani!'s!' calling him repeatedly, Mas Bayu followed my steps.

"Here and I have an important meeting, there will be a tender auction for advertising partners later" Only you can help me look after my mother."

"I'm sorry, but I have an important presentation. Just like you guys. Just find a wife who wants to be at home and not very smart who can take care of mother. I'm not the old Hani anymore, who you said you didn't connect with when you talked'" I said stupefiedly and annoyed.

"You want to prove that you're smart? It's free, don't dream in broad daylight." his taunts insulted me.

"Just lower me, Mom! In fact, you can't let go of me." I said grimly, leaving the man speechless without denying my words.

I kept walking to Fahmi's room, not wanting to get tired of arguing for too long which made me say no good later.

"It's good not a week of work you've felt great.just go if it wants you, but don't take Fahmi!" Mas Bayu blocked my move by forcibly pulling my hand to stop.

I'm shaking. "You won't be able to take care of Fahmi. In fact, Dini was worth more to you than Fahmi."

I shook Mas Bayu's hand. "Stop this fight, Fahmi will hear us cursing each other." I warned him.

"You are, you can look for your own money. Where do you work? It's impossible to work in the company that used to be, right? It's all impossible, you don't know the current advertising development." cried Mas Bayu no matter what I say.

I smiled at Mas Bayu's anger. Maybe in his mind only women as active as Early can keep up with the development of technology. Women who dwell in the kitchen of a dozen years like me is impossible to pursue the modernization of the times. He forgot, God gave me a brilliant brain that lives in the grind if there is a desire to be able to.

Actually, out there may be more wives whose sacrifices at home are not appreciated by her husband and choose to endure with a mountain of patience. However, at this time I have not been able to choose the same attitude.not because I lack patience but the presence of other women that I can no longer accept with a free heart.

When Fahmi finished breakfast, I hurriedly took him to the car, I asked him to say goodbye first with his father who just followed breakfast. Do not let the suitcases in the trunk of the car that I have compiled will be seen from the view of Mas Bayu, can fail my plan to leave the house today as well.

I drive the car immediately, my heart is a little calm now, dusk will be my first step to start proving myself if I have self-worth even though my body is not as beautiful as it used to be in my husband's eyes.

"Mother, what time did you get home last night from the clinic? I overslept when my mother came from the clinic." Fahmi's question blew my wishful thinking that they were making steps when they started leaving the house.

"It was late at night to go home. Don't worry, grandma just needs to rest." I said, understand that Fahmi must be worried about his grandmother's condition.

"Tadi Fahmi wanted to meet grandma for salim, but so lazy because there is a father in the grandmother's room. I'm still lazy near dad" my son said uninspiredly.

I slowed down the speed of the car, looking at Fahmi who was beside me, as much as possible holding back the grief that was shrouding myself.

"There's a time when Nenti mom will explain why you've been busy lately. You must still love me" slowly I gave the best answer I could.

I feel I have no hope anymore to continue my marriage relationship with Mas Bayu. The father of my son preferred Dini because I was not as beautiful and as smart as her, After that he made my figure out of his heart without recalling when he used to be persistent in begging to convince me to marry him.

Now inevitably, even though I am no longer young, I have to pursue a career again for the sake of my future and my son if I finally can no longer survive with my husband.