I'm Santri?

Seek.

Before all my desires were in my head. Stacking, lined, and crammed filled the subconscious. Instantly it was instantly silent as I stood on this plain. Where did that goal go?

I started looking for her between their veils. I see, there's nothing I got.

"Aleya we'll come here first. We have to meet Kiyai before Aleya becomes a santri." Saut Mother's.

I'm still silent for a moment. I'm still looking at them.

In front of the class, the children laughed with books bearing Arabic script and said "Assalamu'alaikum Ustad!." This heart began to palpate, looking again where was my purpose? Is he here?

"Aleya hunt! It's starting the afternoon!"

I turned to look at Mother who had dropped all my things.

"Yes, Mom."

I walked towards Mom. Who was ready to meet Kiyai.

"The stuff was taken by Mom?"

"Later, if we've been accepted by Kiyai."

"Does there have to be a criterion?"

"Yes, Kiyai does not want to accept students who have no intention to study and have a bad record. Kiyai also does not want to accept santri who has a weak body condition, high emotional soul, greedy eating, likes to sleep, does not want to read books, and does not want to do good. It is feared that such santri will actually cause adverse effects for other santri."

"What about Aleya Bu? Aleya was once dirty, even Aleya had been to a nightclub and Aleya's association was almost the same as today's youth association."

"We just try it first, hopefully Kiyainya will accept."

Smooth scream. But the words that are so heartbreaking and back make me look for where I am going? Especially in this sentence "I can't do anything." I feel the responsibility on my feet is inevitable.

If only by running and staying away I could be calmer. Honey, that is not the solution. Just wasting time.

In other conditions and situations like this, still no one gave me a way. When I started to get dizzy with the circumstances, when I started floating, when I started to cut off the thread, with the news that Mom said. Even God does not understand. Or maybe I am too arrogant with Him. All I want is to know more about Him.

If this hard condition becomes santri. Everything Mom said was almost there for me. I'll make sure I live on this land, I won't look for any purpose. I let him disappear. No matter where he goes, I won't go after him. And when I got nothing. Maybe one, I can make my mom relieved and smile. I think that's enough. Even more than enough.

"Yep, bismillah, may you be accepted, son."

"But Aleya is still not PD Ma'am!"

"Udah, Aleya will know what I mean."

I finally followed Mom. I walked behind Mom to Kiyai's house. On the way I saw many santri who were smiling happily. There is no pale face. As I expected, they were not alone and deserted. I think I'll be happy here.

Not long after, we arrived in front of Kiyai's house. I pulled Mom's shirt and whispered something.

"Mother, this is Kiyai's real home."

Mother bowed her head, pointing her ears at my lips. After hearing my words, Mother stroked her chest.

"Son, after you've been quiet here. You'll understand."

This beautiful house is surrounded by magnificent buildings around it like a five-star hotel-style building. Is this really the home of the Kiyai? The walls of the house still look dull bricks, the pedestal is not floor, only the base of the ground that has looked smooth, the glass window is only covered with used banners, and the roof of the house is neat but not yet covered by the sky. Can't we build a beautiful house? Though the cottage building for its cuisine is so magnificent and luxurious. I'm getting curious to see that figure soon. And I was also curious as to whether I would be accepted into this magnificent boarding school.