Heart Diary

13

Gratitude is immediately extended to the Divine. I can walk now!

For the first time in my life, I saw the Rose cry. The feeling of being moved by him may not be contained anymore.

Slowly I continued my steps. I am still careful in every step. Sometimes I fall too, but I get back up. Sometimes I cling to objects close to me.

After a long walk, I stopped.

"Dik Roses, Brother Zura can walk now," I said with great joy.

"Thank God, Brother Zura. Didn't I say that Kak Zura was diligent in training.It is impossible that Kak Zura's leg can be healed," replied Dik Roses while she wiped her tears.

Cower me for a moment.

"Byeah, Brother Zura. Whatever we do now, everything is predestined by God. Allah is not cruel, Brother Zura," said Dik Roses again.

I'm still down. There are no words for me to describe my gratitude to God. Only these tears fall from the eyelids.

"Bah long ago Brother Zura did not stand, Dik Roses. Take a walk with your own feet." My luck can't control feelings of sadness and sadness.

"Let's go all in, Brother Zura. But remember always, Brother Zura's legs are still weak." Advice on Roses.

I nodded in understanding.

"Oh yes, Brother Zura, do you remember the promise? Every promise is obligatory to keep." Dik Roses still collect my promise first.

"I mean the Rose... Dik Roses to take Kak Zura to the house of Dik Roses?" I try to admire.

"Remember, too" replied the Rose.

I was silent for a moment. Thinking about what I should say. Guilt started coming to my mind. Am I not shy of this person. Rarely visit people's homes except the rental house Dik Roses.

"All right, Rose. But not today ye," I said later.

"Thank you, Brother Zura. Take it, I arrange the meeting later" replied Dik Roses.

*

*

*

Last night Rose shed tears watching me walk without using a wheelchair and a cane anymore.

Today Dila anyway.

"Abang is really happy, Zura. But..." Abang Syah was also moved to see the development of my legs.

"But what, bang?" I want Abang Syah to reconnect his words.

"Abang Syah is afraid that you will no longer be willing to overlap the train to go to work." Sampuk Dila connected the words of Abang Syah who was cut off earlier.

"Openyabtaklah, Dila but I think it has been a lot of trouble Abang Syah. Morning again Abang Syah..."

"That's all the reason Zura aje. The reason for Zura trying to escape from brother isn't it?" Sampuk Abang Syah before I could finish my words.

"No, bang, no!" resolute reply.

"If not, why would Zura deliberately create an illogical excuse? Isn't our workplace heading in the same direction? Is it wrong to be filial with a fellow human being?" reply Abang Syah.

I was almost at a loss for words. How can Abang Syah stutter all this? What more reason do I have to create? Brother, actually I don't want to disturb your relationship with my best friend. I actually have been able to accept the fact that you were created for Dila and Dila was created for you. I do not want your relationship to be tarred because of my presence again. Enough of what has happened so far.

"Zura, allow brother to pick up the fan send Zura home as usual." Rayu Abang Syah's.

I'm getting more and more guilty. Between agreeing and affirming the stand. Uh! It's hard to make a decision.

"Zura, agree. After all Abang Syah is not someone else. My brother also ." Persuad Dila.

Glad you said, Dila. Entahkan sincerely enthuse no!

"Replace Zura think, bang." That's all I can say.

Abang Syah was silent.

Think about what else, Zura. Just agree. It's not good for a brother like that." Push Dila again.

It is not good to make others empty but me.. how? Since recognizing Abang Syah how many times I have drained the void. Talking is easy, Dila. You seem to be more deeply in the heart and feelings of Abang Syah than deep in the heart and feelings of your own friend.

"I'm sorry, Dila. I can't make a decision right now," I said still insisted.

"But.." Really rightly try to influence me.

"Not flanked, Dila. It's not for us to urge people. People don't want to be with us. We're gonna do what else." Rajuk Abang Syah

Indeed I know Abang Syah sulked. Today you have just sulked Abang Syah but my heart is out. It's just not showing. Now feel what I've been feeling all along. Not that I was holding a grudge, but circumstances forced me to act in such a manner.

I let Brother Shah and Dila pass without a word. By Allah! I do not intend to break my legs that can step now but deliberately I want to test.