For the Love of

15

Weeks passed, my life was still going on, though much had changed.

Now, I live here, in my hometown, Garut. Back to the parents' lap.

Here, I opened a small catering business to meet our needs.

The day that we-I and Mas Aji were declared divorced, I went straight home. With Mas Aji who is also coming. Meet Mom and Dad to talk.

Mas Aji apologized to them especially for feeling that he had failed to keep his trust.

"Sir Aji, if one day this father's son disappoints you, you don't love him anymore, please take him to the front of the Father well, huh?" So said Father 9 years ago.

Mas Aji proved his point. He came in front of my Mom and Dad and then spoke well. Tell them why I came back here.

"I'm sorry, sir, ma'am, I have failed to be a husband to your son. I failed to be the father of your grandchildren. I gave them hurt and disappointed. Sorry."

The man who heard it, was not angry. He calmly even approached towards Mas Aji, then firmly patted him on the shoulder.

"Thank you for returning our son well. Sorry also if all this time, the attitude of Father and Mother as your in-laws is less pleasing. So far, you've been a good son-in-law, son."

Mas Aji sobbed to hear a quiet speech from the Father. Father's temperament from the past is so, does not prioritize emotions in every action and horn.

"I'm ashamed, sir, Ma'am .. I'm ashamed."

"That's it, Son Aji. It's all been happening. Just make this a lesson. If in the future you will be married again, do not repeat the same mistake. Enough Salwa you betrayed."

The words of the Father at that time, made my mind drift far away.

Mas Aji will definitely return home. With another woman. Who could be younger than me.

No, I'm not jealous. All I thought about was the kids. What will be the fate of the children? Because after Mas Aji remarries, he will definitely have another child. That's what I'm worried about.

Is his affection still the same for our children? Or will it just focus on his new son and wife later?

Ah ... I think too negatively about that. Pray, hopefully good luck will always be with us.

***

Zayn and Aksa had not stopped babbling. It's night time but my two boys haven't been sleeping.

Last afternoon, they were invited by his grandfather to go to the rice field. They are excited not to play, because during their stay in the city, where ever they visit and play in the rice fields, not even see.

"So Brother fell, Bun. The body gets dirty" Aksa said with a laugh.

I chuckle at hearing it. It's true, back and forth, Zayn's shirt looks dirty.

"That's because you pushed, brother." The brother looked upset.

Aksa was giggling.

"Please help brother, right?" ask me to Aksa.

Aksa nodded. "Ditolongin, really. But his brother laughed first."

Aksa is getting stifled. Makes me want to not laugh either.

"Udah ah, bobo, yuk now. It's night."

"Dad not here, Bun?" Aksa asked.

"You used to go home a lot, now what?"

Before replying, Zayn interrupted first. "Later here, too, Sa. Udah yes, kasian Mommy must be tired, mendingan we sleep."

Zayn is already more understanding about the situation of his parents who are not like before.

"Grub your teeth first, just slept, huh?"

Zayn and Aksa nodded. We both walked to the room occupied by little Natasha. It just so happened that he fell asleep first.

10 Minutes later, they both fell asleep. Fortunately they were not fussy with the absence of his father.

I let out a breath. When they look at them they always feel guilty. They must be willing to be separated from their father because of my decision.

I rubbed his hair one by one. Then I gave him a kiss on his forehead. Not to forget, I always say sorry to them many times.

The sound of the phone ringing, diverting my attention. I saw Mas Aji's name on the screen.

Mas Aji still calls a lot, although sometimes I ignore.

"Hello?" my broom.

"Hello, Assalamu'alaikum."

"Wa'alaikumsalam's chat. What's up?"

Silence moment. "The kids are already in bed, huh?"

"Yes." Yeah."

"They're not fussy?"

"No, thank God."

"Thank God."

We fell silent again. Silent.

"How are you, Wa?"

"Good."

I heard, there, Mas Aji sighed. "Aren't you going to Jakarta?" tanyanya random's.

"Little."

I intentionally replied to her briefly.

"I'm sorry, Mas, Wa. Sorry if ..."

"That's it, Mommy" I said cutting off his words. "That's what let it be. Don't reveal it anymore."

Mas Aji sighed again. "Don't you give me, Mom, a second chance? It's like, I'm tormented to have to live far away from you, Wa." He's whimpering.

I let out a rough breath. Nosebleeds. Always like this.

"Mas, listen. You can still continue living. Don't be fixated on me. Find another woman who can take care of you. Don't be as if you're the one who's hurt," I said, "yes, Mom. Assalamulaic."