Flavour Bias

Feeding the Bear

Towards bedtime at nine after I gave the medicine to Sister Iyash. I got a call from Aunt Miranti. He said that Edgar called and told him he would be home tomorrow morning.

“Still, Cha. Thanks to you Edgar wants to talk to Mother again and she wants to go home.”

Lips riveted. “He came home because of his wish, Bund.”

“Ngak. It's thanks to you, Cha.”

“Pending a bonus transfer for you.”

“Bund, no need,” reject me fast. “Icha did nothing, Brother Edgar came home on his own free will.”

“But, thanks to you too, Cha.”

I took a breath back. “Ya thanks.” It is not good to refuse the windfall, even though I feel insulted, because I really only cost with the amount of money that Aunt Miranti gave. Maybe it's true Mama said, if they just want to use me. Or this is just my prejudice because I feel insecure.

“Mother, actually shy of giving you a little money, but–”

“It's enough, Bund. Not being loved is actually okay. Icha just wanted to help.”

“Iya, Mommy knows.”

“Bund, already yes, no phone in,” lied to me.

“Eh yes, tomorrow you go home with Edgar, ‘kan?”

“Not yet, Bund.”

I quickly closed the call. Before Mother Miranti again asked about my return tomorrow. I can't tell you what I'm feeling right now. Everything is like a mess and confusing. I don't like my life journey right now. Before Brother Iyash and Brother Edgar were present, my life was fine.

At first it was intent on lying, but it turned out that my phone was shaking again and an incoming call from Mama. Mama had called and asked the condition of Kak Iyash, maybe now she will ask the same thing. I was lazy to discuss the man, so I decided not to answer Mama's call. Until finally, my mom sent a message.

[Tante Ira and Om Hasa are there tomorrow.]

“Thank God, I can go home,” I thought before replying to the message.

[Cha, what is it, Mama's feeling is not good, because they invite Mama there.]

[Ma, he said, Papa used to come here, maybe Grandpa and Grandma wanted to meet Mama, because since Icha here they always talk about Papa and they also ask about Mama's news.] Calm down.

[Oh so.] Reply Mama briefly.

I sent an emoticon a smile. I hope you don't worry about anything about tomorrow. I understand that Mama is afraid of heights, hopefully tomorrow Om Hasa and Aunt Ira will not take Mama on a plane. However, even if that happens, I'm sure Mama will be fine. Already several times Mama went up to the second floor of our house, I think maybe Mama has recovered from her hobby, although it can not be equated with boarding a plane, I think, but for me it's an improvement because since a few years ago, when I wanted a two-story house, only a few times Mama went upstairs. His knees were trembling every time he climbed the stairs.

[Cha, yesterday Om Rudi came here.]

[Continues?]

[He proposed to Mama.]

[Well, doesn't he have a wife?] manywould be surprised.

[Have divorced. Do you think Mama accepted him?]

I sent a laughing emoticon with watery eyes.

[Why laugh? It's not funny, Cha.]

[Ma, is Mama tired of living without Papa?] tanyaku seriously.

[Mama is just thinking ahead. You will be married and brought with you your husband, keep Mama living alone.]

[Ma, she said if a woman remarried, later in heaven she will not meet and gather with her husband who died first.]

[Mama, did you dare to choose between Papa or Om Rudi?]

This time it was Mama who sent the emoticons laughing. Our lives seem like a joke. Mama and I used to laugh at anything that made our lives complicated. However, now that I feel my life is heavy, my feelings for Brother Edgar may be hanging and Grandma Alma's sentence still ringing.

***

It's my first day in the mountains and I feel the cool air here. There's no roar of vehicle engines and exhaust fumes here. There are also only a few motorcycles that happen to pass, but not as crowded and as much as in a big city.

My gaze was fixed on a house with a window facing straight into the room of Brother Iyash. Last night the moon was right on top of it.

Last night Brother Edgar came out of my room without asking any more questions after I said that only Brother Iyash knows the way here. And this morning I saw him come home without saying goodbye at all.

“Cha,” call Grandma in front of my room door. I quickly got out of bed to open the door.

“Edgar, go home and say he has said goodbye to you.”

I was silent for a few seconds. Why would he lie?

“Cha?”

“Iya.” I'm nodding.

Grandma smile. “Why he should go home, whereas the house is crowded he is here.”

I took a deep breath. “So long she's gone, Grandma. Poor mother.”

“Oh is indeed his father where?”

I wish I could say that his father was Om Hasa. However, I realized that I did not need to interfere too far. My business is getting more complicated here.

“But, grandma is happy to have you here.” Grandma grabbed my arm. “Home so scented.”

I smiled clumsyly. “If there is a brother Edgar house so crowded, there is a house so fragrant Icha, continue if there is a sister Iyash home so what? Freezing?”

Grandma laughing. “Iyash isn't that cold. Yuk, meet Iyash. Bear you don't want breakfast if it's not the handler who bribes.”

“Nek, but Icha–”

“Iya, Grandma knows. But, Iyash must take medicine.” I don't know what Grandma knows. I was afraid to make him sad, so I followed all the signs.

In front of the door of the room that was open I stared. Grandma had already entered the room.

“In the morning, the light of the sun enters Iyash's room. So, you can all sunbathe,” said Grandma. Then he looked at me. “Icha, come quickly, Iyash is hungry.”

Iyash just sat quietly on the bed. I slowly approached and sat down at his feet. Then I took a bowl of warm porridge and began to feed it. I'm lazy to talk if it leads to tension and provokes a fight. So, I better shut up and save my energy.

Until the porridge runs out, Iyash didn't talk to me either. I want this activity to be finished quickly, so I quickly give him medicine. Meanwhile, Grandma was sitting on the sofa watching our freezing. After I finished feeding Sister Iyash, Grandma came out first and I followed her immediately.

“What because there is Grandma, you guys so keep quiet?” ask Grandma when we were together in the kitchen.

“Maybe.”

“You also why keep quiet? Kayak doll runs out of battery,” sloth Grandma.

I smile. “My community with Sister Iyash is not healthy anymore, Nek.”

“Oh, he was jealous to see you with Edgar last night.”

“Ngarang,” snorted me while sitting near the table. It is undeniable that my spirit was lost after Brother Edgar left.