Chastity of Shahadah
Chapter 37 I WANT TO BE HOLY
HAPPY READING
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"I'm sorry mama, mama doesn't know, please don't discuss this first, mama doesn't know Suci" said mama Larasati with a hoarse voice held back and soft. His heart was broken and it felt like it had been pierced by a sharp thorn.
Zhein lifted the Holy body from the base of Larasati.
"We rest in the room, you must be tired baby, do I need to carry?" zhein said so gently as he wiped Holy tears.
The saint shook his head, then got up and walked towards his room with Zhein.
While Mother Jihan hugged the body of Larasati who was helpless, and swept it toward the sofa to make it more comfortable.
"Don't get drawn into the sadness baby, I know exactly how you feel right now. Trying to understand everything that happens to us. There is a mas who always accompanies you Saints. Share your grief with your. Mas promise will help find who your real father is." said Zhein steadily, while opening the sacred niqab that has been wet with tears and then lay it down.
The saint simply fell silent and obeyed. His soul was deeply shaken to hear Papa Leo's statement. Then who am I? The saint woke up again and was about to stand up.
"Where are you going, Holy?" said soft Zhein.
"I want an explanation from mama, mas." said Suci still crying.
"Let mama Larasati calm her heart and mind first. Later we ask again." said Zhein softly while hugging Suci and then kissed her cheek.
"Yuk we sleep first, mas is also tired, later in the afternoon we go home, let it be a bit fresh" said Zhein while bringing Suci to sleep next to him.
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"Already Jeng Laras, it's the past, don't remember. Now repent before it's too late. Allah is Most Forgiving and Most Merciful. Let Jeng Laras more calm and cool. If you want to tell a story, I am ready to listen to Jeng Laras" said the mother slowly while rubbing the back of Larasati slowly.
"I'm ashamed of you Jeng Jihan. I'm like a cheap woman who just needs a man's affection. I dropped my pride, humiliated my extended family by casting this disgrace on me. I was even ashamed of Suci and myself. I don't deserve to be here Jeng Jihan." Larasati said regretfully.
Larasati really slumped. The regret that always comes at the end makes his chest so tight considering the events in the past. His life goal was extinct, nothing more that Larasati hoped for now.
"Jeng Laras, Allah SWT is All-good, Allah SWT always gives tests according to the ability of his servant. Jeng Laras is a woman of choice, a strong and tough woman. Jeng Jihan must have life motivation and rise from all adversity. Desire from the heart to be better. QIBILTU... Jeng Laras certainly can and can, I must help Jeng Laras" Mother Jihan assured.
"Help me to be like a saint. Jeng Jihan can help me?" ask Larasati sincerely.
"Jeng Laras seriously? no more kidding, right?" mother Jihan said reassuringly.
Because a religion is not to play, but to be believed. Never emigrate because of A, B or C but because of yourself and because of Allah SWT.
"Jeng Jihan knows, I used to be a Muslim, I was good at teaching and often taught. My relationship has gone wrong since I was in High School, my life has gone wild and free. To this day, I am devastated that I have abandoned Allah SWT. I don't know what demon was ruling me. But I now realize that after seeing Saints, I am happy to see my son happy. I don't know who his father is. Why am I so stupid that I don't know who the Holy Father is." said Larasati.
"Make everything a Jeng Laras lesson. I will help you, just as I helped Holy to seek his guidance because of Allah SWT." said Mother Jihan.
"Your mother is your past. Your way of life is your destiny. And that path of my life is my destiny. If we sincerely accept destiny, then there will be wisdom behind all this." said mother Jihan softly.
"Thank you Jeng Jihan. When can I guide Ms. Ustadzah?" mama Larasati said with a big smile.
"How about if the study is quarantined at my house, follow me to the house, later let Zhein prepare everything" said Mother Jihan.
"It is with great pleasure that I prepare to be ready first, and say goodbye to Atmojo's mother" Larasati said.
After telling all of Larasati's wishes of migration to Atmojo's mother, they returned to Jihan and Zhein's mother's house.
Suci who was initially surprised by the wishes of mama Larasati also supported the hijra process. So even with Zhein giving thanks because all problems have a way out. One thing that still stands out is Who the Holy Father is.
Saints have begun to calm down and have accepted his condition, maybe with the passage of time all will be answered. Maybe mama Larasati needs time to calm herself down.
The journey to Zhein's house felt very long. Zhein who had hugged me earlier made my heart calm. Being in the arms of the husband it feels like being watered by rain water so it feels cool. Sometimes I felt the kiss of the lips of Zhein who landed beside me. How light my burden, like Zhein know what my mood booster is.
"Mas Zhein your embrace is so warm, I'm comfortable if like this continues, as if the burden on my shoulder is gone baby" I said softly right in his ear.
I'm embarrassed if I have to sound mama Larasati and mother Jihan can be teased out in the car.
"You like me hugging my wife like this? do it every moment and every day, my chest will always be there for you. I love u humairahku." said Zhein no less shrewd right on my face as well while chuckling small and pecking my forehead.
Simple but can make this heart float and very happy. Genuine intimacy is not out of lust. Awareness that is fostered in order to maintain harmony. Awareness that must be expressed in order to establish communication and honesty. The intimacy that was brought from Allah SWT to the family of Sakinah Mawadah and Warahmah.
"Stay with me, whatever happens" Holy said to her husband and then buried his face in his chest.
"Mas will always be there for you, no matter what happens, I will never leave you my wife" Zhein said steadily, peeling Holy's forehead until it was wet.
Suci was only silent to get friendly treatment from her husband. His heart was very happy, such attention looked simple but was done with sincerity.
Later you will realize having a partner who understands religion, much better than having a partner who only understands world science.
***Everyone has the right to change. A bad past is not a barrier to being better than what was once bad.
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THANK YOU FOR COVERING READ
JAZAKALLAH KHAIRAN
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