Believe me, I'm Still Sacred

Chapters 14. Beginning to fall in love

POV Raihan

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To my knowledge, every human being has a conscience. With the heart, humans can feel various emotions, such as love and happiness. But not infrequently the heart also, feels pain due to deep sadness. These feelings are influenced by situations or events experienced by a person. Words about the heart can make us more sensitive to various emotions.

The human heart is often complicated and difficult to explain in words. Let alone understanding the contents of the hearts of others, understanding the contents of their own hearts is sometimes a difficult thing to do. The reason is, the heart can feel a variety of emotions that can change easily. Moreover, everyone also has a different level of sensitivity.

And now my heart is feeling all that, feeling how complicated something is about love, happiness and hurt.

...Kalima Zahwa Jawharah's.......

She was the woman I loved, the first time I saw her in the Calabrian family home. At that time she was still an innocent and innocent little girl. Her demeanor was adorable and made me unable to forget her, moreover our first meeting was very impressive to me. I don't know if it works for him, too, or not.

The first meeting was in the backyard of the Calabrian family home, when I was walking there. Suddenly someone fell from above, beating my body. I called him a ghost because he was wearing white and came out of nowhere.

"You're not dead?" asked the little girl and looked at me with both of her innocent eyes.

I pinched the little girl's chubby cheek. "A-oh..duh sick tau! Why did you pinch me?" the little girl was in pain.

"Beautiful, I'm not a ghost!" I said with a smile. Yes, this little girl in front of me is indeed very beautiful.

I was amazed this time I saw there was a woman who could climb a tree, very great and she was also a beautiful girl.

"I'm pretty? You're the third person to say I'm beautiful" I saw the little girl smiling sweetly as she looked at me.

"Then the first person and both?" Askaqua.

"My father is the same as Bima" the little girl replied honestly. "If Rey and Zayn's sister always say I'm cute" the little girl muttered in her small, adorable voice.

Our plain eyes stared at each other for quite a while. Until then..."I'm sorry, I accidentally got hurt? Is anyone sick?" he looked at my face, probably to see if anyone was hurt there. "Seeing from our height difference, it's like you're older than me. So I'll just call you brother, huh, hehe." said the little girl again.

I stood up and stretched my hand out to him. "Rayhan, my name is Rayhan. You who?"

"My name-" when he was about to introduce himself to me, someone already called his name and indirectly told me his name.

I met Zahwa and his twin brother Zayn. Our family also has a good relationship and often if match us. At that time I only considered the matchmaking speech was just a wind then, because when I was a child I had not thought about it at all.

From then on, I became friends with both of them and so often interacted with both of them. Even I deliberately moved schools to where Zahwa and Zayn went to school. At first we were just friends, I was also quite close to Zahwa and Zayn, then over time my race changed to Zahwa when I stepped in 2nd grade High School. When I saw one of my friends have a crush on her and gave her a love letter. In my heart I feel like I'm on a prick, it feels tight. Yes, at that moment I realized that this is what is called jealousy and my heart felt what is called love.

Yes, no wonder if Zahwa likes a lot, she is beautiful, kind, cheerful, friendly and the person is friendly, even in a little tomboyish. Including some of my friends who like it, but Zahwa rejected them because he did not want to date. Even if related to men, Zahwa said that he wanted to get married immediately instead of dating.

Then, until my graduation day, I decided to say love to Zahwa. Of course not a date, but a serious one. I also planned something involving his twin brother, Zayn. When I say love, Zayn and his friends help me make a moment together with Zahwa right on her 16th birthday to coincide with my graduation day.

I saw Zahwa standing in the middle of the school hall alone under the darkness. Before long the lights were flashing, which was the surprise that Zayn and all his friends made. Then I saw her beautiful face smiling at all that. We all came out of hiding, wishing you a happy birthday and bringing a chocolate cake mixed with strawberries with lighted candles. Indeed, events like this are not a tradition in Islam, but just think of it as an exclamation.

"Yes dek, I know. I won't do anything." I looked at Zahwa nervously, scratching my non-itchy head.

"Keep..why did you bring me here?" ask Zahwa.

I took a breath, then I stopped him. "Zahwa.I love you."

I saw Zahwa's face blushing red, he was stunned with round eyes. I finally declared my love for Zahwa. "Sir Raihan..."

"Wait on! Don't talk yet. I used to say yes," I interjected. Actually I was afraid of rejection, so I asked Zahwa to shut up first.

"I just wanted to say that I like big brother too, but I don't want to date!"

Masya Allah's... Allahuahbar!

Oh God, is this really what I heard? Zahwa likes me too. The vow! Right now my heart is beating so fast, it's so hard to control this feeling that's about to explode. Zahwa seems to have the same feelings as me, thank God.

"Zahwa. Sister just wanted to say that brother loves you, brother wants. someday you become a mother."

Zahwa looked at me with a frown. "Sister will go to school in Cairo after this, I hope you will wait for brother. And after you get home, you'll talk to your parents."

As if understanding my words, Zahwa smiled sweetly. He nodded his head. Maybe no longer need to be said with words, because we already understand each other where the relationship direction our relationship. I intend to propose to her after graduation, I want to make Zahwa the only empress in my life. Tying it up with a marriage relationship.

Yes, after that I went to Cairo to continue my education. While there, Zahwa and I always reported via email, sending photos to each other. After being separated for 4 years, I returned to Jakarta and immediately asked my family to propose to Zahwa. They agreed, then proposed to Zahwa for me.

Everything was fine, until the photo Salimah brought brought brought a huge controversy on my wedding day and Zahwa. Honestly, I don't really care if the photo is true or not. I don't doubt his sanctity at all, but my family is too fanatical. Zahwa is heartbroken, I can feel that.

Then I caught something wrong with my family, when Abah and Abi told me they had betrothed me to ustadz Burhan's daughter. Did they plan this from the beginning? Astagfirullah! If it is true, they are absolutely outrageous. Conditions about polygamy that I cannot accept either. I know the pain of women in polygamy, like my mother Almh. I know I want to hurt a woman by beating her.

But I try not to care what Abah and my brother say. Because I will fight for my love and Zahwa and avoid polygamy as much as possible.

Today after teaching, I plan to contact Zahwa. I hope Zahwa answers it, because it's been 2 days since we had a problem. The beautiful girl who had captivated my heart did not answer me for a message or a phone call.

Bismillah, may Zahwa pick up my phone.

Tut's....Tut's....

I heard a ringing sound. Shortly thereafter....

"Assynoltom..."

...*****...