The Pledge of Love Embroidered Heaven

CHAPTER 51. Love Actually

I fell silent while playing the tip of the nail on the lap. The tip of my thumb's fingernail was against the tip of my index finger. If heard carefully there will be a sound of friction heard.

"What exactly are you looking for Nisa? What do you want? Your behavior has embarrassed us!" Mother spoke with overflowing emotions.

Dad took a deep breath. "Mommy's done. Emotions are the work of Satan. Now I sit down, calm down. With emotion all will not be finished." Dad was worried and dizzy to see the mother who was always angry from the background.

"Dad, who wouldn't be angry if his son made a terrible mistake. Even great sins have been committed against her own husband!" said the mother after sitting again on the sofa chair opposite me. His eyes stared hard.

I quietly bowed deeply, my eyes constantly staring at the floor.

"Nisa, here, son." Dad patted the chair next to him, telling me to sit next to him.

I followed and stepped up, then sat down right next to my father. The one that I salute from my father at a time like this father can still speak softly unlike the mother who continues to hustle and rise in blood.

"Is it because of that compulsion that Nisa did her?"

I was silent, still not answering my question.

"Not Well, out of love" mother's chirps suddenly made me feel guilty.

"Mother!" Dad threw a glaring gaze, making mom stop her sneer.

"Son, Nisa's big. It's been 18 years. Nisa must know son, which is good to do and which is bad. The good do it and the bad do not do it" said the father.

Mom's face was upset. He was heavy. "Dad was too gentle with her! Look at that father's upbringing. He grew up to be a foolish and spoiled child."

I squinted my eyes at Mom. Give a code so that he can talk to his son first. Facing something is necessary with a cold head. Even the decisions made are not wrong.

Dad took a deep breath.

"If Nisa knows, love is actually just a complementary spice. The most important thing in a marriage is intention. Marriage is intended to follow the sunnah rasullullah and only expect ridho from God alone. Marriage is the longest worship we have to live, son. Then we should marry the right person. People who can work together to get to heaven"

Mom's eyes are pointing towards the wall clock. "Dad don't have to ramble like that, no matter how we advise him, he will repeat it again." Mother speaking. Mother was furious to see her husband who did not just talk directly to the point about what they would agree to before returning to Indonesia.

I looked at my mother and father's faces in turn.

"Dad, Nisa claimed to have sinned and was wrong. Nisa promises to break through that mistake, and will try to be a good wife to Nisa's husband." I feel my eyes start to dew.

Dad rubbed my head. "It's good that Nisa did do that."

Hamidah's mother looked at her husband's face, then poised steadily. "Nisa, father and mother have decided, will convey all this with Hamzah's family and apologize profusely."

I gasp. "Ma... I mean, I want to tell Azzam and his family everything about what Nisa's doing" I said in disbelief.

"Yes. I'll tell you about Nisa's relationship with Fey." Mother swallowed her saliva, then continued to say, "Once upon a time we will bring Nisa back to live with her father and mother in Singapore."

I was shocked to hear my mother's words.

"Mother, Nisa has nothing to do with Fey." I said honestly, with eyes beginning to dew. "Nisa is not going to Singapore! Nisa wants it here"

"Mom doesn't care if you still have a relationship or not with Fey. What we want right now is for you to be honest with your husband. In domestic relationships there are no lies to hide!"

"It's time to just argue. Now prepare! We're leaving now," added the mother.

I guess mom's authoritarian nature is starting to disappear, but it's not. Mother still behaves like that, organizes everything and she always wants it to go her way. But actually behind that nature, the mother is also the same as other women, she is also a crook. Even though it was not too revealing and was only hidden through his harsh attitude.

***

Fifteen minutes later, the car was parked in front of my in-laws.

Tok...

Shortly after, a male figure appeared behind the door.

I smiled as I kissed her hand.

"Assalamu'alaikum"

He smiled back and returned my greetings. "Wa'alaikumsalam, Nisa how are you?"

"Nisa, fine. Brother how?"

"Thank God, as Nisa sees today."

I approached one step. Shaking my hand as it touched his clean face. Don't know, my instincts are eager to do that. My eyes looked at his face with a happy look. I have missed the man in front of me for three days.

There was no stopping my netra staring and observing Azzam's face. I miss her beautiful face for me to look at and touch. Missed to pray together, missed when he kept scolding me if I got up late to perform the five prayers.

For a while now, I even admitted this man in front of me was charismatic. I still curl my lips upwards. There's something else in me that makes me happy.

"Angin, Nisa—"

Azzam suddenly hugged me. "Dreams you!" said Azzam, clutching tightly to my body.

I returned the warm embrace. Actually I wanted to say the word first, but Azzam had already said that longing sentence.

"Sama, Nisa too," I said in return for Azzam's embrace. Burning his head in the chest of his field. Feeling very comfortable in his arms.

I closed my eyes. "That's never far from Nisa."

Azzam rubbed my head. "Nisa's right, want that from brother?"

I nodded with a happy smile. Then slowly release the embrace of Azzam. Put my right hand on his chest. "Never lose this love for Nisa" I said steadily. Then my left hand took Azzam's right hand and placed it on my chest. "And this heart shall belong to my brother" I said with a smile.

Azzam doesn't believe in any of this. Many times he tried to digest about the situation he was facing at the moment. About what he just caught in his ear drum.

"What did you hear this isn't wrong, Nisa?"

"No, not at all" I said confidently.

Azzam pulled the corner of his lips. A smile immediately flashed. I could see his eyes twinkling.

Azzam's hand grabbed my hand that was still attached to his chest, then kissed the back of the hand with a friendly.

I rubbed Azzam's right cheek and smiled. Our eyes locked for a moment. The sound of crickets at night is like trying to tease us both. But it had no effect at all. The two of us even enjoyed it and thought of it as a melodious chant circling the two of us.

"Lho has arrived. How can I not hear?" Umi's voice that appeared suddenly made me and Azzam cut off eye contact.

Umi made a sound from the direction of the room and walked out to us still wearing mukena. Maybe Umi has run out of praying isya. "Where are Ahsan and Hamidah, Nisa?"

"There's Umi, that's." My eyes led to my father and mother walking side by side in the back.

"Assalamu'alaikum" greetings father and mother together.

"Wa'alaikumsalam." Azzam warmly welcomed his in-laws while crucifying one by one hand who were also considered as his own parents.

"Please come in" Umi invited.

Mom and Dad stepped in. Azzam told them to sit down.

"I went inside for a while, would change clothes first. We just did the Isya prayer," said Umi after passing back into his room.

"Azzam, this please take you inside huh. A little by little," the mother smiled, handing over the paperbag she was carrying.

Azzam greeted him, and disappeared towards the kitchen.

I looked at mom. My feelings began to be anxious, perhaps exceeding the anxiety of the person to be executed by the law of beheading. Yes, tonight I'll be executed. My eyes closed tightly. Unable to imagine, the Azzam family would definitely be angry and disappointed with his son-in-law.

Before long Azzam and Umi came out to bring a tray of drinks, brownies and chocolate pudding. Then put it on the guest table.

"Oh, don't bother," said the unpleasant mother.

"Ah, no problem, Hamidah."

Looking around, Ahsan was looking for someone. "Where's Hamzah?" Father asked his brother.

"Assalamu'alaikum" said someone in the doorway, wearing a koko dress subordinate sarong complete with peci decorate his head.

"Wa'alaikumsalam" we said as we stood up.

"Well, long life. Just now Ahsan asked her," said mother laughing.

"Well, guests from afar are already data apparently." Hamzah approached and greeted father and mother.

Ahsan's father chuckled while hugging Hamzah.

"When did you arrive?" ask Hamzah.

"So it was 3pm."

Hamzah nodded. "Azzam just arrived." Hamzah. "Jam 7 huh, Zam?" ask me to look at Azzam.

Azzam said the word abah.

A moment later Hamzah chuckled and let us sit down again. Ahsan who also laughed. It seems that they really enjoyed everything they talked about, while I was here sitting glued and anxious.

For me, it's time to wrap up all the stories with the two men in my life. If not now the end will be a lot of hearts that will be hurt. Although removing one will still hurt someone. Fey was a victim of my mistakes and stupidity. I realize that. I regret why I am still in that relationship. Why don't I forget about him and pay attention to him. Why am I so impatient waiting for that feeling to come.

"Nih tasting cake made by umi, delicious." Azzam gave me a piece of brownie.

"I... Iy..iya" I was blown away to welcome the Azzam cake.

A cell phone ringing. That's the ringing of Azzam's cell phone.

A call came in from a number that was no stranger to him. The number that has been several days calling and asking for news. Azzam still looked at him in silence.

"Who?" I asked when I saw Azzam silently staring at the phone.

Azzam shifted his position by bringing his head closer while whispering. "Lydia's Mom"

"Yes, lift it up" I said flatly.

Azzam shifted the green panel, but before that he paid to pick up the phone with a little away.

My eyes were trailing Azzam's body as he walked to the front of the terrace. I think Azzam was always telling the truth about what he did, including about Ms. Lydia who always contacted him.

My brain is spinning to digest everything. God has his own way of making me realize. Breaking up with Fey and giving his full love to Azzam was the right choice to rebuild my household palace with Azzam.

It's God's destiny, we get married is God's destiny... The words of Azzam were again ringing in my ears.

Azzam's right. I should have accepted this fate. I should have fought harder from the start to learn to accept it and open my heart to Azzam, so I didn't have to betray Azzam.

From the outside, Azzam suddenly went inside at a fast pace and in a hurry. Azzam stared with a fiery blaze. I don't get it.

"Well, talk to me for a second! Come with Brother!" whiskey Azzam.

Azzam circulated his gaze to his abah and umi, as well as his in-laws. "I'm sorry for a minute"

Then dragged me out.

"Why?"

"What happened at school?" Spotlight the unusual eyes of Azzam.

"No... There's no." I shook my head.

"This what?" Azzam shows screenshots of facebook messages.

"Who did you get that from?"

"From Lydia's mother"

"Honestly one side brother could not bear if Nisa was blasphemed with harsh words like this. But, another thing you're disappointed with Nisa's attitude."

I frowned.

"Why can Nisa be dating Fey, when we're married. At first my brother was suspicious about your friendship that my brother thought was unnatural. But, brother tepis all that, brother is still trying to suudzon. The reality is that my brother's guess has been right all along." Azzam threw away his gaze, after finishing his sentence.

"Abang, but it was yesterday. Now Nisa has nothing to do with Fey. Nisa's already buried deep about the relationship that once intertwined." I swallowed my saliva with great difficulty. "Nisa's been wrong in taking Nisa's feelings all along," I said in a choked voice.

Now I understand one thing that being with Fey is not love but a sense of need because of habituation. The mistake is that feeling is love, but it is not. Because love should not make itself fall into a greater error and right love should not make itself sinful.

True love is the love that Azzam gives. Which makes me obedient and close to God.

Azzam closed his eyes then massaged his temple, feeling dizzy. After which, he took a deep breath, throwing it away slowly.

"That means all this time?"

I bite my lower lip, trying hard.

"Yes" I replied with a heavy heart. After that I quietly bowed lethargic, my leg bones felt weak.

Azzam did not know what to say. There are many words that want to say but only stuck at the tip of the tongue. Azzam's tongue suddenly shriveled.

Perhaps God did not allow Azzam to take the oath, or rebuke the woman who became his wife.

Azzam chose to leave, leaving me frozen.

Seeing Azzam leave, I followed him. I know how she feels now. More pain than I felt when I was bullied, reviled, rebuked by a schoolmate. Azzam was certainly disappointed and angry.

I'm evil. I hurt Azzam. A place where I can reach my paradise.

I took a quick step, following his long steps.

"But! Brother" call me while holding Azzam's arm.

The man jerked my hand and threw away his face.

"What happened to Nisa first." I again tried to grab Azzam's arm and turn Azzam's body so that it faced me. But he still refuses to see me.

"Look Nisa," I said softly. He still doesn't budge.

My right hand touched the soft cheek of Azzam. I turned my face so I could see him.

"Abang, Nisa admitted that she was wrong and had been disobeying her husband. And now Nisa was not expecting another man, other than the man who was in front of Nisa at the moment. Who made his first pledge to be a companion to his wife forever."

Azzam now stared back. "Abang is not an angel, not a man like Nisa wants, so now go with the man of your choice. Brother will not puff. Please!" Vibrating Azzam's lips as he spoke the sentence, his eyes also glazed over. While I was sobbing softly as Azzam flowed his sentence.

My hands down took Azzam's hands. Grasping it tightly, a gesture that I did not want to let go at all. I always wanted to be with him.

"She's sorry. Give Nisa a chance to be a good wife back for brother. Nisa, promise will give everything including what kind of love you have given to Nisa."

Lama Azzam was silent, then decided to put his hands away and go by leaving me who was still wailing sadly in the night mist. There was nothing bad when Azzam chose to ignore me.

I stared at Azzam's departure with a sad look. Unknowingly my tears fell back, I tried to wipe them with my thumb. My chest feels tight. I kept staring at his disappearance until Azzam's back vanished from my sight.

What should I do now. It's the first time in my life I've seen Azzam that angry. I was sitting on the ground, my shoulders shaking when I was still trussing. Until dad came to embrace me.

"Son, return. Dad's here."

I looked up at Dad, then hugged him.

"Dad" muttered. I held Dad tightly.

"Nisa, Azzam needs time. Let him calm down."

"Would you like to come back, Nisa?" I said while sobbing.

"God willing, all Nisa needs to do right now is pray to God. Now let's go home" said the father, lifting up my body that was still resting on the ground. Mom was standing behind me, feeling sorry. He could not bear to see his daughter sad. Accept reality.