The Pledge of Love Embroidered Heaven

CHAPTER 27. Guilt

“Abang!” I blocked his arm when I knew he was leaving.

Azzam.

“Nisa, sorry,” said I feel guilty.

“Sorry, why?”

I hugged her. This is the first time I've done this to him, how else would I be afraid that he would get angry and not accept.

Azzam frowned.

“Nisa, why? Not usually like this. If the brother approaches, Nisa will refuse and always stay away. What's going on this time?”

He was certainly more shocked and more clueless about what his wife was doing at the moment.

“Actually. Actualaaa ..”

“Actually, what?” azzam asked without understanding.

My eyes are closed strong.

“Actually Nisa lied.”

“Long?” tanyanya's confused.

I let go of my embrace, then nodded.

“Lying about?”

I'm grinning. “Lying about Nisa doesn't remember everything.”

I saw the look on Abang Azzam's face change instantly. Highlighting his eyes as if to emphasize he really did not like the joke I made, he quickly rewinded his footsteps a few steps away from me who was standing before him at this moment. He looked down with two hands holding the temple.

For a few seconds, he turned his body. Cold gazing.

“Nisa!” He said as if he was holding something out of his mouth.

I'm down. Dare not look him in the face.

So long I waited for the words to come out of his mouth, but in vain. He didn't say a word. Azzam chose to leave me in the room.

I raised my head back.

“Abang!”

“Abang!”

He didn't call me.

Instantly the door thudded, as it closed violently from his attitude it seemed like he was really angry.

I'm biting the end of my nails.

“Nisa, Azzam why?”

Suddenly Umi went into the room, when she saw Azzam coming out in a hurry. I hit my body sitting on the edge of the bed. My eyes were blank. Not long ago Umi also sat next to me.

“You have a storm?”

I rubbed my face rough, then turned my head.

“Umi, Brother like angry Umi. How?”

Umi sighed, then shrugged her shoulders a sign of not knowing.

“Nisa, who must Nisa know that your brother is indeed often joking, throwing jokes. But solely that he used to make the people around him smile and laugh. We must be careful when joking or just harassing others because things that are made excessive can be bad. We never know the content of one's heart whether the joke is within reasonable limits or will even hurt others, until in the end it becomes the root of the quarrel. Umi believes Nisa must know the character of Azzam right from the beginning, you guys have been friends since childhood.”

Umi stroked my shoulder.

“Already Nisa, she will not linger at home to inhabit, Nisa.” Umi's smile, trying to cheer up.

“Umi, get out first,” he continued after that.

I stared hard, with my head bowed deeply. The silence in this room is like being judgmental of my actions. While outside the twilight red copper with a yellowish sun ball like it was ready to be swallowed night.

***

I took a deep breath.

Slowly, slowly, my feelings are now a little calm. The wind participating refreshes my mind. I still feel at home in the garden next to the house, where I used to be alone when my feelings and thoughts did not want to link.

I look up occasionally to the sky. Only he faithfully accompanies and comforts me tonight. The night breeze continued to hit my body, I don't know what time it is now that obviously I have not been reluctant to go into the house still at home to survive here until my mind is satisfied.

Aerphone mounted in the ear. I played the song at the loudest volume, so I could not hear anything around me including the sound of crickets that were never absent every night. My thin lips twitched following the chant of the song that was playing from the aerphone. Occasionally sometimes a loud wind comes wiggling incandescent lights that hang in the corner of the park. The wind dropped the leaves that had begun to roast on the branches of the tree, then rolled around flying at will. I rubbed my arms to ward off the cold feeling that gradually began to drift even though my body was already wearing a sweater jacket.

***

Tonight Azzam is out with Marvin to meet some of the teams they have formed in advance for the training activities to be held three days ahead. They are holding a small meeting to discuss the event of School Leadership Training and Education Management which will be held in Balikpapan. The event they arranged was specially sponsored by BMH Balikpapan in collaboration with Karang Bugis Islamic School and Gunung Tambak Education. In this activity, of course, the teams want the activity to run smoothly in accordance with the agenda that has been proclaimed. They are very concerned about it, because the participants who will be present or sent are the heads of schools and their representatives and some potential teachers from various regions.

“I have contacted Ustadz Habib Ghofar he said he agreed that the first material raised is a matter of performance assessment by others and to yourself, and Ustadz Habib Ghofar himself who will fill the material. How?” Marvin delivered his proposal.

Joseph held his hand up into the air. “Sip, in my opinion it's a very good topic and quite strategic because now many people who judge someone are just stuck on subjectivity so I think that the need for a measuring tool related to integrity, the, loyalty and self-quality.”

“Good, for the other team how did it go?” tanya Marvin is back as the chairman who is leading the discussion tonight.

While the other friends were busy discussing designing the training implementation which is only a few weeks away. But Azzam was still meditating with his own thoughts. He could not bring his mind to concentrate on listening to what Marvin and the rest of the team were saying. Everything Marvin explained and said as the leader of the discussion tonight was only responded with a nod of the head.

His mind was still hovering at the incident this afternoon. He should not have revealed it all in front of Dhanisa, about his feelings of long-buried love. But it really could not be prevented, at that time he was really emotional. How not he did it to guide his wife's memory that she was legally owned by him through marriage, how could she forget it. However, after knowing that he was just a charade made Azzam feel played. Azzam always wanted to vent his frustration but he was never able and empowered to do that to the person he had chosen to accompany as his life companion.

“Azzam?” Marvin called.

He's still knocking his pen to the table.

Joseph nudged Azzam's shoulder gently, coincidentally he was sitting right beside him.

“Iya, why?” tanyanya.

“Can be submitted for case study material?” pinta Marvin's.

Azzam snorted, then opened his notebook that was spread out on the table.

“For his case study material is Ustadz Muzakkir, he will test participants in solving problems, deciding problems and problem solving creativity. It was time from noon to afternoon,” he explained. “This material is actually simple but strategic to know the power of reason and the ability to solve problems,” continued Azzam back.

Marvin nodded and felt satisfied after listening to Azzam's explanation.

“For the time in the morning that the creation of a paper with the theme of skill, after completion will be held an interview by an interview team consisting of four teams. Two ustadz teams and two ustadzah teams with a duration of 15-20 minutes each,” continued Marvin took over the talk again on the preparation of the time duration.

After the discussion it was felt that enough Marvin as appointed in leading this discussion ended his small meeting activities.

“I think our team meeting, we'll suffice first. I hope we can maintain the cohesiveness for the sake of the implementation and success of this event.”

While the other friends one by one began to leave, Azzam still cleared up some of the sheets of paper that became the agenda of the meeting. Without Azzam realizing actually Marvin from earlier was watching him. In his mind he knew it seemed like something was going through his team-mate.

“Zam, healthy?” ask Marvin to investigate.

“Iya,” the answer is short, while busy tidying up piles of books and papers.

Marvin sat on the table crossing his hands in front of his chest.

“Don't know, maybe it's just my feeling. Why do you look any different today? Is there a problem?”

Azzam. “No.”

Marvin laughed softly as he patted his friend's shoulder.

“Hey, I know an Azzam never closes like this. He always wanted to share his story. When I am confused about my own problems if it always gives advice that we have to go through this life patiently, because life always trains us to always be patient in dealing with something. Yes right?” He elbowed with Azzam's shoulder jail.

Azzam sat back in his chair. He was still confused whether to tell it all. Azzam saw Marvin still faithfully waiting for him to open his mouth. Marvin continued to glare at Azzam hoping that he could quickly get a little in the story so that he did not have to spend half his night's rest just to wait for Azzam to open his mouth. Finally, Azzam gave up there was no other choice but with Marvin who had been helping each other and exchanging ideas with each other.

The story Azzam delivered occasionally in reply Marvin with a small nod, and at the end of the story Marvin just chuckled while breaking the table. Seeing his friend's reaction made Azzam confused. Is there anything funny about this story? Though he had been telling a serious story there was no comedy element in it. Why did he laugh until he held his stomach.

Azzam frowned.

“You why? Stomach pain?”

“Iya I have a stomachache,” reply Marvin by still bending over holding his stomach that hurts from holding a laugh. “I have a stomachache because of the story you brought earlier.”

Azzam did not understand, he felt sorry to tell it to Marvin. This one friend if he is serious, seriously not such a roll as earlier for example with full authority he leads the discussion and directs other team members like a director of the largest shareholders in Asia. But sometimes his attitude is so alternated with guyonan made by himself, maybe to expel fatigue over a piece of work that makes him stressed with a mind piled up.

“Have laughed?” asked Azzam who was upset. “Then let's go home!”

“Shortly, briefly. Don't go dong,” he said as Marvin patted Azzam's shoulder.

“Begini yes, I as a person who is more senior in building a household, a little bit already know how indeed in domestic life is not always smooth and harmonious, but also, there are-there are stumbling blocks when undergoing a household bathtub. Just think I'm your wife, a romantic wife.”

Azzam again frowned while changing his sitting position slightly. A romance? Where did he take his romantic side from? Azzam.

Marvin continued to say back, “Azzam I directly to the point only. He so could be just want to show that he also has a romantic side although sometimes jutek and hard. He just wants to test you if you really are a patient and sincere husband who loves him,” his tone this time is serious.

Azzam bengong, trying to digest.

“As if you are a smart person, that soan do not need to be brought dizzy. Come home! It's 10,” he said seeing the alroji clock attached to the hand.

“My wife's pity must have been waiting to take me to bed together,” Marvin's tease with a clumsy smile. “You don't want to go home? Surely your wife is the same as my wife who is also waiting for her husband to come home,” Marvin said again.

Azzam complied with Marvin's wish, which prompted him to return home immediately. One by one the lights were turned off. They both headed out to the parking lot.

***

The sound of motorcade still faithfully stormed the streets. Some of the young people seemed to be wandering out of their nests to hang out and convoy in the middle of the capital's streets that were glued with street lights. Several times their action was disbanded by patrol officers, but was held again in just a few minutes. It seems that they never had a snare despite frequent warnings from the police and strong reprimands from the surrounding residents because they often disturb their night sleep with the moans of the motorbike muffling noise.

About fifteen minutes of motorbike driven by Marvin swallowed a corner of the road and turned into a residential complex alley. Marvin and Azzam houses are indeed in the same direction only different blocks.

“Thank you. You don't want to stop by first?” bargain Azzam.

“No, it's late tonight. Not the time to visit but the time to rest,” said Marvin laughed softly.

“What's wrong with stopping by first.”

“No problem anyway, just my wife is waiting at home. I'm going home first.”

The roar of Marvin's motorbike engine again broke the stillness of the night.

Azzam quickly stepped into the house. However, just about to touch the door handle, his movement stopped for a moment when he found Nisa still sitting in the garden next to the house. He seemed to be swinging on an iron swing in the garden.

Hattchiii!!

His sneezing voice sounded. Azzam glanced at the watch in hand. At 10:12 minutes.

Not long after that another coughing sound that followed sounded.

Uhuk!

Uhuk!

Nisa's voice continued to cough as her right hand slowly hit the right chest with a small punch. Azzam stepped back inside. Not caring or about to sleep, he headed for the kitchen and came out again holding a glass of mineral water. He walked up to Nisa who was still sitting swinging with the aerphone still stuck to her ear.

My still itchy throat makes me cough without breaking. A moment suddenly a glass was present right in front of my eyes. The sight made my eyes blink in shock.

“Minum,” said the voice so that it forced my neck to turn to the side following the direction of the hand of the person who thrust the glass.

“Hurry up to drink,” he continued when he saw me who was still coughing but did not receive a drink from him.

I who really need water, do not care immediately take it and gulp quickly.

“Why is it still outside? Outside cold, go inside,” persuade Azzam.

“Abang why is here? You just don't have to go near," I said, then turned the eyeballs of other sight seekers.

“Why is that?”

“Iya. Kan brother was angry with Nisa this afternoon, and did not want to forgive, Nisa,” I said disappointed.

Azzam. He recalls Doctor Fredy's advice.

“Come! Nisa should be inside instead of here?” Azzam again pulled my wrist to get out of the swing and immediately entered.

“Apaan anyway!” I clucked in annoyance as I let go of his hand.

Azzam heaved heavily.

“Iya okay. I'm sorry, Nisa, now let's go in," he said softly.

I smiled.

“What? Nisa didn't hear,” said I pretended not to hear.

Azzam snorted and snatched away the aerphone attached to my ear.

“Iya, Brother forgive.”

In my heart I smiled happily, indeed that sentence was what I wanted to hear.

Hatchy!

Again I sneezed for the umpteenth time, making my nose red.

“Hah! Kan, who told you outside to look for disease only!” azzam grumbled.

I, too, who could not stand the cold of the air, finally relented and went inside the house.