The House in the Middle of Sawah

Heartbreak day

"Thank you for those of you who have stayed tune with Dani from four to six, we will meet again tomorrow in the same jam, take care of your health, keep your spirit, greetings the charm of Indonesian music. . .see you. .", I closed my broadcast this evening with a song by Yovie Nuno titled He's Mine.

She's for me

Not for you

She's mine

Not yours

Go away you

Don't you bother me

Let me approach it . . .

The song that helped me to be silent, to laugh, to think back to the figure of Erni.

Drrtt. .drrttt . . . drrttt . . .

Hp vibrates, there's a phone. I saw it on the hp screen, Febi. A little lazy I took a call from him. It's not her fault, she used to call to find out how I was. Not too often either, but enough to make me conclude Febi does have feelings for me.

"Halloo", I said first.

"Hallo Dan, I don't bother you?", Febi asked, stale.

"No, I'm out of the air, waiting for the broadcast after I haven't come, it's over yes cus go home" I replied flatly.

"Look, Lik Wo just called me, he said these weeks want to visit your house. How's it? No po po, right? You, when?"

Lik Wo yes, I re-remember my accident, my dreams, and my dysfunctional "share.

"Friday or Saturday Fe, how?", this time I was enthusiastic.

"Yes, I won't tell you", a few seconds of silence. "And can I ask you a question?", Febi opened her voice again.

"You. .you, like Erni?", Febi asked me something that surprised me, a question I didn't expect.

"You don't want to answer me, it's your privacy anyway, sorry I kepo. .hehe", Febi sounded laughing, when I was silent for a while not answering his question.

"Honest Fe . .yes, I like Erni. And I also just found out Erni is the same as Kak Iwan. It felt really bad. I had no more chance to get it", I replied, while once again remembering how Kak Iwan hugged Erni earlier. Kuraba my chest, there is pain there. Silent again, Febi did not respond to my words.

"Fee?", I called after a long silence.

"Eee-eehh, Yes Dan, sorry-sorry I was daydreaming", Febi replied, either her voice sounded a little quivering.

"Udah first yes, later we continue to talk, I want to go back first, or ati if you go home", Tuutt . . .Tuttt . . .Tuttt, the phone turned off Febi in a hurry. I was a little confused and didn't understand. He asked, I answered and turned off his phone.

Waiting for a few minutes, finally the broadcast officer after I came, Mas Henri.

"Sorry, late rods, new private lessons about", Mas Henri patted my shoulder.

"Yes, not pa pa pa, not too late either". I packed up to get home.

"Why, wes healthy really right?", asked Mas Henri while arranging the play list of songs on the computer screen.

"Aman mas, the outer wound is healed, the wound of my heart is open. .hahaha", I replied with a laugh, sounding guyon, but actually that's what happened.

"Hallaaahh, hachah" joked Mas Henri.

We laughed together.

After that I decided to go home. A little bit of a worry also come home at this hour. Because the last time I rode a motorcycle in this "Surup" hour, I ended up in the hospital. I drive my bike slowly, occasionally see the rearview motor, honestly I still parno. Past accidents, mystical events and my dreams, I still keep them as my secret. No one knows.

But thankfully, today the road was pretty rame, until I landed safely at home. When I got home, I washed my hands, face and feet and went into the room. Daily rituals, confine yourself in the room. From the window a faint moon shone in the sky. I want to go to bed soon, I want to forget about Brother Iwan and Erni. I want to forget about today.

Perhaps the coming of the night may forget you, but the morning of tomorrow will come with your smile, which shines brightly, yet is far from my reach and torments me . . .