Space Rainbow

Loving In Silence...

Author

Rainbow ran towards the hotel room where Wulan was, he kept knocking slowly on the door because he was worried if it was too loud. It will disturb the comfort of the other room occupants.

He continued to cry, as the various flavors mixed together into one.

Between anger, resentment, hate, shame and fear.

On himself.

But especially ashamed and afraid of his Lord.

At the end of the day, all he felt was regret.

His affection for Numbers caused him to lulch, and forget that the Owner of the Heart was Seeing what he was doing.

Maybe other people can't see what they're doing. But Allah is All-Seeing.

He sat down on the doorstep, regretting everything.Repent his mane that he had been guarding for a few days.. Be seen again by those who are not his makhrom.

Not separated from that, still serene sense because it turns out God still whispers faith in the chest and make him quickly realize, that earlier he could not hold back. There is a turmoil of despair that turns out to be sinful.

What makes him regret all too is, it turns out that he was actually the one who opened the way of the act.

Actually, what is this feeling?

How can love turn into an unexpected crazy desire?

How can feelings of affection about an emotional relationship turn into a physical one?

Is being an adult like this?

***

Meanwhile, the,

Space is sitting on the floor. Lamenting his stupidity because it has been persuaded by the devil.

Moreover, his guilt towards the Rainbow was getting bigger. Given how he had opened the hijab of the woman who unfortunately was without thinking long.

He also knew that the woman was learning to emigrate.

What would the rainbow think of her?

He's really frustrating.

Just one day they met and chatted, also have managed to eliminate misunderstandings for 2 years.

Just now, he was able to get close again to the first woman who managed to realize her about feelings of affection for someone.

But, in a few minutes. His depraved desire was destroying his hopes.

All he felt was regret.

***

Spacewalk

Last night, I couldn't close my eyes.

By morning, I was determined to apologize to Pela.

I grabbed the cell phone lying on the bed.

Typing sentence by sentence that I feel appropriate, to express the intent of the heart.

Angkasa: Sailor, I'm sorry!

Angkasa: I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

Space: I love you Mop..

Space: I just feel like.really missing you.

Space: Pela..

There's no reply. I also tried to make a call.

However, repeatedly trying to remain unattended.

Back typing messages,

Angkasa : Well Pel, if you don't want to reply or pick up my phone. But one thing you should know, I love you... I hope you don't misunderstand me and stay away from me.

I put the phone back on the bed, put myself down and think straight.

Hhh.

If you think again, we used to be like this, but somehow last night felt different.

Especially when I see Pela shed tears, why do I feel like a less aj** man who takes advantage of the situation.

In the past, Pela never had a problem when we touched.

But this time, I also realized and appreciated. Pela is no longer the old man..

He changed..

He emigrated.

And I have to respect his decision.

***

Rainbows

This morning, I was still devastated.

Besides being ashamed of the Owner of the Heart, I am also ashamed of the Numbers.

What does he think of me?

I really have smeared the meaning of 'hijab' that I wear.

Just steady, feel how delicious and cool to close the aura these few days, comes the temptation of 'feelings'.

Feelings that are passionate to someone without caring wrong or right.

So that it becomes unable to distinguish between haq and bathil.

"Duuh..seneng did you meet Angkasa?How long have you been in office? dong story last night where were you guys?Why aja? I could be home in the middle of the night! " Wulan strapped me with a lot of questions.

Last night when I went into my room, I decided to stop crying and pretend nothing happened.

Shamefully.. If my disgrace gets caught with Wulan!

"Eating in angkringan continue to walk to the hill Bintang... " My answer is short.

"Waaah.. Hepi is very rich.. "

It was indeed very happy Lan, to the point of forgetting herself!

"Hayuuk's.. We cus now yuk, hunt our clients come first.. " Take spirit.

Trying to eliminate the turmoil and arouse the spirit of this morning to work.

***

On travel.

"Eh. uh look at the Pel! This... There is no shame in his disgrace on social media! " Gerutu Wulan, while showing his social media pages.

"Huush! it's her business Lan.. "

"Yes, but there's no shame in that vein.. She's an actress, definitely in the spotlight of millions of Pel people.. Should be a public figure that can set a good example for his fans, what if what he does is even in the same way millions of people and consider the rich thing is ordinary.. ?"

"I've read..There are also those who even apostatize because of his love for his girlfriend.. And disgraceful that he is not virgin and may not release his girlfriend.. Athaghfirullah! "

"We pray that he will change, get Lan's guidance.. Not good ghibahin the living!Unless we grant the clear fire of the curse of Allah, or Qorun! " My words, while exploring cyberspace and looking for a lot of information about hijab.

"Hehe Iyah anyway.. " Wulan chuckled, then she went back to scrolling her medsos.

Hhh.

I remember how I and the Khilaf Figures were last night.

I opened it slowly and doubtfully, an article about love and courtship according to the Islamic view.

I do not know anything about 'love', had heard it had made me shudder amused.

It's true that I liked Numbers a long time ago, but I didn't think it would be in the phase of our relationship to become more emotional and badly to turn into a physical touch zone.

"The worst effect of blind love is infidelity. This is because the rights of loved ones blindly often clash with the rights of their Lord."

"In addition, blind love is very close to the valley of adultery. Where adultery is a great sin. Pezina will be subjected to a painful torment."

Deg.

I took a long breath.

"A man who does not think much and remember Allah Azza Wa Jalla, there must be a void in his heart." 

"This empty space will be the nesting place of love for other than Him."

"If this is left, over time this empty space will expand. It can be said that people who have experienced blind love will be more and more ‘bucin’ and include the class of people who are negligent."

"It is illegal for Muslim men and women to exchange views or in this case for adultery."

"The feeling of wanting to be together, the desire to be in physical contact, and so on. Thus it can obscure the essence of love and replace it with nafs*."

I looked at the road, sighed a few times and Wulan just looked at me in wonder.

Many times my phone vibrated, there were incoming messages and calls.

Turns out, you sent me a lot of messages and called dozens of times.

But there was not a single message I read.

Don't I intend to change?

I want to learn to be a good Muslim.

Did not the Prophet Shallallahu'alaihi wa sallam once say:

"The world is a jewel, and the best jewel of the world is the wife of the sholeh." - (HR Muslim)

Women should not be like the moon that everyone can see without being covered in anything.

But women are supposed to be like the sun which makes the eyes bow before looking at it.

And the Muslim woman who is kind and wise in her character, like a pearl in the seventh heaven, not just anyone can see and touch her.

Okay Pela..

This time I have to choose.

Although it is very heavy, I would rather stay away from the Numbers than be away from my Lord.

I open the green app, read the message from Numbers. And establish yourself to start typing messages..

Rainbow :I'm sorry for the numbers..

Rainbow: I believe God's destiny must be best for me, and for you too.

Rainbow: When your heart has too much hope in someone, then God sends on you a painful hope, so that you know that God is very jealous of the hearts that hope other than Him. Allah prevents you from doing this, so that you may return to His hope.

Rainbow: I also love you Numbers, but true Love means helping each other to reach heaven, not holding hands and walking towards the fire of hell.

Rainbow: For, there are no more beautiful of the two bodies guarding each other, Not meeting each other but waiting, Not passing each other but strengthening each other.

Rainbow: I choose to stay away from you..And love you in silence. For nothing is more sincere than a heart that loves in pain, than praying in silence.

Rainbow: To love in silence, without fear of loss, for God has prepared the best for his patient servant in love.

Rainbow: Someone always loves you in silence, his voice is untouched, but his prayers echo in the sky.

***