SECRET Love High School
No Right Time
After school I intend to go back to the hospital to replace Abas guarding Dimas. However, I was the one who had to take care of Dimas because Dimas' parents left Dimas to me. On the way home I saw Ayu talking together with Rendi but I wonder why Rendi is leading Ayu? since when are they that close? Maybe Ayu's broken, I thought. I quietly approached them wanting to surprise from behind. But it was me who was surprised when I heard their conversation.
“Serious that special song you created for me?” taya Ayu to Rendi
“Iya dear, I have made it for a long time but deliberately want to launch after we officially soan” replied Rendi to Ayu who made me surprised and reflexively exclaimed
“What?”
Ayu who knew I heard their talk langsug closed my mouth with her palm and whispered in my ear telling me to be quiet.
“Diam... silent ssttttt silent!” said Ayu telling me to shut up, I still can't believe what I heard
“You guys dating?” my question was reassuring just in case I misheard, Rendi nodded her head while smiling while Ayu was busy convincing me not to tell anyone first.
“Ka please tomorrow I explain everything, but now you shut up do not tell Aura and Diah,” Ayu looks panicked but I understand and promise to keep a secret.
“Eka, wait!” suddenly there was the sound of Abas from a distance using a Dimas motor sliding from the direction of the station
“That's Abas right Ka? Don't tell him too yeah, later he told Aura” Ayu whispered to me
“Eka, I have bought a three” hour train ticket, Abas said to make me confused, what is the train ticket for? I thought to myself, then Abas said “Bah Dimas died” like being struck by lightning during the day I was stunned and the shadow of Abah floated in my mind.
“Inalillahiwainailaihirajiun,” Ayu and Rendi answered almost simultaneously
“Dimas already know? Where is he now?” I asked Abas
“Dimas has returned home to pick up his father, forced home from the hospital because he wants to attend his Abah's funeral, he advised me to accompany you home,” Abas replied to make me calm.
I thought Dimas was still in the hospital and forced to come home with us on the train.
“Please take me to the boarding house as soon as possible, I have to say goodbye to my mother and sister boarding so that they do not panic looking for me,” I told Abas
-*-*_*-*-
Abas who saw me moody tried to strengthen me by telling me about his father. I just found out if Abas is an orphan, his mother remarried to her father now.
“When Dad left, I felt my life was over, especially when Mom decided to get married again, I was very sad, some days did not want to leave the room,” Abas started the story
“What did you die of?” aska wants to know
“Kidney pain, has long since Dad continues to wash blood, at that time I was first grade Junior High I did not understand anything, I view Mom as a bad woman, I look at you, I hated Mom and I moved here to Om Toni and I became a bad boy, skipped school, obscure talk, until someone told me that death was certain, we will not be able to prevent it, weeping over death and ignoring the living is silliness, and we will be even more sorry after they are gone. You know who gave me that understanding?”
Ask Abas to me who then he answers himself “Dimas!”
Abas looked at me as if saying Dimas would be strong to deal with this then I smiled and Abas continued his words
“Now I understand, Mother is fighting on her own to sustain our lives, in that distress Om Ridwan who is now my Stepfather was present helping my Mother. After Dad no om Ridwan married my mother and sent my sisters to school, I should not hate him even I should thank him for taking care of my family,”
“I know Dimas will be strong, he told you to accompany me home it has been described if he is more worried about me than himself,” I replied with a smile and Abas returned my smile
“That's what makes me give up on you, I feel you guys are better suited together, seem harmonious and fill each other up, but I can't lie to myself,” Abas said to me instantly in shock, I looked at him and waited for his next words
“I like you Ka, I know this is not the right time but wouldn't there never be a right time for this?” ask Abas to me
The train has arrived at my hometown station. The distance between the city and my village can be reached in 15 minutes by train. Arriving at the station we took the angkot for approximately 10 minutes.
I keep watching Abas, I haven't answered his statement. I'm confused what to say. If he had talked like that before the retirement tragedy that time we might have been the happiest couple on earth.
Now the situation is getting more complicated. I just made peace with Dimas after breaking up. Aura obviously liked Abas. I'm not sure if I still like Abas as much as I used to. I mean, I don't deny that I still have feelings for Abas but Alimabbas's signal has recently weakened. Actually not because it didn't ring but because I ignored it. I don't want to fantasize too high. Moreover, Aura had already taken the start to publicize her feelings to Abas. I don't want Dimas to stay away either. It hurts when it comes to being away from Dimas. So I decided to give up.
Knowing my love was reciprocated like this I hesitated over my decision. Can I hope again? Am I being too selfish if I want Abas? Would I be happy if Aura and Dimas were disappointed?
If you think about it now, it feels like a teenager is very wishy-washy and greedy. At first I really liked Abas as if he was just Abas in this world. Then because of a mistake I made with Dimas, at that time I clean hard want to break up but after breaking up I was very sad. Just a few days of making friends suddenly became hesitant when Abas also liked me. I want Abas but also don't want to lose Dimas and I want to remain Aura's best friend.
-*-*_*-*-
