LOVE THE MAFIA: The Second Woman

CSM1: REGRETS

"No matter what your circumstances, I promise to accept you for who you are, Karina."

"Loe's crazy, you know, Le! Do you know who he really is? His family? Her work? her status?"

"Why did you sell this to me?"

"Because you're surnamed Ferdinand. Ha ha! You're the reason they're all dead, Bule!"

One by one their deaths began to appear before him. William's nightgown was already soaked in sweat, while his body convulsed in pain.

"Do you still feel worthy to live in this world, Bule! You're the cause of their deaths!"

You are the cause of their death!

You are the cause of their death!

The stucco youth screamed, waking up in the middle of the night with a head in pain. His stomach churned with nausea. With a weak and limped body he went to the bathroom to remove all of his entrails.

***

If only life could be bought every mistake would be easy to fix, until there is no such thing as regret. And if everyone is willing to think repeatedly in doing an action, maybe the regret will never come to haunt. However, that is the truth of living in this world. Mistakes and regrets have become commonplace to happen.

William Ferdinand never felt that calm again after the mistake that occurred three years ago. For the umpteenth time in the last three years, the handsome young man of Indo-German blood could never fall asleep soundly. He always woke up in the middle of the night with gasping breath and sweat soaking up the body, due to prolonged nightmares. The guilt did not go away even though he repeatedly tried to hold his chest and considered everything as the destiny of the Almighty.

William stood glued to look at a gravestone bearing the name 'Ananta Permana Ridho'. The only friend and closest person he had last had, but also had to leave, making William live a long life. This is the fourth grave he has visited today, after eating his mother, siblings and former co-worker.

William is tired of blaming himself for every incident that has taken their lives. Even so the feeling of guilt that it feels impossible to leave. He cursed his stupidity that is too impulsive in a relationship, until in the end he had to end up losing.

If only time could be turned back, if only he had not hastily and investigated in advance the status of the woman who had made him fall in love, he said, it was possible that right now Anan and Algo were still standing and laughing with him.

"Sorry."

I don't know how many words have raged and want him to spill out of his head. But in fact only one word that managed to say and break the silence.

William placed a flower over Anan's tomb, then gently rubbed the tombstone.

"I promise I'll see you more often" he said with teary eyes. Nothing is more regrettable than the loss of a friend by his own actions.

William stood with a heavy heart turned around and left the tomb which that morning looked very quiet.

Along the way to the funeral, William's memory groped back at the events three years ago. A careless incident due to his overly impulsive decision. Where she falls in love with a woman without knowing her true identity, which ultimately drags her into a catastrophe.

"If I could control myself then, would my life be any different?" he murmured in the heart.

The handsome young man's clear blue eyes looked up at the ceiling, glaring back to the past.

***

🔪Three Years Ago🔪

The glitter of the capital lights adds to the beautiful atmosphere of the city streets of K. The moon's rays illuminate the darkness of the night. A young man of mixed blood was observing a beautiful woman of small stature who was seen walking hastily towards an apartment room where she was. The young man hid behind a wall, peering at the woman who was currently glued to him staring at a pink paper neatly folded and taped to the door of the apartment.

The sweet-eyed woman smiled amusedly. In this sophisticated era, there are still people who want to bother writing on a piece of paper. Half in doubt, the fingers stretched out to take it and open it slowly. My eyes sparkle when reading every series of characters that are arranged so neatly and beautifully. Every now and then she smiled slightly, the radiance of haru taste tucked clear from the look of her eyes.

The poetic words he could guess who the owner was capable of stirring the bottom of his heart. He was closed, between believing and not believing if the words were deliberately strung together for him.

The sundanese woman shook her head slowly, then clucked in annoyance." It's impossible for these words to be strung together for me, isn't it? You're just too naive, Karina," she said.

The corner of William's lips curled at the sentence. With a slow step he walked over, then cleared his throat to her.

"Achelm!"

The Deheman in an instant disperse the daydream of the adorable-eyed woman. He turned around and was stunned when he saw this handsome young man who had been close to him for a year, he was smiling sweetly at him.

Karina looked at him in a slight daze. Not fully believe if the person who has been driving him home for a few days is really standing in front of him. The beautiful character writer who had been thinking about was right in front of his eyes.

"Will, you ...." Karina stopped her speech. He bit his lower lip, staring awkwardly at the tall, strapping young man who was now walking towards him.

The young man who was familiarly called Bule by his hostess friend chuckled at the awkward attitude of the woman who had just read his poem. The actual poem was indeed intentionally stuck there, only to shock the woman who had secretly been his longing.

Karina Larasati's. She was the only woman who managed to enter and disturb the life of a William, so always present in his beautiful dreams and snatched away all the calm he had.

A fairly intense meeting at the restaurant where William worked made the two unconsciously greet each other, pay attention to each other to engage in familiarity and eventually fall into a word called romance.

"Is this what we call true love?" Karina thought.

"That's for you, Karina," William said as if he had understood Karina's mind.

The woman smiled haru. No need to ask back, by reading and living every character that William had written for him, he certainly understood how deep the young man felt towards him.

"But ... why, Will? Why should I?"

She's curious. Of the many women, why did the handsome bule actually choose him?

"The universe that has upheld this taste for you, Karina. Sang Hyang Widhi who guided my heart to you."

There was a drop of dew suddenly present and restrained in both my eyes Karina when she heard William's reply. The words of the assistant chef of one of the famous restaurants of the capital K managed to make his chest beat, as if there were flowers blooming in there.

Tell me that he is greedy right now. Although there is a sense of inappropriate that is often present in Karina, in fact, for the first time she really felt very happy. His eyes could not lie, he showed it all.

William's right. Love can come and go without permission, and comes suddenly without ever being asked. Like this time, like what had happened to him even though he knew it was wrong. Their love comes at an inopportune time.

Unfortunately, William was unaware of all of this.

"I hope all these feelings are reciprocated, Karina. I hope this feeling of longing comes at the right time."

The deg!

An invisible feeling that immediately pinched Karina's heart caught the last words spoken by William.

Again, the young man was right. Their love comes at a less than appropriate time.

However, seeing the young man who suddenly bowed and handed him a flower like a prince, Karina chose to deny her logic.

He wanted it, something that might never come a second time.

"Will, you ...."

"Karina. We're made, yeah."