High School Autobiography

'DINGDONG' HAPPY BIRTHDAY....?

       Wednesday at 04:55 in the morning in the elite housing town of Artana, drizzle and cold air hit a girl who is now 18 years old, but fortunately Eril came in time to his house, so that his clothes were not wet, Eril had been standing in front of the entrance of his house, standing with a heart of indignation, and a soul that was screaming hysterically, facing his bitter body at the house of his parents, how his shoulder stood there, his gun he slipped in the back pocket of his pants, of course covered by the back cloth of his shirt, hope his parents are not surprised by a device that has killed a human.

“Hiks hiks, hiks,”

Eril was still trying to stop the crying as he pleased, he still felt this reality like a nightmare coming true, his feelings were very, very scared, even his whole body shuddered in fear, he said, he rubbed his nose which had slime with the sleeves of his shirt, his eyes were wiped with the arms of his shirt, his hands were completely trembling, the coldness here, not as strong as Eril's remorse, his heart and mind were so troubled, his eyes were reddened to feel the pain of life, but, he hoped his papa mama would listen well to Eril's explanation and complaint, because, Eril only came to say goodbye.

Eril looked at the golden doorknob, he was fantasizing, or perhaps this was actually hope, if only when he opened the door, then all had gathered in his house while saying 'happy birthday' and Fihan's death was just a lie as part of Eril's birthday celebration, his gun was just a toy gun.

So, Eril rang the bell of his house, carrying all the rest of the breath he brought to this house, in the hope that his breath was not wasted.

'DINGDONG'S'

Just one time just ringing the bell, Eril will wait at the door patiently, while preparing his soul to face the second bitter reality, namely the tantrums of his parents. One minute later, the door lock was opened, so Eril took a deep breath with the courage he cultivated to solve everything quickly, then exhaled with the readiness to receive anger from his parents. Suddenly the door opened, a 43-year-old woman, with wavy black hair framing beautifully her oval-shaped face, but her hair was not as long as Eril's, her thick, sexy lips developed a welcome smile, but the thick lips turned flat as the black eyes sparkled like Eril's, looking at Eril who turned her son back home.

“E-Eril?” Surprised Mama Eril with surprise until his forehead frowned.

“Hiks ma-mama..” Ogre Eril who in fact he is not ready to toughen up even can not calm his breath.

However, Eril did not see the anger in his mother, but Eril had run away from home, and woke up the mama's deep sleep.

Mama Eril immediately opened the door wide, he was astonished by the presence of Eril who looked very haggard, but of course Mama Eril was very grateful because the child came home safely.

“Sini enter first,” pinta mama Eril welcome.

Then for some reason, Eril's heart was touched by the soft voice of the mother, with heavy steps, Eril entered into his magnificent house which had been a witness of his childhood, he continued to step into the living room which contained three golden sofas, which surrounded the carpet with pictures of snowflakes, Eril still remembered, when Jihan Junior High had studied with him on the carpet, but memories are still memories. Eril was now sitting on a long sofa leaning against a glass window with red curtains, while the mother closed the door again, because it was still very early in the morning, she also had time to turn on the lights to make it brighter. Mama Eril was still wearing her green bed pajamas with roses.

The drizzling rain was still flushing, and it was getting heavier as time went on, the air was quite cold, and the darkness of the sky was still plastered.

“Why don't you go home Eril?” asked Mama Eril anxiously as she stepped towards the sofa.

Eril lowered his gaze, he was still silent. Then Eril's mother sat on the sofa occupied by Eril right beside her left.

“Eril... You should not need to run away..” said mama with affection.

But again, Eril could not help but hold back his tears when he heard the voice of his mother who was very much missed, he recalled the moments with the mother who was full of attention to Eril.

“You why Eril?” poking mama Eril slightly looked down suspiciously at Eril's haggard face.

“Hiks... mama... what.. mama..... still will... hiks..... match me?” eril asked, filled with sadness.

Mama Eril then grabs Eril's left hand lovingly, then holds her on her thigh.

“A month after you ran away, our neighbor Fihan came here.” said mama Eril opened a secret.

Suddenly Eril was surprised to hear it, but he still acted haggard.

“...he came to marry you,” continued mama Eril seriously.

Clearly Eril was very surprised to know the truth, his eyes were wide open, his eyes looked at the emptiness because his mind was turning back the same life and then with Fihan, he said, trying to remember everything he had done a month ago, why was Fuhan hiding it? Why isn't Fihan talking about it?

His heart and his glassy mind were instantly touched by the truth, until his tears grew louder and his heart grew indignant, how not, what Eril thought that Fihan would never marry her, was, never would love her even until Eril thought her love was just a clap of hands, now, all is disputed, with the fact that Fihan will ask her to marry, Eril is still silent but mentally shaken.

“At first.. mama equally papa want to reject it, because we do want our daughter-in-law to understand about the science of religion, but.. when Fihan explained everything about you guys, we did not know about the science of religion, we started to think that your matchmaking was not good, mom also did not expect, if it turns out that Fihan is a hafiz, even he understands very well about religion, that's where we started to believe in Fihan, from, he also told me about his family first, mama also just found out that Ustaz Alkan's boarding school included a branch of his pesantren mother Fihan, well, from there we are sure...” reveal mama Eril.

“Hennnng... hiks hiks...” Eril came back crying.

How sorry he had killed Fihan, Eril could have fantasized if he had stayed in the store and did not know Fihan had a firearm, surely Eril now remains with Fihan even he could have married him, he said, but, why also did Fihan have to have a gun firearm, for what?

“...so.. mama is equally papa wish you marry him with Fihan, you are right, his son is not the same as his father, Fihan is very similar to his mother, he is a godly child...” add mama.

But, all the truth came too late, the happy news had now turned into news that hurt Eril more and more, and Eril was completely inexhaustible with the problems of life that now befall him, on the one hand regret and on the other side confusion. So Eril lowered his head and grabbed his own hair with great hatred for the reality that befell him, snapping it as if he wanted to pluck all the hair from his head but, it was as hard as avoiding this reality, even she screamed in pain, so much pain for a girl like Eril who saw her heart quirk dead by her own hands right before her eyes.

”AAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHH!“ Eril shouted out loud enough to the point that both his legs were thrashing unable to accept this bitter reality.

Clearly Eril's mother immediately embraced Eril with the affection of a mother.

”Tenang Eril... if you don't want to marry nothing, mom is equally papa just want you to live happily..“ said mama Eril.

”Hnnnnnnggg hiks.“ Eril cried bitterly unable to accept the test of life of this magnitude.

Mama Eril then lowered Eril's hands so that Eril no longer grabbed her hair, because no matter how a real mother, did not want her child to suffer.

”Eril... te..“ greeting mom Eril cut.

Eril has decided what to say.

”...I will go far..“ he continued trying hard.

”Where else do you want to go..?“ ask Mama Eril who actually does not want to see her son leave.

”Listen first mama!“ sergeant Eril was serious because this conversation was about the self-esteem of his family.

Mama Eril was stunned with shock, he just saw Eril look different like this, so he was silent to hear carefully.

”Hiks... hiks,“

”Mama... I don't want my mom to cry and lament my actions, mama... assume... I was never born, hix... strong-strong mom accepted it. I also apologize if I have not been a good child.“ said Eril with sadness and sadness.

Mama Eril looked at Eril's trembling hands, thinking that Eril might be cold, but, her motherly soul had now said otherwise, that her son had faced a calamity that shook his soul. Even now Eril's mother had been completely aware that Eril's cry and Eril's red eyes were not due to her match, but rather a matter that only Eril could understand.

”...and if I never go home. mama don't look for me yes, let me bear it..“ he added.

”What exactly is Eril? You why Eril?“ search mama Eril with worry.

”I will grow up mama... I will be a respectable woman,“ replied Eril was still downcast trying to convince her that everything would be fine when not.

”Eril...“ said mama Eril with a soft voice trying to make Eril calm.

Then Eril stood up while facing the mother, Eril did not want to tarnish the good name of his family, he did not want to bother his parents, he would face the problem alone, he would face his problems alone, but suddenly a voice called out to Eril, a familiar voice in Eril's ear.

”Eril,“

Just to the right of Eril within three meters, a 45-year-old man, a thin-bodied man with round brown eyes and creamy hair in the style of a soldier, was, papa Eril stood full of questions, still wearing her green pajamas patterned in clouds. The father looked at Eril from head to toe and because of the awkwardness, he hurriedly approached Eril.

”You why Eril?“ whip papa Eril while holding Eril's right shoulder stared fixedly at Eril's haggard face.

”Hiks... hiks..“ Eril bowed sadly with disheveled hair and tears still flowing.

”Eril, does Fihan do anything?“ think papa Eril.

”Hiks hiks hiks, no papa, Fihan a good boy... he.. always help me...“ said Eril senguk-cuckle.

”Terus you why...? Kayak...“ papa Eril's speech hangs while guessing to look at his beloved child.

But, Eril immediately turned away, without a word, without a smile. Free and only free if he talks about the truth now, his sense of compassion for his family has sprinkled his soul to keep his problems alone.

”Eril where are you going?“ ask Papa Eril loudly suspiciously.

”Hennnngg hiks.. hiks...“ Eril continued to step while biting to hold back the feeling of reality.

He had to leave his family, leave all his memories and togetherness with his family, so he hoped that his family would consider all this meaningless, he hoped that the presence for the last time would be the impression that Eril was still alive and well, although painful, but, this was the best way to maintain the peace of his parents. His eardrum was constantly faced with the sound of papa and his mother calling, making every step Eril took even more agonizing.

”Eril! Erill! Where are you going?“

Now that Eril had opened the door of his house, he was faced with a torrential rain with air as cold as his tears, looking at the dark sky, which might be as dark as his future, he would face this reality alone.

”Hennnnng hix, hix,“ cries Eril sobbing.

”Eril out in the rain, do not go first..“ said mama Eril with worry who stepped over to Eril.

Eril turned to his mother, only wanting to see her face one last time, then he turned his face out of the house, like facing death, and Eril ran away from his house, running to keep his mom feeling, because it would be more painful if his mom saw the killer Fihan is their own child.

”Eril! Erill! Eril!“ yelled at my mother with worry.

But Eril continued to run towards the gate of his house, then left his family.

His intention to tell his carelessness to his papa mama has been lost, he feels pity and is afraid to express it, so, he let time answer him, after all, he has seen his parents, he has seen his parents, so that letting them stay so was the right thing, lonely and his fear he would swallow himself, he did not expect his parents could forgive the carelessness of their son, now, Eril only hoped, he had no hope, that his family could take the stamp of a murderer who had been imprinted on his only daughter.

No one will understand his feelings! There was no way his family could accept a murderer like Eril, he just did not want to trouble his parents, and all the truth about Fihan that his mother conveyed was only an inner suffering for him, in fact, this moment also the hatred for himself began to flow in him, Eril hated never expressing his feelings for Fihan, he hated never being able to understand the character of Fihan, he hated never being able to understand the character of Fihan, he hated never being able to be patient and waited for Fihan to declare directly.

In the rain, Eril ran with sobs of regret.

”Hennng... hiks hiks...“.