Fear Aida

Eight Years ago (2)

Days have changed since I first met Celline who was my two hundredth patient at the end of this year, that morning I just arrived at the office and saw Rachel was waiting for me in the lobby of the building not as usual where she was always waiting for me in the workspace. I ignored this new habit as I continued to walk into my room, as did Rachel who walked after me to my study.

"Yesterday I was in charge of guarding Celline and I think she was worse than you might have thought" Rachel said to me as she continued to follow me along.

"What's wrong?" just short

"I think he has a multiple personality, for the first diagnosis I could mention he had Bipolar. Maybe your approach can be changed for this patient, Dr. Lee" Rachel tried to explain her diagnosis to me and gave me advice

"Bipolar? no problem, what's the difference?" ask me calmly

I with a high success rate and also proven successful in dealing with hundreds of patients feel that what Rachel said was not a problem, my analysis of Celline will not change and it is very appropriate for me. It was impossible for a doctor Lee to make a mistake and miss even a small thing.

"If your patient is bipolar, you have to make sure you don't log his data when he's in the maniac phase, Doctor Lee" Doctor Mark interrupted my conversation with Rachel, I happened to pass by his study and accidentally met him while I was on my way to my room.

"Doctor Mark" I said, greeting him, I was upset that he eavesdropped on my conversation with Rachel about my patient.

"Your eyes will be different if you do not know the schedule of the ups and downs of the seminal phase, I just remind you that you are not too big to put the patient's health forward" doctor Mark said, It sounds like insinuation to me, I know my colleagues are not happy with all my success.

"I know I'll take your advice into consideration" I ignored him and immediately walked back into my office with Rachel still following me

In that room I immediately reread the files related to Celline's, but I did not get any data that Celline had bipolar disorder or any other mental disorder that Rachel said she had. All of Celline's data was just a trauma she had expected from her accident, "Did Rachel also want me to fail for the second hundredth time?" my question is in my heart. While I was focusing on the data search, it was possible that Rachel understood what I was looking for and flipped through the file.

"Sometimes such paper data isn't always true Doctor Lee... The experience on the field is more accurate in my opinion." chirps Rachel said a little stammered.

"I've always worked this way and what success 198 times have you doubted? right now until before the end of the year I just have to finish two kids" in a snobbish tone I said that

"I've looked after him since yesterday, he sometimes laughs loudly and sometimes cries loudly in a short time. Not to mention that he often takes a lot of food and sometimes he does not even eat at all" Rachel said as she approached me and covered the file I read with her hand

"Please consider someone else's input this time, I know Doctor Mark was a bit offensive to you but that's the truth" Rachel said in a worried-sounding tone, I was silent for a moment while looking into Rachel's eyes.

For the first time in cooperation Rachel had a separate assessment for the patient we handled both, at that time Rachel seemed to be trying hard to convince me if the analysis was correct against Celline, she said, but Dr. Lee is still an arrogant and haughty doctor that makes him ignore what Rachel says.

"She just wanted to see me fail, there's not a single piece of data that says Bipolar Celline" I chimed in and I closed the file and walked away from Rachel to get out of Celline's room, but Rachel was still following me until we got to Celline's room.

In Celline's room I saw her standing staring at her window and looking out, I gently banged on the door to catch her attention and greeted Celline.

"For the Celline, how was your day?" tanyaku while giving a hand gesture to ask for permission to enter his room, the voice managed to provoke his attention and he immediately turned to look at me with a smile.

"For Doctor Lee. I'm happy here, please come in" Celline replied sounding friendly and giving me permission to enter, then the three of us sat down on a chair with a table in Celline's room. Rachel and I were sitting opposite each other, and Celline was sitting in front of us.

That morning Celline's attitude was still the same and there was nothing different, it strengthened me if indeed Celline did not have bipolar disorder in her. Rachel's assumption instantly became more meaningless to me, and I was so eager to check on my patient. He will be the second hundredth determinant of the success of a doctor Lee.

"I want to check on you because Doctor Rachel says you cry hard sometimes and laugh suddenly, is that right? want to tell me something?" ask me gently

"Oooh that's right.hihi sometimes I think of my bitter memories, sorry Doctor Rachel if it freaks you out" Celline replied sounding friendly, his small laughter also accompanied every sentence he said.

"I'm not afraid, but your situation seems to be worse than Doctor Lee expected" Rachel's chimpanzee pressed down a bit and sounded serious

"Oooh yeah? what kind of one?" her tan and Celline's tone of voice seemed curious about Rachel's statement

"May.." replied Celline, smiling at Rachel.

"Do you remember what happened to you back then?" rachel asked him, he asked a very sensitive question asked of the patient and it was not justified in a medical examination like this.

I was angry with her, I turned to look at Rachel who was sitting next to me and said...

"Brachel! what are you doing?!" I asked to snap at him

"Sorry Doctor Lee, but I have to do this. I don't want you to mishandle the patient" Rachel replied with a snapshot

"It's okay Doctor Lee, fine... It was during the day when I came home from school that I saw my father beating my mother drunk. Back then I was trying to protect my mom.." Celline hadn't finished talking I stopped her.

"Quite Celline, that's not how we work here" I chimed in with a voice that might have sounded emotional at the time because of Rachel's actions

"Continue, we need to know that you're really not okay" Rachel said, forcing Celline to continue the heartbreaking story

"Then my father pulled my school shirt at that time violently to make it torn in the front button, then pulled my school shirt, I don't know what my father was thinking but it seems that at that time I became a meal that can be enjoyed by adult men..." Celline continued her story

I stood up from my seat and pulled Rachel out of the room, but Rachel tried so hard to hold me back to keep us in Celline's room.

"Forward Celline! get your emotions out!!" rachel shouted at that moment while holding back the pull of my hand

"My father raped me at the time, although my mother helped me to keep the rape from happening but my father's power was too strong even for us to fight both. At that time Mom even threatened to stab the kitchen knife she took before, but my father shook his head and he just kept raping me with a knife..." Celline was still casually recounting the bad events that had happened to her, to be honest back then I had a bit of goosebumps. How not, this girl recounted her bitter experience with a very calm and well-ordered language.

"My mother attacked my father with the knife, but he took the knife and stabbed it into my mother's stomach until she died. My mother's blood hit my face when I pulled the knife from my mother's stomach, you know what my father did? he continued to rape me with a brand" Celline kept telling me the incident calmly and in great detail, the look on his eyes was like a no-brainer and he was like he was not in any pain.

It was strange for such a heavy case that someone was still relaxed and calm, I was quite goosebumps but still believed my intuition was not wrong towards Celline.

"Celline, Enough!" at that moment, I was out of words.

"Then I was content to rape me and put all that liquid in my stomach, I was already very weak and shocked. My body shook violently and made me do nothing but lie on the floor of my living room, at that time, my father dragged me and my mother's body stiffened into our car and took us to an unused dock and drowned my mother's body by giving ballast to the second his feet and drowned him there, I tried to run but I had no more energy until I was caught again by my father" Celline still calmly continued to tell the unfortunate incident. With the same tone of voice and eye, Celline seemed to not want me and Rachel to give him a pause to retell what had happened to him. Of course it makes me anxious if the state of Celline suddenly worsened because of the trauma he experienced.

"Does he look normal to you, Doctor Lee?" rachel asked while looking at me with a frightened face

"Then I saw someone from a flashlight approaching our place, Dad panicked and left me there. The stranger realized my existence, at that time I felt there was a hope for me to be helped but I was wrong because I had a bad incident again, that person raped me too" celline said then took a deep breath and exhaled.

"Then here I was when one morning someone found me without a thread stuck in my body" said Celline again still looks relaxed

"I don't know what to say..." Rachel said that with a look full of fear looking at Celline.

So calm Celline told me all the events she had experienced for me and Rachel, my only patient with a different attitude. In my heart full of anxiety about it, Rachel's words made me rethink the way to deal with Celline, but I doubt because all this time I've always succeeded with the data I have, the data I have, I always use every patient's data as a benchmark for their recovery and the Celline chart is improving quite well for severe cases.

And about Rachel, to be honest I was disappointed and angry with her. He underestimated me and just like his fellow doctors when he knew my success rate was perfect because I never failed in dealing with my patients. That day was the last day I worked with Rachel, I chose to handle Celline myself and it made my relationship with Rachel tenuous

The day I spent well with Celline, she showed a good improvement. I remember when he mixed in with the doctors and nurses there, he also managed to blend in with the patients in the witness and victim shelters. Every now and then, Celline and I make handcrafts out of folding paper to form origami, paint, and play othello together. At that time I felt that the last incident with Rachel when facing Celline was really a wrong assessment because I handled Celline alone for several months she showed tremendous improvement.