Emotion Taster

Arc 3 Sweet Stung Acid Ant Format: Chapter 10 - Suicide Pain

The day is over. The three of us went home together on Sunday morning. After knowing the purpose of the intruder and how to meet him, of course the reconnaissance mission will be easier.

The hospital in my city there is only one of the largest, the rest are only small clinics where they will not treat patients with special treatment such as stroke, cancer, let alone AIDS. So, if the intruder is after the victim with a history of severe disease in this city, only there can he find it.

The clock showed me at nine when I actually got to the area around the school. So, it was time for Amalia and Pero to part ways.

From school I walked quite a distance which was comparable to my departure to school. It was a much harder test for me to endure. When I got home, no one welcomed me. Coming from the back door, I also saw no signs of life.

Hmmm .. maybe there is no one at home.

I opened the lock, started to enter lazily like a tormented person while displacing my bag on the floor. The heavy weight makes me want to rest immediately. But, at the same time my stomach started shaking asking for food.

From the back door, I was sure to pass through the kitchen and dining room, walking to the place hoping that something was left there. But ....

“...”

Yes, empty.

There is no food in a place where there are no inhabitants. Maybe Diona's sister who left also thought I'd eat out.

Sometimes I get upset myself, my family gradually starts to get out of reach. The father of the head of the family got a lot of mutations so it was difficult for him to go home, the mother was still pursuing her job which was very random working hours, and sister Dina who began to get her own association outside.

*****

The next day, I started school again. Start a normal boring life again. Monday this time is more troublesome and lazy to welcome, it's all because of weekend holidays that I do not use well to rest. The Pero event went a long way and the hotel stay made me tired, especially when the experience of pain similar to death was felt again. It felt like my trauma to Amalia was reopened.

I went down the stairs, left and wished there was food downstairs.

“...”

But ..., it remains empty.

I know, I usually also take over homework when no one is holding it. Brother Dina knows that, she is also getting used to not worrying about me when going long. I can look at the stomach. But, somehow for now all of these things feel troublesome.

Alright ... for once it might be okay to buy a meal outside.

Sister Dina for some reason was not home even until the morning now. Either because of following in my footsteps who went to stay the night, he is also doing the same now. The old man here began to disappear, the house became quieter and turned into a temporary resting place.

My sister who did not come home was actually asked before, spending her own time was very disturbing in another sense. Although I did not do anything with sister Dina at home, but her existence has become my routine. I don't know, compared to parents, losing sister Dina at home is much more uncomfortable.

I left the house, walked to school, but stopped by the porridge vendor as a menu choice this morning.

If chosen why, maybe because he just happened to appear in my sight at the right time. There is no good reason as the seller looks great, looks clean, food warrants, or a friendly price. The seller is only a regular user of the cart who lives in one strategic place.

I ordered one serving, and sat down where it had been provided. The seller there had prepared a set of long chairs with his desk. Customers will eat at the same table.

Hmn .. it feels quite foreign.

My family only has Dina's sister really close. Quite rarely do I eat out alone because there is my brother who used to accompany me. If you don't eat at home, then eat out together. If one has eaten, usually one has prepared a meal at home.

Hn?

As I waited, I saw one little boy eating at the side. He's a man whose feet don't even reach the ground. The child's leg strands are dangling back and forth alternately, like a spoiled child.

However, something that made me distracted was what he was eating.

The menu here is only porridge, there are no other options that make things strange. So, something strange in my vision is that the porridge has so many taoge topics.

I didn't know porridge could be enjoyed like that. But, when I was a kid, I didn't like vegetables, and I got into them. Seeing young children who eat such abundant vegetables is more effective like herbivorous animals.

“...”

“Hn?”

Our eyes met, probably because he felt my gaze towards the porridge full of taoge that he was eating. As a result, the hand motion that was scooping the porridge stopped, the focus was diverted to me.

“You want to too? Taoge?” the boy said while looking at me.

Ye?

I'm not sure that's the right word. To a little boy, he was rude to call me that call. The little boy I used to meet always called an old honorific like ‘kakak’.

But .. hmn .. maybe I was the one who thought too much about it. Not that it is entirely rude, just that the thought of my culture is so.

“Neg, thanks. The kayak porridge is not suitable for being given taoge.”

Especially with a large amount to cover the surface of the slurry itself.

“Oh, you think so?” ask the child. “For me, the main food is taoge, and the porridge is complementary so that the taoge is not tasteless.”

“Heh?” response raised next to the eyebrows. “Stop, I think it's just you who made that position.”

“...”

“...”

I fell silent, the boy also started to move his hands to continue eating.

From the beginning there was no intention of getting close to the little boy, at the same time, my order porridge came as well. So, we also did not continue the conversation any deeper.

The time left before school is actually quite a lot. But, it feels uncomfortable to eat for long in that place. Porridge is very easy to swallow, there are no obstacles at all to put all of it into the esophagus.

I don't know exactly, but the food probably ran out in the three minutes I started.

I reached for the money in my pocket, and I saw a little boy next to me. He also turned out to have spent eating taoge mixed with his porridge. It's just that unlike me who packs things ready to go, the child prefers to stay quiet longer.

“Finally done too,” said the child.

“Hn?”

I who stood up wanted to leave the place was restrained. The money that should have been raped was stuck in the wallet, he again took my attention.

“You ... huft .. hah .. yes, you ... have you had something lately?”

“...”

Facing a child who talks to me like parallel turns out to be quite emotional. The sound of a child passing in my ear. But, when heard it turns out to call him with the word ‘kamu’, there is no respect. The direction of the voice I traced, and found a small body like a normal child, this increasingly spilled emotions to scold him taught respect.

Ah .. Now I know why parents emit waves of negative emotions when they see children who behave a lot in a bad sense. They were apparently expecting something like respect and tranquility.

But, well .. this little boy also has not a wave of evil emotions like wanting to punish. He was purely acting out of assuming his actions were normal. So ....

“What does it mean?”

Aku menanggapi pertanyaan tersebut senormal mungkin.

“The question is easy, you should just answer the first incident that appeared in your head. If that's not enough, you may need to consider something that most affects how you feel right now.”

“...”

In front of me was very sure there was a small child who was no more than 130 inches tall. His voice was as high as those of the little ones who asked for spoiled ice cream in the middle of the road. But .... However, what he said was too adult for a child his age. This keeps my heart feeling mixed up.

I wanted to ignore it, but I felt like I was going to lose to a child.

“That question remains unanswered. There are many events that appear in my head, too much until not enough time if I clear one-on-one,” I replied to him.

Actually I can answer that. Something that disturbed my mind more was the condition of the house that was getting quieter with the departure of sister Dina. But, in this condition the topic does not want to domedas.

“Hmn ... so you're the type of person who can withstand all those feelings.”

A feeling?

Back to hearing the word foreign. The little boy spoke like he knew everything about me. Though, I'm sure this is the first time I've seen his face.

“Iya, everything I can hold, everything just needs habituation,” reply me while trying to escape from the place.

My hands began to maneuver, my footwork accelerated to move towards the seller, a short conversation, wanting to pay the porridge menu debt, and immediately went away.

If seen, he should be in elementary or middle school age. Even though he was not wearing a uniform, it was natural that he knew about the existence and appearance of my clothes, the position as a student who could not accompany him continued here.

The main business is done, I was a little bit apart by nodding and thanking.

“...”

“...”

Our gaze had met because I was curious and averted my eyes for a moment. But I didn't say anything to the little boy.

My steps have moved back, the distance between me and the porridge sales area has begun to form.

“Woi ...”

“...”

But, the boy specifically called out to me. His voice boomed to the ear, it could be felt that if the source was a little different from his seat at the beginning, the child walked forward specifically to chase after me.

“What else?” my many.

I reflexively could not resist it, so my body responded silently and turned to look at him.

“About the load you bear .. if at any time it feels too heavy, you can give up anytime.”

The words I can't take their meaning. But ....

“Iya, maybe when it's time ..”

For the third time I answered randomly so that the communication quickly ended.

I don't know.. Lately I've met a lot of weirdos. Although not all bad, but a variety of traits in which many of them give difficulty to respond.

Especially this time ... a child with a disrespectful sentence.

****

My stomach is full, my stamina is also filled enough to be able to face the morning ceremony. Of course as always, what torments me is not the ceremony, but a condition in which many people come together on the ground produces many waves of emotion. Their fatigue will be felt one by one as time goes on. It was a torture in the beginning, although in the end my emotional wave detection senses would get used to it.

*Whoush ....

Ah ... yes, like that— Hn?

Wave ... emotion?

A bitter-bitter cold with a floating sensation, felt blocking every time I approached the school. Very big and thick .. because I am still quite far from school.

I sped up the road, put a little energy in my legs and held back all those emotional waves. There was one turn before arriving at the main gate, not too far away. Then, just as I turned, I saw my school crowded by many people.

What's the matter?

Not only students and teachers, but also many foreign communities and police stood around the main door. From here it appears that some police are trying to enter, but detained by the teachers concerned, then ridiculous events that attract the attention of the curious surrounding community.

This was no ordinary occurrence, the convoys were too crowded in numbers to simply permit a special event. This wave of emotions .. is more towards something emergency.

I wanted to get closer, cut the distance and get confused with those who were stuck couldn't go deeper into school. One or two questions I heard beside the curious student. But, no one could answer him, they were also both newly arrived and happened to be stuck together.

Hn?

But, I saw one person .. one person who seemed to have a slightly different attitude. He did not look confused, his emotional wave was different from the others, it felt more towards fear. Then, if there was one person who could change the sense of the emotional waves in the middle of the sea of humans, only he would appear in my head.

“Amalia ..”

“...”

The girl was in a state of chaos, her actions were forcing open her own path in the crowd. But, he could not, his strength and size were inferior to the human wall there.

“What's in school? Why are you in such a hurry? What are you looking— Hn?“

Amalia did not notice me as she spoke, her gaze immediately turned down, she groaned and took her own notes. I initially did not mind in the panic state of many people around, but my sentence came to a halt as the girl pointed out the note firmly.

Kaivan .. there is bad news. So, you have to be ready before.

Bad news?

“Do not worry. If you are calm, I am also calm,” I said casually.

Either he doesn't learn or he doesn't. My own emotions were more stable, whatever torment was slashed, the more painful the waves of emotions entangled directly within me.

Inside the school .. there are many more. The case is rather heavy ...

Azarin ... same mother .. died of suicide.

“...”

But, the news is quite piercing. Not because of the wave of emotions, this is exactly pure pain coming from me. Daphamine and serotonin levels plummeted, my chest felt squeezed, shocked by something out of my shadow.

I was not close to the student, only briefly meeting where he cursed and hit me. His delinquency ..and his bullying actions, there is still no behavior that makes memories beautiful. But, to receive the news of death, it still hurts.

I appreciate it, not the slightest thought of him to disappear from the world. I understand his suffering, I can feel his resentment and anger. For a moment it felt like my emotions with him were connected.

So ....

It hurts.