DOLEFULNESS

Karina Ayunda Shahira

...HAPPY READING'S...

...----------------...

"Yuk ah shin cepetan, already laper nih"Wata via whining when the break bell has rung.

"Yes, yes" I answered and stood up, as usual, holding my arm like someone would cross it.

"I'm coming with you guys to the cafeteria" said Alfredo with a smile, me and through a look at each other.

"Yes ayuk" I said with a smile I forced.

The atmosphere of the canteen is not too crowded, I, via and Alfredo ordered batagor and orange ice. My eyes were watching around hoping to find someone I was looking for, maybe not yet to her canteen, my inner self.

"Liatin what the hell is shin" said Alfredo who made me immediately look at him in shock.

"Not really do, continue eating" I said.

"we were yesterday in the same room as Rama?" ask via with a seductive tone.

"Yes vi" I said with a shy smile.

"Be careful shin" said Alfredo who made me frown.

"Emang why?" Ask in wonder.

"Oh, Rama is the same karina as dating" said Alfredo, inexplicably there was a sense of disappointment in my heart when Alfredo said that Rama was dating karina.

"Whose karina?" my many.

"Karina Ayunda Syahira, a second sociology class as well" said Alfredo.

"Ah jan ngaco you do, who do you say you are?" tanya.

"Well karina temen les me, yes she said to me herself, and then yesterday she also asked about shinta" said Alfredo, I tried to smile.

"Trus is related to me what? after all I'm the same Rama also not dating" I answered hard-ass, I see Alfredo smiling.

"Yes not that shin, I just want to tell you, fear later karina and her friends do not admit the same thing you"

I was silent for a moment.

"Yes do thank you" I said with a smile even though I had to.

"Vi, do you guys go to class first yes, I want to go to the bathroom first" I said to the two of them when we had finished eating, via and Alfredo nodded his head in agreement.

I went to the bathroom to justify my uniform that was a little messy and also to calm myself, I did not want to look panicked or disappointed in front via or affredo.

"Fuck you" I rattled in my heart, for some reason I wanted so mad at myself.

"You're the one called shinta? " i turned to the source of the voice, I saw there were three girls who were like bad boys, one of them did look a little sweet and pretty but looked very judes on his face.

"Yes why?" I ask, they smile cynically.

"Know me because of his girlfriend Rama" he said with a cynical smile, it looks very evil, oh so this is the name of karina Ayunda Syahira, my mind.

"pake nanya again, you want to grab Rama from me yes" he said with a little raise his voice.

"No" answered.

"Where is the badger ngaku.Basasar chick*** cheap" he said with a mocking laugh.

"What do you mean?" this time I asked with a tone of voice that I raised. I can't accept that he called me that, because I'm not what he said I was.

"I mean? you think yesterday I didn't know that you were driven home with Rama huh? you think I don't know last Sunday night you went for a walk with Rama? I know everything!" he said he yelled at me, I fell silent, I tried to stay calm.

"Why can't Diem answer"?

" I'm sorry I'm going back to class" I said, leaving Karina behind, but she pulled my arm violently.

"I'm not finished yet. If I see you again as Rama looks out for you, I will hurt you shinta" he said threatening me, but I don't care, I take off his hand and go to class.

I sat down at my desk and buried my face in the bag, I suddenly cried, I felt hurt because karina called me **** and cheap girl, I felt lied to, I felt, I feel disappointed with Rama, why hasn't he told me that he has a girlfriend and why has he approached me and told all his friends that I'm his future girlfriend?was I too baper with Rama's attention all this time? my mind is so fucked up, I'm disappointed in Rama and I hate karina. I don't want to see them again!.

"Shin you why?" panicked, I did not answer and I did not dare to lift my face, I was afraid to know that I was crying. I try to calm down, I try to stop crying, I hate to have to cry like this.

"Shin" via calling me again still in an anxious tone, I took a deep breath trying to remain calm and then raised my face.

"Father kok vi" I said with a smile that I forced, but I strenuously held back my tears finally fell again, I hugged via, via returning my arms.

"When I met in the bathroom the same thing as karina vi, she hit me, she told me to make it as far as Rama, she said, I do not accept it because all this time it was not me who approached Rama but Rama who tried to get close to me" I said, via silent for a moment and then took off his embrace.

"Udah ya Shin you do not cry, emang karina his person kayak that, but yes Shin like emang Rama is not dating the same karina, karina aja ngaku, but yes Shin like rama, because if there is anything with Rama Mamad must be the same story me" said via, I just keep quiet, I no longer care about Rama.

"No, don't cry anymore, and I follow the cry" said via, I smiled to make my friend happy.

"That dong smile is beautiful" said via trying to cheer me up.

"But I'm so hurt vi, she said I was**** and a cheap chick"

"Did he know you were? wait here let me hit him" said via in a high tone and then stood up from his chair, I pulled my hand via dang telling him to sit again.

"Udah vi is not papa, the important thing is I am not like what he said" said I tried to win via, via taking a deep breath.

"But Shin I accept he says you are like that" I see his face reddened with anger.

"Udah ya no papa, smile first dong, ugly know that such a manyun" via laughing, me too.

"If you get hit again because you say the same to me yes, I'll be hit by him" I smiled at my friend's behavior, he was very good to me when we knew him not long ago.

"Thank you vi, you are good to me" I said with a sincere smile at him.

"This is Shin's use of friends, it's hard to be happy to be borne together"

Dear God, thank you when I was not happy there was a friend who was very considerate and kind to me, I am grateful to have a friend like via who was ready to comfort me when I was sad like this.

Thank you also to Karina Ayunda Syahira for your harsh words earlier. Thank you very much!. And also for Rama please don't come near me again, I don't want to see your face anymore, even say your name I don't want to anymore.