WHEN IS THIS SUFFERING

part 12's

"Ta, "that voice I heard again. I opened my closed eyes slowly, yes the one standing next to the bed was Arsen.

"What's up" I said while sitting on the bed, my head was dizzy. I saw the clock I was wearing, God, it's still four in the afternoon why I woke up.

Mas Arsen sat on the edge of the bed beside me, "Where is Anindira? " i heard the answer was just asking his son, oh not only did he throw that question at me, he built me up, it was not very useful.

"Brought to play with mom, why? " anything is lazy.

"It's okay" he said.

I just kept quiet, actually lately I've been lazy to talk to Arsen. Because he was upset with her, because last time he asked me for money, even though he knew he had no money to give me.

"Ta why are you? " he asked me but I did not respond, I lay right again my body, I want to continue my sleep. I don't know what the cause is, the sleepiness has gone from my eyes. I stood up to get out of the room. But my hand was held by Arsen.

"You can't appreciate me anymore Ta" he said. I stopped and sat back on the edge of the bed.

"I appreciate how else a mas" ketus me. He looked into my eyes without any expression.

"Mas! My content is getting bigger soon I will be born, are you still like this? The reason you keep looking for work but mas sitting where the caskrongan gambling mas! " difficult me again, yes indeed my content almost entered seven months.

"You've always been a uzonist to me Ta" he replied

"It's not really that, you said I didn't know a few weeks ago you were working. However, not as much as I receive money from you, even you are asking for money from me, I know it mas but I am silent because I do not want to make a fuss. one more mas! the money that you make is the same as the wife's children from Ijal" said Ijal, who is the owner of the gambling shop. But he was not in the house that there was only his wife, I once got the information from my cousin's brothers, if mas Arsen to the stall, then, spend his money not only by gambling but share it for the children of Ijal. Surprised me, whether loving what a gat*l woman makes is the same as my husband.

"See your words Ta!" mas Arsenic. I've gotten used to this.

"You take care of it again! It is so, loving what the women give jal*ng to you mas! "

"What are you talking about, Anita, you say that!"

"Why is it hurt? Every time I say that woman in a rude word, I'm mad at me" I sniffed

"So your word Anita! "

I just sat in pain. The physical pain of the inner pain is all that I feel, for this I am lazy to argue with him. But he just took a storm.

I went to leave her, just leave her alone in the room.

I left later, I looked at the darkening sky, my mind began to sway in regret. Why didn't I accept Adit's mas from the beginning? Why didn't I hear Arya's own sister's words? If my marriage to Mas Arsen hadn't happened maybe I wouldn't have been this sick. Oh my God, I don't know what karma is.

Mas, why are you tormenting this inner and physical? Why didn't you let me go? When I hurt you repeatedly. Surprisingly I can forgive you that easily. You promised to change but, why is it worse? Nothing's changed, not even you're getting here getting rough on me.

Tears back Ietesi, indeed the words of people love and bego is almost the same.

Now that the sky had looked so dark, Azan magrib could be heard in my sight. I stepped in, I reached for the room, one step further my feet would enter the room. However, I still do.

"Ta" said the father, it turns out that the father has come home from work.

"What yeah" I said

"Where else? " say

"From the back, I'll come here first" I said. Actually I know I'm not okay.

When I entered the room, Anindira seemed to have fallen asleep. But I didn't show you the assholes of Arsen. Maybe he went out, usually so.

...****************...

The night was so long I passed, now in the morning I have finished bathing and bathing Anindira. I took a small bag over the closet and put Anindira's shirt inside. After asking permission to mother, I left tampa ask permission to the husband, indeed last night mas Arsen did not come home, yes I think I went to the house of aunt Neni because I avoided it.