Colour

Chapters 15. Becoming Your Lighthouse

Aza's trembling body tells Dikta that the girl is crying, the side Dikta first saw in knowing Aza. Usually despite crying, the girl still yells angrily while hitting people or slamming things. It turned out that while crying as if helpless like this, Aza looked very heart-wrenching.

Dikta aligned their faces, the girl's pale face looked flushed, especially in the eyes and nose. His eyes were a little swollen.

"I'm tired... Can't I go to a place where I'm only there? There is only peace, peace, peace,... I also want to feel it ...." With a sharp breath Aza said.

"I have also tried to let go, to accept, to forget all that hurts. But can't be...." His voice was mixed with his sobs.

"It feels better I wasn't born, if only to be blamed for a mistake I didn't know myself..." His sobs became more and more, Dikta could only pat the girl's shoulder slowly. Letting the girl get all her emotions out, which maybe only she could suppress herself all this time.

"They beat, they cursed, they threw me like an animal... After the truth was revealed, they asked me to be fine. Even I can't interact well with society, kids my age. I dare not defend myself when other students bully me for hating the quiet me..... " His breath sounds heavy, his chest must be tight. There Dikta was shocked, no one had told him this before. Neither Jacob nor Hendri, meaning this girl is still under pressure from her environment without being known by anyone.

Dikta hugged her, trying to reduce the girl's fear and sadness.

"Every day I feel afraid, even to end my life I am not strong. I just don't want to disappoint the people who fought for me like this, but I don't know my purpose. My days are too monochrome, until I forget that gray is also a color." Slowly, his voice had weakened, probably from exhaustion.

"Shhh... Tired yet?" Dikta asked, Aza just nodded with a weak look. There are still tears hanging in her eyes. Dikta rubbed those two eyes with his thumb.

"We continue tomorrow. You're tired, it's night too. Tomorrow we'll find a solution." Aza nodded, then closed her body to Dikta. Which of course makes the man cranky. However, he still welcomed by hugging Aza and stroking the girl's back.

"A good sleep, yeah..." Whisper Dikta, because it feels dizzy and tired Aza can fall asleep quickly.

Dikta called Aza quietly to make sure the girl was already asleep. Now that it was early morning, he did not have time to cook because Aza did not allow him to leave at all. Ordering food online is her last resort, lucky Esa her best friend has a diner.

Until he does not have to worry about his security, because he can trust his best friend. That way Aza can eat and take the medicine.

***

In the morning Dikta felt very sleepy, last night he spoke to Jacob via video phone. Talk about what actions should be taken.

Jacob suggests to do Hypnotherapy, only Jacob said that Aza always fails in the process of hypnotic induction. And because at that time Aza who was quite stubborn so reluctant to do the method.

At that time the girl's anger was still overflowing against her family. Even Aza did deliberately do it so that her family could not get close to her and live in guilt. So that when he saw it the Kusuma family remembered the sins that had been committed to the girl.

But at this time, Dikta hopes Aza is ready. Otherwise, he would have tried to give Aza another calm.

"Mas," Aza's soft voice rang out in half of her consciousness.

"You're not going to college?" Ask Aza again.

"Eerghhhhhhhh..." Erang Dikta, his head is dizzy. Just fell asleep.

"Are you better?" Ask Dikta kebali.

"You sick?" Even Aza asked again, Dikta just shook her head.

"Better continue your sleep, to restore energy." Aza said then turned out of the room.

Dikta put his arm over his forehead, Aza was right he needed to sleep. Pick up his cell phone, and call Tedjo. Ask him to take care of his licensing in the first class at 9 am. He plans to take the next class only, at 2 p.m.

After 30 minutes passed, a small step approached. Aza came with breakfast, a glass of water and a bowl of homemade garlic soup. Rarely cooking does not mean it can not, right? He tried several times to look at his cell phone for guidance.

Before delivering to Dikta he had also made sure if his cooking was perfect enough for someone who rarely touched the kitchen. It is a shame to not be able to cook, there are many apps that provide cooking guides and recipes.

Staring at the sleeping Dikta, Aza could see a tired line on the young man's face. One more person who must be involved in his life problems. In the past he only wanted to give the man a lesson, but seeing how seriously the man took his role as a husband made Aza think differently.

It should have been from the beginning that they had never met, what Dikta could expect from him. Her skin is not as good as other girls, even her behavior is very annoying. Or should it never even exist? Why do people always get into trouble when they help them? Why do people hate it for ridiculous reasons?

"Sorry..." Lirih Aza slowly. Then put the food on the nightstand. Then put the sticky note that he had prepared beforehand.

He wanted to go somewhere today, calm his mind.

***

Nadira Gumala

People say she is his mother. The most beloved woman of Mrs Kusuma. Even Hendri was still willing to accommodate Nadira despite being pregnant with a child that he thought was the result of an affair.

Unfortunately, his birth was not to be loved. His birth was to blame for the death of Nadira, his mother. His birth to be hated because of the child of infidelity. The more thought, Aza felt more and more resentful of Dangkal Kusuma's thoughts. They believe in facts whose truth has not been officially proven. All the evidence that happened in the past is based only on 'he said' at the behest of Gayatri-His grandmother.

Aza turned her head when she felt someone observing her, her body frozen. The person he missed the most, who had always been there for him since childhood, was now standing in front of him. With one elbow stick, it helps the body to stand upright.

"Ma.na..." Ogre the man, without a word Aza immediately ran to hug the man until the man almost lost his balance. Aza cried so hard that her throat hurt.

"That's oko....! Where the hell is that?..." He was crying in the middle of his sobs.

In other places Dikta was in the fog when he woke up from his sleep and did not find Aza anywhere. Actually, what makes her panic is the message that the girl conveyed to the sticky note left behind.

I'm goin. Enjoy breakfast, recover soon.

Khanzas

Where did the girl go? As long as he knew her, the girl only went out to the bookstore and food stall. It is also impossible to go to college. He was not allowed to go to campus during the ospek.

Contacting his friends to help find Aza, he did not want to tell Kusuma. The problem will increase if he does so.

"Where are you Aza?" He murmured in panic, while riding his duck motorbike towards the gathering place with his friend.

"Lo calm down first, let's clear his mind." Tedjo.

"How can Jo calm down." Reply Dikta resigned.

"Gue doesn't know where Aza usually goes." Added.

"Awhile" said Esa.

"The son of Ansos and does not like the crowd, right?" Ask Esa who is possessed by Dikta.

"Have you checked into her subscription bookstore?" Esa asked, Dikta nodded back.

"Hmmm, there's one more place anyway, the possibility." Esa muttered, Dikta immediately sped up.

"My aunt once worked as a maid at the Kusuma residence, and from her story," Nanang cut off her speech that mocked her style of speech.

"Dot!! He," Directly the three looked at Nanang annoyed.

"If the first lady Kusuma is gone," Dikta immediately realized.

"Yah!!! Yes, the grave of Madame Nadira!" Dikta immediately ran towards the parking lot, the others were in a fog following Dikta. When he arrived at the parking lot, Dikta stopped.

"Gue doesn't know the place" he said, who was greeted by upsetting his friend.

"Lo call Aza's family gih, ask for the address." Nanang.

"So there's runyam." Reply Dikta,

"In the meantime, I'm looking for info from my aunt." Esa said while holding her phone trying to contact someone.

After 5 minutes, Esa returned with a sumringah. Signs of getting the news needed.

"Motor lo stay here alone, with Tedjo's car just so don't split up." Esa speech that is approved by all.