All Just Because of Envy

talita

I opened my eyes, I looked at the whole room and I was in my parents' house.

really I don't remember what happened, and why I'm still here. Even the day has started the night I saw the wall clock shows at 20:00 wib.

mom opened the door and entered.

"lita, are you awake, son? you okay? what do you feel right now?"

"lita, it feels weak ma, maag lita feels sore."

"we should go to the doctor, son."

I just kept quiet and didn't answer my mom, I felt empty.

not long papa came in.

"let's go to the doctor, papa also happens to want a routine check."

I just followed, papa and mama said, I followed them to the doctor.

there the doctor gave me some pieces of medicine, headache medicine, ulcer medicine, and antibiotics that were prescribed to be taken 1*3 per type for 5 days.

before going to bed I took all the prescribed medications, and I fell asleep.

the third day I took the doctor's medicine I found 3 spots filled with water on the area of my lips, like chicken pox.

I didn't press it. I thought I was bitten by an insect.

during the day the speck of water filled all my lips, I walked to the dining table and sat there. I had to show the speck on my lips on my mother. the speck of water filled spots was enough to make me feel a hot and painful pain in the area of my lips.

a few moments arrived I felt the heartburn and my stomach ache once, then I vomited, my head was dizzy amazingly, my body was cold hot, and my body was weak.

"brakkkk.

I felt my body was very light, my surroundings were white with no view.

I don't know where I am, I'm like a confused person, I don't see anything but white.

but I could hear the hysterically crying voice of my mother calling my name. Papa's voice kept calling me. The voice of my two older brothers and my sister's voice also called while crying.

I was so scared and confused, where am I?

why is it all just white and I can hear their voices but I can't see where they are.

I curled up in fear, bowed my head and hugged my legs tightly, and I cried as I would.

in my heart I pray.

"Lord, lita does not know what is happening. Litta is afraid of God, please litta God.where litta is rediscovering litta in the litta family of God...Oh, my God..."

I kept praying and begging God, as I lifted my head,

I saw a bright light, I followed it.

I woke up, like I woke up from a dream, I found me lying on a bed with a few hoses in my body.

I saw that no one was with me, because I was so tired that I fell asleep again.

when I opened my eyes again, I found my mother beside me.

mama's eyes seemed like she was crying, I smiled at her, I wanted to say something to her but I couldn't talk anymore, because there was a hose attached through my mouth.

there were so many hoses in my body that it hurt my body, but I was unable to rebel because my body was so weak.

mama looked at me with her anxious face, her eyes glazed with glass.

and I also looked in the glass, because in my heart I felt so sinful that it made my mother and all my family members sad.

in my heart say "sorry ma, forgive litta yes 😭

3days I open but not healed, I want to go home.

but I couldn't talk, I tried to tell my mother, brother, and papa with my code.

they finally understood that I wanted to talk about something.

my brother gave me a pen and a book to write.

yes I can still move my hands, I write: I want to go home, litta at home.

at first they disagreed.

but finally after consulting with the doctor they agreed.

I feel like my life is not long.

mama kept crying looking at my condition, and I saw that papa also stole from crying, he was just trying to toughen up in front of everyone.

for 3 days Dennis only came for a while every night to visit me.

even though he did not say a word, but it was painted on his face how scared he was.

but he never spoke with words.

honestly I'm disappointed...

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