Why Different?
Needs
Moana could only calm herself down repeatedly when she found a piece of wedding invitation lying on her desk, upon her return from a meeting outside the office. The name listed there was definitely not the name that Moana wanted to see to match another name other than her, but since everything had already happened, she had no choice but to accept it.
“Tadi Juan came anterin the invitation itself. He also has a parcel for all of us.” The information that Galih gave it only went into the right ear, then quickly penetrated out through the left ear. Moana is also not interested in the contents inside the parcel that Juan left behind, because she is tired of managing her own feelings that are crushed to melt.
“Mo, you okay?”
“I am not.” With a blank stare thrown out the window, Moana replied thus. My struggle must be finished here, how is the story I can still be okay?”
Concerned, but there is not much Galih can do to comfort the heartbroken Moana. The man in the dark blue shirt just patted Moana on the shoulder briefly, then moved while leading his other coworkers to leave the room. He thought, Moana might need some time to cry over her broken heart without anyone watching.
Unlike usual, even the annoying Luke complies when Galih asks them to vacate the room. While chewing on the chocolate bars he stole from pantri—entah belonging to whom—lelaki was walking out according to Galih's direction after taking a quick glance at Moana who was standing stiffly in front of her work desk—lesu, who was not a single person, like a living corpse.
The silence created after the departure of all colleagues did not necessarily make Moana so that she could shed her tears. Right now, he was too confused. Instead of being sad, he felt an outpouring of anger that was so great, making his chest hot and seemed to be about to explode.
He did not hate Juan for his decision to marry Zahira. He also did not hate Zahira for being someone who made him unable to get a chance to be with Juan. Moana is angry with herself, because she can't stop loving Juan even though she realizes the possibility that she can reciprocate for love is very small. Moana angry. He was upset at himself losing control.
Moana knew it would eventually hurt, but she still tried to deceive herself that everything would end beautifully while she kept trying. In this life, there are some things that will still not be achieved, no matter how hard we try. Sometimes, it is almost dying though, what we want still cannot be grasped because God does not predestine it for us. On the contrary, there are things that we do not want, yet constantly come to us so easily without us trying. When we are conscious, those things are not something we want, but unconsciously are something we need.
God gives us what we need, not what we want. Gradually, Moana began to understand that. He did want Juan because his feelings for the man were intense. However, without him knowing, it may not be Juan that he needs in this twists and turns of life.
Gasps, Moana again sighed. Invitation paper he took, then he put it in a bag. Instead of wishing Juan and Zahira all the best, Moana chose to pray for herself that afternoon. In order for himself to be more sincere, so that he is more willing to accept God's provisions. Also, so that he could more quickly fade his feelings to Juan so that other men could enter his heart.
...🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁...
Invitations, building, catering. Everything was taken care of by my mother. The bride and groom only live foot barges, while contributing ideas about what kind of wedding dream they want to realize.
As someone who didn't want to take a chance in narrowness, Zahira obviously rejected the idea at first. He insists on taking care of everything on his own with Juan, using both of their savings.
However, Chyntia was no less stubborn. The woman desperately convinces Zahira that this is her last form of devotion to the son, before she actually lets the son live the household life alone with his wife, who is, without any interference at all. Because he did not want the wedding plan to be a debate, Zahira also relented. She let her future mother-in-law do whatever she wanted. While he and Juan only pay attention while occasionally asking for advice if it is asked.
“Za,”
"Hm."
“Ice cream snack, yuk?”
Zahira turned her head, “Now?” he half whispered.
“Iya. Yuk?”
“Let's go, wait for kelar.” Zahira whispered again. Because, they are in a meeting with the wedding organizer to maximize all preparations for the wedding that will be held in eight days.
“No want, want now.” Whine Juan, like a baby.
Because they continued to whisper, Chyntia who was listening to the words of one of the wedding organizer staff turned her head, presumably curious what was being fussed by the couple.
“Why? You guys need anything? Or is there something you want to convey to the wedding organizer?” chyntia asked, thinking that the neighbor whispers she heard had something to do with the wedding preparations. Though not at all.
“Zahira peeping ice cream snacks said.” Juan, suddenly made Zahira as a fallout to fulfill his desire to buy ice cream.
Unable to be accused, Zahira shook her head quickly, then she pointed to Juan as a sign that her future husband was the one who really wanted to snack.
Fortunately, Chyntia understood. Maybe because of his fellow women, or it’s just simply because Juan is his son and he already understands very well the character of the child.
“Let me finish this one convo, and then you can go anywhere you want with my baby.” Chyntia said, clearly addressed to Juan who had already weaved his lips. “Can I?”
“Okay, okay.” Juan turned the lazy eyeball, then slumped his body until his head was parallel to the long bench where the meeting was taking place.
The explanation of the wedding organizer staff who had been interrupted was again spliced, and really only Chyntia listened carefully because Juan was instead engrossed in playing the wheeled chair she was sitting in, going back and forth was like riding a Bomb car in the playground. While Zahira also could not focus on listening, the reason he had to occasionally pinch Juan in order for the man to return to the herd.
Ten minutes passed, the meeting was over. Juan became the first person to rise from the chair while cheering, making some wedding organizer staff shakes inexhaustible at the bride and groom whose show they are handling this. Just this time they found a bride-to-be who seemed not interested at all in the series of wedding events and was even eager to buy ice cream.
“Please understand, he’s a giant baby.” Chyntia apologized and asked for an impeachment for her son's absurd attitude. The staff nodded along with a light nudity. In the midst of their heavy workers, Juan's behavior was actually an entertainment in itself.
“I’ll take my baby out, bye bye!” not yet finished greeting given by Chintya and Zahira, Juan already scuffed once. With Zahira's arm drawn, his future wife was invited to run away from the room. As if they were to delay by one second, they would miss the train.
“The ice cream shop will not suddenly move to Africa even though we walk slowly.” Zahira protested, but his little legs kept running following Juan's direction.
“It's not about the ice cream shop, it's about me not being in the room for this horror that I don't understand.” After some distance from the meeting hall area, Juan gave a confession. His legs also slowly stopped running, starting to slowly walk again.
“Arunaway, huh?” Zahira quipped, while Juan nodded without hesitation while grinning.
“Emang you are not dizzy with the Mbak earlier said what?” askalanya.
Instead of giving a counter answer, Zahira instead shook her head at the sign that they were in the same camp. Suddenly, their laughter exploded simultaneously. His spirit airs, reaching the ears of people who pass by to make them stop for a moment to check. And when they found the laughter coming from a pair of young men who radiated the aura of love to meters away, they smiled as well.
“I love you.” Said Juan.
“I know.” Zahira.
Not satisfied with that answer, Juan turned his head quickly while scowling. “I said I love you.” Deuteronomy, more emphasis.
“I know, Juan.” Reply Zahira again.
“Ugh! You byebelin.” Even so, Juan still did not let go of his grasp and chose to continue the step.
Zahira smiled. This adorable side... Zahira believes only he can see her besides Juan's parents and Pain Killer's friends. This big baby will never show the cute and adorable side which is even though it is a special attraction. Yeah, Zahira's grateful for that. Because if Juan shows it to many people, there are fans of the man will immediately increase by five billion.
“I love you.” Zahira said suddenly, when in fact Juan was no longer demanding Zahira to return his love.
Clearly, it made Juan turn his head quickly with an irresistible funny expression. “Huh?” askenya.
“I said I love you, whether you know it or not.”
“Sial.” You know, Juan cursed.
Zahira was clearly confused. She just declared love, but instead got a curse instead? Oh, what's wrong?
“No, no. I said that to myself.” Juan was praying just because Zahira kept looking at him in confusion. “Indeed this self-fuck, always can't stand the peeper biting your lips every time you say things that make my heart deg-degan.” Further.
Already know not what he will get as a gift for having spoken carelessly? Yeah, correct. A deadly tremor from a skinny hand whose damage is deadlier than a professional bouncer.
“Not married already KDRT just you!” the protest, then hit back Zahira's hand slowly. “No can do that, durhaka.”
“Not yet husband, not going to durhaka.” Zahira ngeyel, this time pinched Juan's arm until the man screamed in pain.
“SAKIT! YOU DON'T BE A SIKOPAT!!”
“So here doang, no need lebay!” Zahira repeated her pinch.
“ASTAGHFIRULLAH, MY FUTURE WIFE SIKOPAT, HOW IS THIS GOD?!!!”
Seeing her lover in pain, Zahira giggles. Right, it looks like he's turned into a psychopath by now.
...🍁🍁🍁🍁🍁...
The initial intention of buying ice cream, the edges even go around the shopping center. Anything is bought. Starting from the toothbrush, tumblr lights, to the underwear Juan put in the trolley. Zahira is bodo. He just tailed in the back while enjoying a vanilla chocolate flavored ice cream, waiting for random items what else Juan would buy next.
“Which color is it? Blue or pink?” juan asked as he thrust out the nonstick teflon that he faintly picked off the shelf.
“Blue.” Answer Zahira.
Juan nodded, just immediately he put one teflon blue color according to Zahira's choice into the trolley, adding to the list of groceries that were almost over.
“Then this, which bagusan?” this time, an ornate pot contained an imitation plant that he had pointed at.
Zahira gave a quick glance, then let out a long sigh right after her ice cream ran out. “What to buy that for? We can plant the original.” He said, reluctant to choose one among the many types of imitation plants that Juan pointed.
“So don't buy?”
“Neventless. You don't waste money, the cost of the reception is all Mama's responsibility.” Omel Zahira, then he took over the trolley and pushed it away so that nothing else Juan put in it. “Udah afternoon, let's go home.”
“To our home?”
“Ke home each.”
Juan moaned, his steps suddenly sluggish, but from earlier he was very excited to push the trolley to and fro.
Arriving in front of the cashier, Zahira returns the trolley to Juan's hand. “You pay first, I'll go to the toilet for a while. If you're done first before I go back, you just wait in front of the entrance.”
“Sama I went to the toilet.” Juan holds.
“So I have to pee until your groceries are as bad as it is finished scanned? Nope, not first.” Go Zahira to the toilet, leave Juan with his groceries that are asabrek—and I don't know what the benefits are.
“What do I buy, deh?” said Juan while holding a dark blue manual beard shave. Even though at home he has an electric one, which is certainly more sophisticated.
Huh... I don't know, maybe Juan is in a trance of mad mothers discounting that anything so bought when not necessarily need or not.
Seriate
