Three Years Different

109 (2): Early Mardiyah Day Talk And Grandma Aisha.

Early morning. At 02.00 WIB. Mardiyah awoke when she felt uncomfortable moving to the left, because it turned out that Lutfan fell asleep by hugging her. Sometimes it is always like this, does Lutfan's hand not tingle? Or sick?

Mardiyah lowered Lutfan's hand slowly from her shoulder. Then he moved slowly to get down the bed, and looked at the mirror directly, without realizing it his eyes were swollen. I really cried all night. Even it feels like to open your eyes a hard, his mind by starting to stand, walking away from the room to the kitchen.

"Sepy." Mardiyah stared at Grandma Aisha's room door for a moment. "Grandmother ... still awake or asleep? I ... worry."

A glass of Mardiyah water sipped with a seat. Then he stood up again to open the door of the Grandmother's room, and entered slowly. Seen Grandma Aisha lying asleep facing left, she was alone, she thought it was with Umm Sarah. When he arrived at the edge of the bed, Mardiyah chose to sit down together, while looking at the wrinkled face.

Grandma ... was Grandma that angry when she found out I wasn't Mom? inner Mardiyah.

Sreg.

He made the movement by changing the sleeping position to the left where directly Mardiyah can stare. That wizened and wistful face, not similar to her, didn't it mean that she was similar to Grandfather?

"Mr .." - Lirih Mardiyah.

The eyes are not open at all.

"Sorry Grandma's granddaughter, huh?" Mardiyah paused by sitting quietly under the bed. "I'm sorry for all my mistakes, Grandma. Starting from pretending to be a mother, and also my mistake in accepting Mr. Gautama as a father."

Mardiyah. His eyes looked at the floor, then the next second glazed over. "I've always hoped Mom .. and Dad never met, Grandma. So ... there will be no me. Grandma and Grandpa will not lose Mom. And you're not going to go that painful way either."

"Repeat."

Mardiyah. Grandma Aisha's eyes suddenly opened. So the voice came from him? "Repeat all your words" he continued.

"grandmother ..."

"You hope my son and Adiwangsa don't meet?" Grandma Aisha pauses. "You need to know, that this whole life. The hope I've always hoped for is .. the loss of the nightmare about the passing of my son Nitha."

Mardiyah.

"You ... as Nitha's son. Should have understood her suffering better than I was her mother. Why do you acknowledge that bastard as your father? Was the birth Nitha gave you not enough? To the extent that you thirst for affection from that man? Why are you looking for your grandmother? After all, your extended family accepts you cheerfully. Even Manggala doesn't hate you at all. He didn't hate it when he looked at you instead of looking at my son! That old man, really contributed to my son's suffering. And you ... could have appeared before me by showing off the love of the family that hurt my son!" connect Grandma Aisha.

Mardiyah. "Nek .. I .. don't intend that. I'm looking for Grandma too. 'cause I want to know about Mom. I want to know all the memories that Mom lives with Grandma. I ..."

"Liar. The proof is that you live happily with Tama," said Grandma Aisha.

"What happiness did Grandma see? We've only met for a few months." Netra Mardiyah was glazed again. He stared at Grandma Aisha. "Grandmother doesn't know how sick I am living in an orphanage. Umma Sarah's good. But she's not my mother. If Grandma asks, is this birth that Mom gave me not enough? I'll answer, not enough, Grandma."

"Because I also need a mother in the world. Why was I born to live alone, Grandma? Grandma heard the news too, right? My mother died from poison. She also wrote a letter that I had to read when I grew up. I've read, Grandma ... Mom said Mom was raped. Even ... Just to protect me from the Adiwangsa family, I don't want to give me a name, Grandma." Mardiyah. "The name I have is from Umma Sarah. My in-law, Grandma. Mother of Lutfan. Even he was willing to share the love of his son for me, Grandma."

"And on the day Mr. Gautama and Mr. Manggala came. Kiai Bashir and Umma Sarah stand in front of me, Grandma. He admitted that I was his family. Now Grandma asks how can I acknowledge Mr. Gautama as Father?" Mardiyah bit her lower lip slowly. "This is all because of Mrs Cecilia's plea. She is the wife of Mr. Gautama. Nek .. Everyone feels pain. Either I, either Mother, Grandmother, Lady Cecilia, Mr. Gautama, and also Mr. Manggala. All sick, Grandma. Grandma could not blame any side. Because in the end, Grandma also .. participated in hurting Mom."

Aisha's grandmother fell silent, upon hearing her grandson's last words.

"Now .. as Grandma's granddaughter. I'm sorry. Whatever I did to Grandma, I'm really sorry. And if Grandma wants to, this week Grandma went to Mother's funeral," continued Mardiyah by staring at the Grandma.

"Know from my son's grave?"

"Rajendra, the son of Lady Cecilia," answered Mardiyah.

Aisha's grandmother asked, "Child of Gautama?"

"Yes. He helped me, Grandma. And I trust him. If Grandma wants to see Mom. Grandma should come along." Mardiyah. "Grandma wants to, right?"

[.]