The Suffering of the Wife I Divorced

Chapter 10

"When he came and your mom called him Zack, I just took a few months ago when I brought your phone, I watched him on your social media. Keep looking at her wedding photo post," Bian admitted honestly. "Don't marry a man who has another wife, Ra. Says—"

"Zack has been cerei, the household only lasted three months," said Amara, then silent for a moment.

Seeing that Bian's only reaction and response were only calm, Amara was a little upset as to why the man didn't look jealous. For some reason, it was in Amara's mind to tell Bian who Zack was to him.

"He was my ex-boyfriend before I got married." Then Amara saw Bian's eyes looking surprised, just a glance before finally the man relaxed again. "I broke up with him and asked him to find a future husband. Back then, there happened to be a distant colleague of my late mother's family. Kaya became the matchmaking broker, I continue to be known as Angga. The next meeting I got married, thought nothing, the important thing is I got married."

"You were nineteen, weren't you, Ra?" bian commented with furrowed brows in wonder. "Why do you get married at that age?

"There are some things I can't explain right now." Amara raised her shoulders indifferently.

Bian again asked, "You used to be dating Zack together single right? How long have you been dating?"

Amara moved her eyeballs, as if remembering things she never forgot.

"I've liked him since childhood" murmured Amara slowly.

Bian's eyebrows are increasingly intertwined, a little amused to hear Amara's confession. However, since there was nothing Bian wanted to do now, he eventually chose to listen to Amara.

"Then?" Finally Bian asked, with interest— a little want to know if there is a strong reason for Amara to decide to marry Zack. "That's when you meant to be small, dwarf-sized, Ra?"

"Not that also means it," grumbled Amara full of rakhkan. "I was seven years old when I moved to this village. Starting to enter SD also fitting stay here. Continue to religious school. Well, Zack is his son who owns the madrassa. She's kind. The sound is good if again njaji same adzan ..."

Amara's voice became a quiet whisper as she continued, "My father graduated from Elementary School, I didn't go to school. Keep me working at her parents' place she—"

"What do you do at that age, Ra?" Bian couldn't hide his surprise. "Why not go to Junior High School?"

"If not for not having money to make a list fee, monthly SPP, buy uniforms, school equipment, the same cost in the future, what else?" Amara raises her shoulders. "So I worked at the madrasa, help me whistle the class until magrib. At that time of fasting month, Zack is often a bad takjil if I want to go home. But not long work there, only three months. Abis taun new I join people's cooperation, in Bantar Gebang—Bekasi, continue ..."

"Oh my goodness, Ra. How can your parents work? That's your age thirteen years—"

"But our condition at that time is difficult to explain, you have to understand first how it feels really hard, until hunger, then you will understand," concluded Amara bitter. "There was a moment when I would owe rice to the stall was also not given because I was afraid that my father could not pay, and we were also not long ago in this village."

Alright, Bian realized that the naivety side of Amara is now re-emerging. So, Bian again tried to focus on hearing the story of Amara— and actually Bian did want to know the history of Amara's life that seems to sound sad.

Although Bian was once Amara's husband, even so briefly. However, of course, Amara had never previously told her that she did not attend school.

Bian recalled their meeting, about how Amara used to behave.

Regardless of how they first met, but the way Amara spoke, was polite, and it was hard to believe that the woman was indeed lacking in education.

So, no wonder Bian was really surprised to hear about Amara's childhood.

How not? At that age, at a time when most children should have earned the right to learn and play, Amara actually had to be friendly with work, and lost the adolescence that should be fun.

Bian felt his heart pounding with pain, for reasons he could not understand. Especially after hearing of Amara's childhood.

However, Bian did not want to show his concern excessively, because he knew that sometimes Amara did not want to live under the mercy of people.

"So three-year-old babysitter, mother and father work. But not me doang, there are two, the assistant is different again. But not for long, just two months, I came home" Amara explained. "When I was seventeen, I tried again working at Zack's parents' place. But his Zack was not there at the time, he was already working in Jakarta. Then, when he came home, he said he liked me. Yaudah we made it so, dating for two years, I—"

"Why didn't you marry him?" bian comments, trying to be relaxed— especially when hearing Amara's tone as if to think of Bian like a friend. "Can you really sound like, dating the same people we like, keep suddenly marrying each other?"

Amara's expression turned slightly awkward and stiff. He bit his lip for a moment. Then he fell silent again, as if he had just been made aware, why did he have to tell Bian those times?

"Ah, the point is now I want to marry him," said Amara finally.

"Why does he have to, Ra?" bian asked with a slow accent. "Why not me? I also don't have a wife now, I can say—"

"I don't want to be with you anymore, B*ngs*t!" timpal Amara with a slightly high tone. "And I told you, unfortunately I'm with you, I won't let you keep hurting me. If I accept you again, it is not impossible in the future you will hurt me again. Dicerein is like that, the pain is still feeling until now!"

Bian didn't know how he should respond to Amara's words. The woman always managed to make her heartburn, and every word seemed to be aimed at slapping Bian.

It would be a lie if Bian did not feel pierced with every sentence Amara said with teeth grinding, as if showing the wound he had inflicted on his heart because of the divorce, maybe the wound never dried.

Once again Bian is slapped in reality, making him realize that getting back with Amara is impossible. She should have been aware that Amara protested and refused to be divorced. Then, how could Bian now think Amara could just accept him? Did he forget to tear Amara's heart apart?

For a moment, Bian tried to remember what made those feelings and hopes re-emerge in his heart. Hoping to get back together with Amara, righting the wrongs she did, washing away the wounds she had inflicted for divorcing her.

Then Bian remembered, the hope of returning it began to grow when he first saw Amara in the midwife. Seeing the look in her eyes that radiated a radiance full of longing was incredible, and Bian was sure that was the only reason why she had guessed that Amara still loved her.

However, apparently he was wrong, even too misrepresenting his conversation with Amara when they were in the delivery room.

'If Mora dies, don't take the baby. Don't take care of your wife. I'm the same ade-ade Mora who will take care. Don't take it ...."

'If you take the baby after I die ... I will rise from the grave for your nyekik, Fabian Gaddafi!'

'If so, you don't have to die. You have to live for nyaksiin if I won't take our son and ngasiin him to someone else. Let's take care of him together, okay?'

At that time Amara no longer replied, focusing on listening to midwives. It seems Bian misinterpreted all the meanings of the conversation. She thinks Amara agreed to take care of their baby together. However, it seems Amara just needs to convince herself that Bian will not take it.

Bian laughed in his heart. Laughing at her insolence hoping that Amara could easily forgive her. Of all the people, it should be Bian who knows best that the woman can't possibly forgive him.

Do not want to be fixated with a situation that suddenly turns awkward. Bian chose to move while carrying a tray containing dirty dishes and glasses.

However, her steps halted for a moment in the doorway, she tried to hold back her rumbling chest so as not to affect her mood. Especially when the feeling of regret re-emerged, making all over Bian's body feel pain.

Bian took a deep breath. Then, without looking back at Amara, Bian said in a choked voice, "I'm a son of a bitch, you've never been in my plans. Everything happens without me controlling it. Among all people, you should be the one who knows the most that I do not want to mess around during your marriage even though you are only a second wife."