Tafakur Love Mualaf

Farewell

The next morning, I went back to school. My eyes have been looking swollen, crying all night because of the voice of Ima's mother. Suppose I don't remember my parents, I want to feel angry saying everything. I don't want to reprimand him anymore I thought. I really couldn't bear it, given his behavior over these two years. I'm not the one who's going to yell out in anger, but the one who's going to stay away without wanting to come back. When the break came, Aluna and I sat next to the class.

"I want to finish quickly, from this Pomegranate Middle School." I said, with a half-sobbing tone of voice.

"Why Firsya?" ask Aluna.

"I don't feel right at this school. Even those who did me were scapegoated, and had to cry every day" I told him, with water running down the corner of my eye.

"If I want to work, I'll graduate later." Answer while looking down.

"Where's Aluna?" my many.

"Not yet" he answered.

The two of them spoke beside the class, there was a sense of tightness in Firsya's heart. Digesting many times, the words of his classmates were. Even some of the school residents did not know anything, meddling in his affairs. Already fanning, flying fake news is like the wind.

"Do you know, they're gossiping I'm dating her. It's all fake, and it's not true. Though I don't like it being disseminated, why should you betray me Aluna?" Can't explain the pain of receiving the treatment of people around, more than unrequited love.

"I'm sorry Firsya, I'm sorry." replied Aluna.

"Let me give up. I want to say anything, I am not listened to and trusted. They're the ones who are right and feel the most sociable, and I'm the introvert who's always wrong." I bend my knees with my hands, while my head curls up. It was hard to explain the feeling of mental exhaustion, in the wounds inflicted by some of my classmates.

Those who are evil too, write insults on paper in the name of Rulif. The content in the letter was, a mere sheepfight. Look at me when I get angry and write status, they end up judging me like a thrill seeker. The universe cannot lie in testimony. They just want to cover up the mistakes, so that Ima's mother is not angry with him.

The days passed, and today came the school farewell. I deliberately stopped by first, to my friends' boarding house. They were all preparing, and I was waiting outside. I talked a little with Surti.

"Surti, Eni's Rulif's cousin, right?" tanyaku.

"Eh not Firsya, they are dating" Surti replied, smiling.

I can hardly believe it. "But, Aluna told me they were cousins."

"No Firsya, they're dating. Look, it's that close" he replied.

I smiled and just shook my head. Patience, patience, soon not to see it also my mind. We all went into the room, which became the release of students and schoolgirls. Everyone is beautiful, looks beautiful to a girl. That morning the clothes looked diverse, some were wearing brocade and kebaya clothes. That day was a farewell day, between Firsya and Rulif.

We capture the moment of farewell, so that there can be remembered. Only my usual friends are close to me. I can't accept, when I have to take a photo together. I don't remember being together at all, but remember there was still something good about me. Among them not all are evil, so I am reluctant to get angry in front of the innocent. Fear if something is wrong, with their word.

Done already, farewell event. I rode a motorcycle on the road, crying. Why should I not enjoy my school days, why should I get a part of meeting Sakim and Ido. I am not sincere in what they have done.

I returned home, with dried up tears on my cheeks. It's over, just waiting for the SKHU file to land on me. Planning to work, living alone. Everything comes to mind, but humans can only plan.

I took the SKHU, when the time came. Go with Aluna, Atul, and his sister Zian Atul. When I got to school, I got a bad look. Mr. Mizi deliberately wanted to ridicule me again. Oh calm down, I'm actually not one to be too offended. But I'm the one who can tell the difference, who's joking and who's insulting.

"Why take SKHU?" tanyanya, while tilting the corners of her lips.

"For the work of sir." I answered flatly.

"You who?" tanyakanya.

"Firsya sir, cook forget." Atul answered, smiling.

They thought the teacher was just joking, but they didn't know how many times he had underestimated me. How many times have I been insulted in class, even with subtle innuendo.

I can't speak, I can't help but cry. I don't want to be bullied, or else he'll insult me more. I thought I was weak, and I couldn't defend myself.

I can't go on a rampage, for the sake of self-respect. But yes, if I am heard, it is not the same in vain. Mr. Mizi looks like he wants to win by himself, every time I want to explain he has cut it. As if he didn't give me a chance, to myself explain the turmoil in the chest. There is only a heart that will never want to go back to school again.

"Firsya, you're so arrogant. Salaman dong with Ima's mother." said Mr. Mizi.

I was quiet, he should have known. Here I am the victim, who is covered in blood. But still choose to eat the heart, rather than uphold real justice. Arguing with people like them, will only get us targeted.

I shook hands with Ima's mother, without saying anything. Only leave after being satisfied to be voiced by Mr. Mizi. If I didn't remember him as a teacher, I might have thrown him out.

We never know in the future, what fate will be. Don't know that out there, it might be very difficult to find a job. Not enough struggle interview once, directly get a work call. That's what I went through, after a few months.

I was sad, but I didn't want to be discouraged. Let those above consider myself small. In reality, all humans are small. The greatest in the world is only God.