Should I Joke (Again)
04. Alone first
This Saturday as planned Renita will visit the grave of her late husband, and will stay at his parents' house.
After preparing to bring a backpack containing some clothes and other equipment, Renita went down the stairs to the family room. His brother and nephew just got home from the hospital.
Greeting all the members of his large family who seemed present to welcome the little one, Renita then filled her stomach before leaving. While enjoying her breakfast, Renita occasionally feeds Fina, the puffed up boy accompanying his tantric meal.
Because Renita was going to travel so she had breakfast alone, fortunately there was Fina who would accompany her so she did not feel bored. After cleaning the cutlery, Renita then say goodbye to her family.
"Ma, Pa, Rei departs yes, let's have bad luck especially now the weekend must be jammed." Pamit Rei kisses her parents' hands.
"yes, be careful to bring his car do not have to speed if tired to stop at the rest area" said the father
"Rei, remember your mama's message of courtesy even though Anton isn't with you anymore but still think of them as your parents." The mama added, answered with a nod of Rei's head.
"Yes, definitely. Brother, bang.. Rei left first. Assalamualaikum."
"Waalaikumsalam" answered the whole family.
Drove his car splitting the city towards the outside of the city, passing several tourist attractions in the city. Anton's family home is on the border with a neighboring town.
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Natural scenery with a stretch of rice fields and hills is indeed a special attraction, so it is made a place of recreation and resting place.
Along the way Rei enjoyed the trip accompanied by the strains of songs played by radio stations. Sometimes they follow by singing songs.
It didn't feel like Rei had driven out of his car for three hours, entering the gate of a cemetery complex. After parking his car, and taking the bag, and also the flowers he bought on the trip earlier. With sunglasses perched on her nose, Renita heads towards the deceased's navel.
He sat himself on a rock, opened the letter and read it, not forgetting the prayer to his beloved. Rei's tears escaped through his defenses.
"Aamiin" Rei concluded his prayer, the longing for the figure of the late Anton was never denied.
Three years together before finally deciding to get married after the two were financially established, after Rei was accepted as a permanent employee at the Bank where he worked.
Had followed to her husband's place of service the first time, even until the fateful incident occurred. Rei again turned the memory when the deceased said goodbye for the last time before leaving for Papua.
#Flashback On
"Whatever happens, you never change. Be still yourself, be there or be no me by your side you must remain cheerful, never change." Anton stroked Rei's long hair, the two hugged each other.
For some reason, Rei felt like this was going to be her husband's last hug. It does not feel like letting go, even all day they just stay at home to fill time with chatting.
Rei's tears fall, may she selfishly ask her husband not to go. But Rei realized marrying a TNI soldier meant having to be ready to accept the risk of being left behind even for good, for the sake of abandonment of the country.
When receiving an office marriage first, signing her marriage certificate also signed her husband's death contract. And Rei was ready for that, three years into a long distance relationship, sometimes her husband could not be contacted because he was in a conflict area, and a feeling of relief after meeting again.
"Hey, don't cry baby. Didn't you promise to accept me for who I am." Anton let go of his embrace when he realized his wife was sobbing.
Nodding his head, that was all Rei could do. The words that should be able to be said right now were even as silenced.
"I love you" said Anton wiping tears on chabby Rei's cheek. Lately his wife was a little sensitive, suddenly sulking, peng pampered, maybe because she would separate her mind.
"I love you more" Rei gently kissed her husband's lips. Smiling then, the two of them put their lips together again,****** and started to be aggressive.
Enjoy each*******, twist each other's tongues and start getting aroused. Eventually the two filled the room with sighs. Enjoy the last night before tomorrow Anton goes far carrying out the duties of the country.
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On the day of departure, after parting in his entire family, Anton hugged his wife kissing her forehead deeply and gently kissing her lips.
"Darling, I'm off to take care of you. If you're lonely, you call mom to keep you company." Anton wiped the tears on his wife's cheek, his tears fell.
"You are also careful not to leave prayers, read sholawat and remember me in your prayers." Anton recalled to his wife.
"Observations can't be anything. You can't go around" Rei scowled, she knew her husband wouldn't do that.
"Where do you want to go, baby, there's the forest. I have the same weapons and beasts." joked Anton
"Once, I'm leaving. Assalamualaikum"
Anton runs towards a military vehicle that will take him on duty with his fellow soldiers.
Coming home with a restless heart, made Rei uncomfortable. Not just this time, but why is his feeling unsettled. The departure of her beloved husband on the battlefield.
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The day changed, on television was widely reported about the arms contact between TNI forces and separatist members. There are casualties on both sides. Anton's parents have been accompanying Rei since Angon left for Papua.
Until suddenly the wedding photo on the wall of the living room fell and broke. Rei was shocked, it had been two days that he had not entered work because suddenly his body was weak. Forced to be rushed to the hospital to be handled by experts. But he did not want to linger there, accompanied by his two in-laws Rei finally decided to be treated at home.
Her feelings were back when trying to contact her husband but always out of reach. It gets worse when the in-law receives a call.
"Hello, yes, I myself" replied Papa Hadi
"Innalillahi Wa innailaihi rojiun" he said later, continuing to talk to the person who called him. Her tense face looked agitated. Somehow to deliver this news.
"Yes, thank you." The phone connection was then disconnected.
"Who called you?" ask the Holy Mother
"Pa, answer me. don't be quiet" he asked again while shouting, it felt like his emotions were unstoppable.
Looking towards his daughter-in-law, alternating with his wife, Papa Hadi knew they must have expected it but this sad news still had to be delivered.
"Pa.." said Renita.
Looking up and walking closer to the two, Papa Hadi sighed softly. Either way they should know.
"Rei, forgive papa" he said as he clasped his daughter-in-law's hand. Ms. Hadi who initially looked anxious, finally helped strengthen her daughter-in-law. Slowly rubbed her long hair and nodded at her husband.
"Rei, be patient Anton has returned to the power. Last night after more or less a shootout with the separatist movement Anton suffered a gunshot wound to his arm, and he was bleeding a lot."
"The four were rushed to the nearest hospital using heli but his life was not helped" Papa Hadi's cry broke out.
Renita could not hold back her tears, in the arms of her mother-in-law the two women of different ages were crying to give each other strength. And suddenly Renita collapses, she faints.
Both of her in-laws put her body in bed, they knew Rei was hit. Mama Suci gave eucalyptus oil in her sense of smell, on her feet that felt cold. Hope the son-in-law will soon be aware.
While waiting for Renita who is unconscious. Papa Hadi contacted all of his family, including his besi. They choose to use the first flight so that they can arrive as soon as possible.
An hour later Renita was aware, and soon came the other children of Pak Hadi and his family. Sadness was evident there, as the TNI extended family had to be prepared to lose loved ones to death on the battlefield.
"Rei be patient, Anton died as a hero.we must be proud." said Mas Bagus, the first son of Mr. Hadi. Rei nodded his head but his cries broke again as his sister-in-law and mother-in-law cried again.
Both of Rei's parents came to them immediately following his youngest son's house, they knew Rei was devastated. They
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Many times unconscious even the last Rei looks pale after bleeding. Apparently there is a fetus in the womb but because of the unstable condition of his body, finally the fetus that has not even eight weeks old it must be released.
The doctor who handled Rei asked his parents' approval to perform curette surgery, so that there were no problems with the contents in the future.
Rei's parents and in-laws were shocked, because at about the same time two sad news happened to the family. They agreed to discuss the matter when Rei's condition was better.
Days passed, the bodies of the late Anton and several colleagues had arrived at the airport, and headed to their respective funeral homes. After being sholatan and in Adzani, Anton's body was placed in his final resting place. Accompanied by a military ceremony, they escort Anton one last time.
Renita looked strong no more tears falling, but her eyes were empty. Imagining her two loved ones leaving her, her husband and her future son.
All his friends and relatives gave Rei support, but it seemed like it would take some time to recover his mental state. Fortunately, his family did not leave him in such a bad state.
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Through the period of his iddah, and also the end of his retirement. Rei knew as hard as he could, but he still couldn't change things. He was just a weak man before God. Luckily for Rei, his family and friends have always supported him through his difficult times.
Rei had to let them go, because they had the best place by his side. Rei said goodbye to his father-in-law, although heavy but for the sake of Rei's future they did not want to be selfish.
"Ma, Pa, I'm sorry Rei if Rei hasn't been a devoted child. Not yet able to give mama and papa grandchildren like brothers." sobbed Rei while kissing the hand of his mother-in-law.
Their cries broke, all feeling sad. Moreover, Rei not only gave cheer but also filled the void since Anton was assigned in the corner.
"Rei, papa wants to give you a message from Anton. This is his last message, and papa doesn't want him to be unsettled. Open it" said Papa Hadi.
Looking at the mother and the brothers, Rei opened the white envelope. How surprised Rei was, his tears escaped.
"Assynolajet. Renita darling, my wife. I'm sorry if you were forced to read this letter, but I wouldn't have calmed down leaving you if you hadn't read it.
I know you're strong, and you have to stay strong just be yourself. Don't be sad too long, I don't like to see you sad and you know that. After all you are the wife of a soldier, and you have already proven it. Smile Rei, get up and embrace your future.
I'm sorry if I haven't been able to keep you company, make you happy like a husband out there. I hope you don't regret marrying me. As a sign of my apology and my last wish to return to your mother and father's house, continue your life. Grab your future, don't wait for me but keep my name in your heart always.
This house is yours, take care. I love you, sorry I can't keep you company. Once again forgive me.
Wassalam, your husband."
Renita sobbed to read it, she did not expect the deceased to have prepared for her future even before the events of that period.
Crying, that's what Renita did. If you can choose, Rei better be with her husband anywhere even without money. Than to be left dead like this.
Rei said goodbye to his father, mother and Anton's brothers. Although it is hard to separate. They promised to continue to establish silaturrahmi.
#Flashback off
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And this is where Renita is now, stopping at a large house among the ancient houses of the countryside. Papa Hadi chose to stay in the village after retiring from the TNI. Enjoying his old age by growing crops and becoming a hydroponic vegetable.
Get out of the car and stand in front of his car, breathing fresh air than in the city. This is what Renita likes, the atmosphere is calm and nature is still beautiful. Moving his body, stretching his muscles during the long journey.
Parked her car before entering her mother-in-law's house, Renita saw a lot of ornamental plants that are now viral. Smiling considering the name of one of the plants was similar to his status, broad widow. I don't know what or who first gave me that name.
"Assalamualaikum" Renita knocked on the door. Twice there was no sound, not long before the door opened.
"Rei." asked the owner of the house, this middle-aged woman still showed her beauty, proved that it was really cared for.
Nodding, and Rei hugged her tightly. The two hugged each other, and occasionally the mother-in-law kissed her face. Holy mama's tears trickled down, indicating she missed Rei so much.
"Mama, how are you? Is it healthy, ma?" Rei took off his embrace, and hugged back tightly.
Holy Mama sobbed, her last meeting with the wife of the late Anton was during her second marriage to Reza. Although kangen, but they should not be selfish because Rei already has another family.
Until finally Rei's marital status reached their ears. They knew it would be heartache that Rei felt, but they had no right to interfere in the household affairs of his former son-in-law.
"Mommy's healthy Rei, papa's too."
"Mama and papa, as well as the brothers and sisters kangen loh same you. You never contact us again." said Holy Mama.
"I'm sorry Rei, ma. Rei stayed away for a moment, it took time to be alone."
"Yes, honey, we understand. I'm sorry, I didn't think about your feelings."
Rei shook his head, Holy mama never considered him anyone else even though Anton was no longer with them.
"Look yuk! Stay here, right?"
"Your room is still upstairs, want to rest first?"
"Yes ma, tired of driving yourself." Rei smiled. The two stepped into the dining room.
"Where is ma?"
"There, again behind me. Last abis harvest pokcoy with other fathers."
"yeah? tuh tuh"
Both of them passed through the dining room towards the backyard. Papa Hadi and some of his workers were wrapping vegetables to be sent to Supermarkets and Restaurants.
Squeezing her eyes, and smiling say Renita approached. Kiss her hands, and embrace her.
"Reina, papa kangen. You may not call us." he said sadly.
"Pa, sorry Rei yes. Now that Rei's here, don't be sad anymore."
Mama smiled seeing him, her tears dripping back. I haven't seen a sight like this in a long time.
"Who are you here, alone?" ask papa Hadi. Renita nodded her head.
"yes, who else"
"Papa thinks the same as the new father-in-law" joked papa Hadi, accompanied by the laughter of all his workers
"Ga pa, Rei still wants to be alone first"
